What Were Jesus's Masturbatory Fantasies Like?

[Guest AynRand]

Interesting posts....

 

If Jesus is a fictional character entirely I think that whatever sort of fantasy you would like to attribute to him is not going to accomplish anything other than to offend Christians and vent some anger.

 

It is a bit amusing to see a post like this hear after seeing how many threads/posts Christians can devote to their own personal angst and religious theories over the habit of masterbation.

 

If Jesus was a real person whose life came to be a bit exaggerated then I would have to agree with Soules premise that he may have attempted to play the part and reigned in any sexual desires that he may have had.

 

Everglaze, I am a tad bit curious as to why you would say that Jesus was a masochist. Is it a real theory or just a rant? Care to elaborate?

[Brother Jeff]

I think Jesus masturbated to Himself in the form of the Holy Farter. "O yes, Holy Farter! Farter, farter , O farter. YES! YES! YES, Holy Farter! Glory!"

[Knightley]

so... you're back?

[Brother Jeff]

so... you're back?

Yep, I'm back! Glory!

[Taphophilia]

I think Jesus was a masochist. He probably also dreamed about dry humping Mary Magdalene every time he was with her.

 

Who says Jesus wasn't gay? "Get behind thee Satan!" and wasn't John the desciple that Jesus loved, some gay loving that is.