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A Nice Little Chat With The Mormons


Astreja
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I was out on my front steps in the lovely evening air, learning a couple of classical guitar exercises, when they came.

 

Two fine, upstanding young men with white shirts, name tags, and books of Mormon.

 

I didn't feel like ruining my own day by verbally ripping their heads off, so I surprised myself by actually being nice to them. Patiently answered their questions about George, the 25-foot blue dragon who guards my front lawn. And we chatted briefly about music.

 

When they finally cut to the chase, so did I. They enquired if I had read the BofM.

 

"Not really my thing."

 

"Did you pray about it?"

 

"I don't pray to the gods," I said. "I hang out with 'em."

 

:twitch::eek:

 

Whereupon I outed myself as an Asatruar. They didn't know what that was. "Scandinavian," I said. "Follower of the old ways."

 

A pause that, in a clinical setting, would be fatal to rabbits.

 

"Do you know anyone else in the neighbourhood who might be interested? Or in the city?"

 

"I dunno. I don't really know many people well enough to know their spiritual preferences." And smiled, waved goodbye, and went back to playing my guitar.

 

That was fun. A bit unnerving, but fun.

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Unnerving as always to be accosted by Abrahamists, but nonetheless you handled it well, sister :)

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"I don't pray to the gods," I said. "I hang out with 'em."

 

:twitch::eek:

 

 

i would have loved to see thier faces when you said that. :lmao:

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Mormonborg, the feared MORG, now has you on its "quack list".

 

You will never be left alone until they are sucessful in turnin' you from yer wicked ways! :)

 

Love it.. That had to be a perfect "Kodak Moment"..

 

kevinL

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Hehehehehe

 

See, that right there's the most effective way I've ever found to deal with missionaries. No need to be an ass about it, just let 'em know you're not interested and give them a friendly wave goodbye.

 

...Of course, there's nothing wrong with a little harmless fun either. All Mormons should have the opportunity to meet George. :HaHa:

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Saw a commercial on TV months ago for the Book of Mormon. Hadn't seen one of those since I was a kid (maybe I wasn't looking hard enough?). In this particular ad they actually came out and said that the BoM was, in fact, the story of how Jesus came to America thousands of years ago and preached to the lost tribes of Israel who were living there in mythical cities. No shame, just came right out and said it.

 

Didn't take long for that to get off the air. (You've probably seen the new one: "Daddy, what happens after we die?" Non-aired answer: "Well, son, you and I become gods, while mommy and whoever your wife will be will spend eternity perpetually pregnant and giving birth to our spirit-children to populate our patriarchal planet." Son: [Rod and Tod style]: "Yay!")

 

Anyway, I can imagine why it got ripped off the airwaves so soon. Salt Lake City was probably inundated with phone calls asking, "Sweet Jesus, you believe in THAT?!"

 

By the way, the dragon sounds awesome. I'm still looking for one to guard my room. If yours has a litter, will you give me a pup?

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By the way, the dragon sounds awesome. I'm still looking for one to guard my room. If yours has a litter, will you give me a pup?
Well, George is a boy dragon. If you see any nice girl dragons, just point 'em in the general direction of the 'Peg and we'll see what happens.
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