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"pk" (pastor's Kid), And "mk" (missionary Kid) Check-in Thread.


Llwellyn
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I was wondering if there are any other MK's or PK's out there? :shrug:

 

Hi, my parents are missionaries and have been since before I was born. I grew up in Africa, and my parents are still working there, infecting African minds with the Christian cognitive virus ("divine destructive retribution," "penal substitutionary atonement," "justification by faith soteriology"). My sister and her husband are doing the same thing now. :vent: What do you say to your parents: "I believe that you are an enemy of mankind"? "Christianity is a public curse and you should not share it with others"? "The Bible functions no differently than a common chain letter"? :eek: Words cannot express the loathing I have for the uniquely Christian thoughts -- I am right there with Nietsche, Mencken, and Ingersoll. So, what does a guy like me do when I want to support my parents but want to undermine what they do? :scratch:

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Um, let's see. You can't sling a dead cat in my family without hitting a preacher of some type, and I come from a BIG family. Not only am I a PK, but my grandfather, four uncles, brother, two brothers-in-law, one sister-in-law, and two nephews-in-law are are ordained ministers in one denomination or another. This doesn't count the number of cousins I have who are ministers. Another brother-in-law is a choir director, as was I until about six months ago.

 

I grew up in the Pentecostal Holiness church, but most of my family (father included) are now in the Methodist or Baptist church. The last church where I served was a Presbyterian church.

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Words cannot express the loathing I have for the uniquely Christian thoughts -- I am right there with Nietsche, Mencken, and Ingersoll. So, what does a guy like me do when I want to support my parents but want to undermine what they do?

Could you go with this approach: let them do their Xtian thing but at the same time be honest about your convictions when the subject comes up? Works for me because I'm lazy.

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I was wondering if there are any other MK's or PK's out there? :shrug:

 

Hi, my parents are missionaries and have been since before I was born. I grew up in Africa, and my parents are still working there, infecting African minds with the Christian cognitive virus ("divine destructive retribution," "penal substitutionary atonement," "justification by faith soteriology"). My sister and her husband are doing the same thing now. :vent: What do you say to your parents: "I believe that you are an enemy of mankind"? "Christianity is a public curse and you should not share it with others"? "The Bible functions no differently than a common chain letter"? :eek: Words cannot express the loathing I have for the uniquely Christian thoughts -- I am right there with Nietsche, Mencken, and Ingersoll. So, what does a guy like me do when I want to support my parents but want to undermine what they do? :scratch:

 

Well, it's complicated...

 

But I'm sure that isn't a whole lot of help.

 

The way I deal with it is to evaluate people not on what they believe but on their overall quality as a person.

 

My mother, for example, is deeply religious (my father, a Lutheran minister, was deeply religious but has been in a home for alzheimer's patients for about 4 years no, so he's not deeply anything any more), but she's a quality person. She's okay with others having their beliefs, she treats everybody with respect, etc.

 

So, that's the question I have about your parents. It's not whether they are trying to convince people to believe - it's whether they are doing so in a manner that is conducive with those people being healthy humans, or whether they are doing so in a manner that makes them less healthy and happy.

 

If it's the latter, then I think your response ends up being, "I think that all people should be treated with respect and compassion - in ways that are most likely to give them long-term happiness - and I can't support what you are doing".

 

Hope that helps.

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Guest Shiva H. Vishnu

MK here. I was born in Spain and my sister in Morocco. We lived in Morocco until some time in my 5th year. Moved back to Indiana to live in a christian commune after that. My parents were involved with a missionary group called Youth With a Mission, or YWAM.

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Words cannot express the loathing I have for the uniquely Christian thoughts -- I am right there with Nietsche, Mencken, and Ingersoll. So, what does a guy like me do when I want to support my parents but want to undermine what they do?

Could you go with this approach: let them do their Xtian thing but at the same time be honest about your convictions when the subject comes up? Works for me because I'm lazy.

 

Won't that just bring more pain? They will never admit to being wrong. Won't that just make you a pariah in your own family? Do you have to bother telling them anything?

 

Just wondering.

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Words cannot express the loathing I have for the uniquely Christian thoughts -- I am right there with Nietsche, Mencken, and Ingersoll. So, what does a guy like me do when I want to support my parents but want to undermine what they do?

Could you go with this approach: let them do their Xtian thing but at the same time be honest about your convictions when the subject comes up? Works for me because I'm lazy.

 

Won't that just bring more pain? They will never admit to being wrong. Won't that just make you a pariah in your own family? Do you have to bother telling them anything?

 

Just wondering.

 

I think the honesty will mean less pain in the long run. But you're right- definitely more pain in the short run. Depending on the situation of course. I should feel thankful to be in a situation where people can generally "agree to disagree".

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I qualify as an mk, though I don't really think of myself that way. My dad was a doctor and my mom a nurse and they worked in public health on assignments in Thailand and India under the auspices of the Presbyterian church. Neither of them were preachers, though my mom could have been as she is very outgoing. The story is, my dad wanted to serve god but was very quiet and shy so decided to be a doctor and serve god that way.

 

I was born in the States though spent three years in India as a very young child when my parents were assigned there, so that is part of my formative experience. Otherwise, I was raised in the States. No, I wasn't a spoiled "doctor's daughter", as my parents didn't make much money when they were overseas and kept their frugal ways when they returned. We lived in a comfortable but not fancy house and they drove Fords and Volkswagens and bought me a new but cheap car when I was a high school senior. I didn't have a TV or stereo of my own until I moved out at age 19.

 

Other than shoving religion down my throat, they didn't preach to anyone else and treated patients with skill and compassion, regardless of their religion.

 

I haven't told my parents (actually my mom since my father passed away three years ago) that I have deconverted as I know she would not take it well and I know my fundy siblings would give me all kinds of crap if I told them. One brother is an agnostic but I don't trust him not to blab.

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Guest Jacob Pederson

My wife and I are both PKs and although my dad eventually reformed, her mom did not. That leaves us in a very difficult situation with our son, Elijah. Trying to keep that garbage out of his head without alienating the mother-in-law/youth-pastor is a difficult walk indeed. My personal feeling on the mater is if it requires alienation to get your point across then so be it.

 

For example, Elijah is currently at the end of a week-long stay with his religious relatives on the condition that he wasn’t dragged along to Sunday school. Of course, its not like you’re ever safe from that particular meme-virus . . . you’ve got your prayers at dinner time and your whatnot. However, missing Sunday school sure is a good start and sinks my point home that if he comes home infected, he won’t be going back for another visit.

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My wife and I are both PKs and although my dad eventually reformed, her mom did not. That leaves us in a very difficult situation with our son, Elijah. Trying to keep that garbage out of his head without alienating the mother-in-law/youth-pastor is a difficult walk indeed. My personal feeling on the mater is if it requires alienation to get your point across then so be it.

 

For example, Elijah is currently at the end of a week-long stay with his religious relatives on the condition that he wasn’t dragged along to Sunday school. Of course, its not like you’re ever safe from that particular meme-virus . . . you’ve got your prayers at dinner time and your whatnot. However, missing Sunday school sure is a good start and sinks my point home that if he comes home infected, he won’t be going back for another visit.

 

Would you allow him to go to sunday school later? Maybe after he understands, "lets pretend" better?

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Sort of a related topic - if your parents were American citizens and you were born overseas, be sure you have your birth certificate and other paperwork in order.

 

I overheard a conversation at work, I was in the lobby, where a recent retiree who was born in Italy of American parents was telling a friend of hers that she was having a terrible time getting her Social Security and company retirement benefits because some paperwork was missing.

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PK here - southern baptist - many years - and I've supported YWAM'ers and Wycliffe translators in my day

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