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Goodbye Jesus

The lighter moments of church life


Tyson

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When I about six years old I can recall the pastor holding up a turtle in the air. He was going on about the miracle of God’s creations when the turtle decided to take a nice long pee on the pastor’s robe. If I recall, even he thought that was funny.

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I used to go to this small private school, about 60 kids total.

I was the runt and all the older guys always bullied me, so I  avoided  playing football or any sports cuz all the guys thought it would be funny to gangup on me and tackle me or whatever.

So the pastor/ principle called  me into his office and told me I was a homosexual because I didnt like playing sports ( I was only in 7th grade!)

I  was crying when my mom picked me up from school.

 

Mom freaked out and went ballistic in front of the whole school. Yelling and screaming in a rage at the pastor.

 

I never went back to that school or church.

the next  day they put me in another private school and joined a different church.

 

HEHE! That could've been a South Park episode!

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