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An Easter Blessing


Aurelia
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I feel so great tonight! Without delving into details, it was necessary for me to attend an evangelism type meeting (disguised as an awards ceremony for my children) at a local church... It was nearly unbearable to sit through, but I kept my cool until after the salvation-invitation when the attendee-information (ie. "We would like to hound you later") cards were handed out... Everyone present was supposed to fill them out... Take one and pass it down the row....

 

I took three...

 

On the back of each of them I wrote: "Hi! I believe that God has a special message for you in Malachi 2:3. Happy Easter!"

 

I then stuck them in the front of 3 random pew bibles towards the front of the sanctuary.....

 

I feel really, really good right now.

 

~ Aurelia ~

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:lmao: Well done.
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*LOL* *applause!* Good going!

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Malachi 2:3 reads as follows:

 

"I will rebuke your offspring, and spread dung on your faces, the dung of your offerings, and I will put you out of my presence."

 

I guess you feel good. Probably these folks have never read that verse.

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On the back of each of them I wrote: "Hi! I believe that God has a special message for you in Malachi 2:3. Happy Easter!"

 

I then stuck them in the front of 3 random pew bibles towards the front of the sanctuary.....

 

:lmao:

 

:3:

 

:fdevil:

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Malachi 2:3 reads as follows:

 

"I will rebuke your offspring, and spread dung on your faces, the dung of your offerings, and I will put you out of my presence."

 

I guess you feel good. Probably these folks have never read that verse.

 

 

Typical fundie's copout: You're just taking that out of context.

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The appalling thing is that a supposed "holy book" contains such a line in the first place...

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Heehee.

That's funny.

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Malachi 2:3 (New Life Version)

New Life Version (NLV)

Copyright © 1969 by Christian Literature International

 

3 I will speak sharp words to your children. I will spread animal waste on your faces, the waste of your special suppers. And you will be taken away with it.

 

***

Malachi 2:3 (Contemporary English Version)

Contemporary English Version (CEV)

Copyright © 1995 by American Bible Society

 

3I will punish your descendants and rub your faces in the manure from your animal sacrifices, and then be done with you. [a]

 

***

Malachi 2:3 (New International Version - UK)

New International Version - UK (NIVUK)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

 

 

3 Because of you I will rebuke your descendants; I will spread on your faces the offal from your festival sacrifices, and you will be carried off with it.

 

***

 

I wonder which version of the Bible they use. Each has a different feel.

 

Malachi 2:3 (Robbobrob version)

Copyright : 2007

 

3 I hate your children. You are a shithead. Your feasts suck. I hope you get carried off and beaten senseless (Yes, I know being beaten sesneless is redundant, but what the Hell).

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The appalling thing is that a supposed "holy book" contains such a line in the first place...

 

Hehe yeah I know :P Just for laugh the other day I was reading out of Songs of Solomon to my gf and she was astounded that children could read that kind of crap in the bible... Good thing I didn't start reading Deuteronomy :P

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