Jump to content
Goodbye Jesus

This Idea Is So Brilliant... It's A Miracle


Mongo

Recommended Posts

Xtians are constantly talking about miracles. "Birth is a miracle." "It didn't rain today." "My alergies are gone."

 

This kind of non-thinking assignation of natural and coincidental events to the supernatural will never go away. Xtians currently have carte blanche for referring to miracles without having to explain the nuances of what they really mean. The word has lost its true meaning and yet it still confers credit to god.

 

The only way for us to blunt the term is for us to assimilate it into our non-believing culture and in effect render it as trivial.

 

By trivializing the term, we will force them to use other terms that clearly indicate intervention by god.

 

With time, the definition would include:

Miracle noun:

-an event that an individual finds difficult to understand. e.g. "How he survived a 12 story fall is a miracle."

-an event with with high odds or unlikely to occur. e.g. "John winning the lottery was a miracle."

 

Mongo

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Xtians are constantly talking about miracles. "Birth is a miracle." "It didn't rain today." "My alergies are gone."

 

This kind of non-thinking assignation of natural and coincidental events to the supernatural will never go away. Xtians currently have carte blanche for referring to miracles without having to explain the nuances of what they really mean. The word has lost its true meaning and yet it still confers credit to god.

 

The only way for us to blunt the term is for us to assimilate it into our non-believing culture and in effect render it as trivial.

 

By trivializing the term, we will force them to use other terms that clearly indicate intervention by god.

 

With time, the definition would include:

Miracle noun:

-an event that an individual finds difficult to understand. e.g. "How he survived a 12 story fall is a miracle."

-an event with with high odds or unlikely to occur. e.g. "John winning the lottery was a miracle."

 

Mongo

 

Actually, you're missing the truth here.

 

It's code.

 

It quite litterally means, 'I do not have the ability to comprehend...' Not an uncomon feeling, even in most atheist. This is just the catholic way of saying 'I can't explain that', the negative portion added for catholics being 'it must be GOD!'

 

It's taking a resonable point to an illogical conclusion. Just to save time and effort.

 

No, I mean, -really-.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

(Moving the topic away from Arena)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't forget about god's plan. Miracle is generally used for unexplainable good events, while god's plan is usually used for unexplainable bad events.

 

Eg. So-and-so's brother's cousin's roommate died in a freak accident? Well, it must have been god's plan.

 

Hurricane Katrina? 9/11? God's plan.

 

Surviving Hurricane Katrina? Miracle.

 

Here's where it gets dicey, as in Christianese, many things can be both god's plan and miracles.

 

Oh? Your roommate committed suicide and started a fire? God's plan. Must've been; he was both agnostic and depressed and heaven forbid god actually cure him of his mental illness and convert him, no, he must go to hell instead. God's plan.

 

You survived? Miracle. Even though you woke up due to the laws of physics (a window breaking from too much air pressure and heat), it was a miracle. Why? Cause We Say So.

 

Now, we can trivialize such things to the point such as: What? Your pencil lead broke while you were writing a post-it note? Must've been god's plan. Your friend had a spare pencil? Miracle. Toilet paper in the bathroom out? God's plan. You found kleenex in your purse because you happen to always carry it with you? Miracle.

 

(Although there are probably Christians who do use those terms in such ways, it would have seemed really odd to me when I was Christian to do so.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't forget about god's plan. Miracle is generally used for unexplainable good events, while god's plan is usually used for unexplainable bad events.

 

Eg. So-and-so's brother's cousin's roommate died in a freak accident? Well, it must have been god's plan.

 

Hurricane Katrina? 9/11? God's plan.

 

Surviving Hurricane Katrina? Miracle.

 

Here's where it gets dicey, as in Christianese, many things can be both god's plan and miracles.

 

Oh? Your roommate committed suicide and started a fire? God's plan. Must've been; he was both agnostic and depressed and heaven forbid god actually cure him of his mental illness and convert him, no, he must go to hell instead. God's plan.

 

You survived? Miracle. Even though you woke up due to the laws of physics (a window breaking from too much air pressure and heat), it was a miracle. Why? Cause We Say So.

 

Now, we can trivialize such things to the point such as: What? Your pencil lead broke while you were writing a post-it note? Must've been god's plan. Your friend had a spare pencil? Miracle. Toilet paper in the bathroom out? God's plan. You found kleenex in your purse because you happen to always carry it with you? Miracle.

 

(Although there are probably Christians who do use those terms in such ways, it would have seemed really odd to me when I was Christian to do so.)

 

Amethyst - that's a really powerful post. Made me feel like crying and then laughing as you moved from the serious to the trivial.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Amethyst - that's a really powerful post. Made me feel like crying and then laughing as you moved from the serious to the trivial.

 

Thanks. That is how modern-day Christians talk to people about stuff, though. And it's so incredibly annoying at times. Why can't they just think logically?

 

I have an idea. Why don't we build a web dictionary page translating Christianese to normal English and include all the common catch phrases that Christians use? Do it in a humorous way, but yet in a way that points out the irrationality of such words.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Amethyst - that's a really powerful post. Made me feel like crying and then laughing as you moved from the serious to the trivial.

 

Thanks. That is how modern-day Christians talk to people about stuff, though. And it's so incredibly annoying at times. Why can't they just think logically?

 

I have an idea. Why don't we build a web dictionary page translating Christianese to normal English and include all the common catch phrases that Christians use? Do it in a humorous way, but yet in a way that points out the irrationality of such words.

 

Like this? I wrote this in an earlier post. These are the 4 spiritual laws.

 

 

1. God has a plan for you.

 

2. You, and every human, is a sinner.

 

3. Jesus is the only provision for man's sin.

 

4. Everyone must receive Jesus, [as Saviour.]

 

Think of them as brainwashing upkeep activities.

 

They translate into reality-speak like this.

 

1. You belong to the church.

 

2. You are naughty, and dirty.

 

3. You'll burn forever without us.

 

4. Listen to everything we say, and aquire new members.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Like this? I wrote this in an earlier post. These are the 4 spiritual laws.

 

That would be a great start!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great posts ladies!

 

Here is my take on it...

 

A guy is in Oral Roberts hospital and gets a visit from his xtian doctor.

Doctor: I have news about god's will and news about a miracle.

Patient: Tell me about god's will

Doctor: You were in an accident and we had to amputate both your legs.

Patient: Praise the Lord! What's the miracle?

Doctor: The guy in the next bed has made a pretty good offer on your slippers.

 

Mongo

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:lmao: I'll try to remember that one.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If there is one thing I hate the most about fundamentalist people, it's them saying things like "Oh dear, it's really a miracle that after the rape of my daughter, he didn't destroy her clothes and look, he's Christian!" What the fuck, your daughter got raped but you're happy that the rapist didn't destroy her clothes and the fact that rapist is Christian? Saying it's a miracle is extremely trivalizing and perputating the unworthiness of people in the eyes of God. That's what most of Christianese is full of, trivalizing things, attributing things to Divine providence and being inapporiate about things.

 

If I was God, I'd shake my head and vaporize these miraclin' Fundies!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There actually is a Xianese "dictionary" of sorts out there, on the the ReligiousTolerance.org site. (Link is here.)

 

I think my favorite language quirk is the fundiegelical application of the word "lifestyle." As in atheist lifestyle, homosexual lifestyle, etc. Fundies really do use a different dictionary from everybody else...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There actually is a Xianese "dictionary" of sorts out there, on the the ReligiousTolerance.org site. (Link is here.)

 

I think my favorite language quirk is the fundiegelical application of the word "lifestyle." As in atheist lifestyle, homosexual lifestyle, etc. Fundies really do use a different dictionary from everybody else...

 

The word that always gives me the willies is 'conversation'....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Florida
Fundies really do use a different dictionary from everybody else...

 

Yes... it's called "The Dictionary for Zombies."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Surely that's 'Necronomicon'? ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Florida
Surely that's 'Necronomicon'? ;)

Yes... adding maybe a Necrosaurus and plenty of illustrations of proper brain devouring techniques.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The word that always gives me the willies is 'conversation'....

 

It's been 20some years now. I don't recall a special usage of 'conversation'. Is that a British thing?

 

Mongo

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It seems to be an Emergent thing... the word 'conversation' seems to be Right-Speak for 'proselytize' by making Jesus seem relevant to the person being spoken to, while not seeming to sell. For no good reason, I associate it with Alpha Course training.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It seems to be an Emergent thing... the word 'conversation' seems to be Right-Speak for 'proselytize' by making Jesus seem relevant to the person being spoken to, while not seeming to sell. For no good reason, I associate it with Alpha Course training.

A guy at work 'sells' the alpha course.

 

I'll keep and open ear. Thanks.

 

Mongo

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It seems to be an Emergent thing... the word 'conversation' seems to be Right-Speak for 'proselytize' by making Jesus seem relevant to the person being spoken to, while not seeming to sell. For no good reason, I associate it with Alpha Course training.

A guy at work 'sells' the alpha course.

 

I'll keep and open ear. Thanks.

 

Mongo

 

 

LOL

 

just smack him upside the head if he uses it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.