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Goodbye Jesus

Recalling Funny Events While Still A Christian


Tyson

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I have stated on a few occasions that if you want comedy material, visit a church, but not just any church; visit a black church.

 

I am from the Caribbean and many of our churches are of the Pentecostal, Baptist ilk and as black people we just love to express our emotions so both of those types of organizations appeals to us because they gives us an excuse to actually have jam sessions in the "name of Jesus." Oh the things I have seen when people are "in the spirit." We black folks just takes it to a whole other level. This is not to say you don't have white folks in Appalachia playing around with snakes cannot hold their own, however.

 

Also, I would not mind if you guys can point me to televangelists that you find hilarious. To amuse myself I sometimes flip the television on to "Christian" programming on Sundays and just laugh, shake my head and wonder to myself how the hell I used to actually believe all that shit.

 

Come on. Share!

 

Thanks.

 

 

Oh, for your amusement, watch the two clips below:

 

 

Click HERE

 

 

and

 

 

HERE

 

 

NOTE: In the second clip you do not have to watch all of it, just the first minute where this guy comes flying out of nowhere on to some lady's head. He is actually the choir director.

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I have stated on a few occasions that if you want comedy material, visit a church, but not just any church; visit a black church.

 

I am from the Caribbean and many of our churches are of the Pentecostal, Baptist ilk and as black people we just love to express our emotions so both of those types of organizations appeals to us because they gives us an excuse to actually have jam sessions in the "name of Jesus." Oh the things I have seen when people are "in the spirit." We black folks just takes it to a whole other level. This is not to say you don't have white folks in Appalachia playing around with snakes cannot hold their own, however.

 

Also, I would not mind if you guys can point me to televangelists that you find hilarious. To amuse myself I sometimes flip the television on to "Christian" programming on Sundays and just laugh, shake my head and wonder to myself how the hell I used to actually believe all that shit.

 

Come on. Share!

 

Thanks.

 

 

Oh, for your amusement, watch the two clips below:

 

 

Click HERE

 

 

and

 

 

HERE

 

 

NOTE: In the second clip you do not have to watch all of it, just the first minute where this guy comes flying out of nowhere on to some lady's head. He is actually the choir director.

 

 

MORE

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I have stated on a few occasions that if you want comedy material, visit a church, but not just any church; visit a black church.

 

I am from the Caribbean and many of our churches are of the Pentecostal, Baptist ilk and as black people we just love to express our emotions so both of those types of organizations appeals to us because they gives us an excuse to actually have jam sessions in the "name of Jesus." Oh the things I have seen when people are "in the spirit." We black folks just takes it to a whole other level. This is not to say you don't have white folks in Appalachia playing around with snakes cannot hold their own, however.

 

Also, I would not mind if you guys can point me to televangelists that you find hilarious. To amuse myself I sometimes flip the television on to "Christian" programming on Sundays and just laugh, shake my head and wonder to myself how the hell I used to actually believe all that shit.

 

Come on. Share!

 

Thanks.

 

 

Oh, for your amusement, watch the two clips below:

 

 

Click HERE

 

 

and

 

 

HERE

 

 

NOTE: In the second clip you do not have to watch all of it, just the first minute where this guy comes flying out of nowhere on to some lady's head. He is actually the choir director.

 

 

MORE

 

 

And still MORE

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I am assuming most of you will not understand what this person is saying (he is speaking in Jamaican patois), but the video tells you the whole story. Watch it

.

 

The song is called Church Heathen by Jamaican dancehall artist, Shaggy. Enjoy.

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I have stated on a few occasions that if you want comedy material, visit a church, but not just any church; visit a black church.

 

I am from the Caribbean and many of our churches are of the Pentecostal, Baptist ilk and as black people we just love to express our emotions so both of those types of organizations appeals to us because they gives us an excuse to actually have jam sessions in the "name of Jesus." Oh the things I have seen when people are "in the spirit." We black folks just takes it to a whole other level. This is not to say you don't have white folks in Appalachia playing around with snakes cannot hold their own, however.

 

Also, I would not mind if you guys can point me to televangelists that you find hilarious. To amuse myself I sometimes flip the television on to "Christian" programming on Sundays and just laugh, shake my head and wonder to myself how the hell I used to actually believe all that shit.

 

Come on. Share!

 

Thanks.

 

 

Oh, for your amusement, watch the two clips below:

 

 

Click HERE

 

 

and

 

 

HERE

 

 

NOTE: In the second clip you do not have to watch all of it, just the first minute where this guy comes flying out of nowhere on to some lady's head. He is actually the choir director.

 

I come from the heart of Southern West Virginia and I also come from these type of holy rollin', tongue talkin', pentecostal type churches. Even though I no longer affiliate myself with any type of church I do have a fondness for this type of worship. This type of worship is what opened my eyes to blending the practice of Witchcraft with my love for the Trinity. Since the beginning of time many religions have used this type of worship. Shamans have used music and dance to bring about a trance like state to bring them closer to their God(s) and/or Godess(es). Native American Indians have also used music and dance to bring about a trance like state to hear from the Great Spirit. Many religions in Africa also use such practices. Vodou is another that uses music and dance to bring about trance like states. Such behavior is NOT exclusive to "black churches" or "Appalachian snake handling churches." And that comment about the Appalachia's and snake handlers is totally uncalled for. It's so stereotypical and so not true. Anyway, because of such practices in holy rollin churches I was able to see the practice of magick (not magic) and how it's not really wrong to practice witchcraft but rather it's the intent that makes it right or wrong.

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I have stated on a few occasions that if you want comedy material, visit a church, but not just any church; visit a black church.

 

I am from the Caribbean and many of our churches are of the Pentecostal, Baptist ilk and as black people we just love to express our emotions so both of those types of organizations appeals to us because they gives us an excuse to actually have jam sessions in the "name of Jesus." Oh the things I have seen when people are "in the spirit." We black folks just takes it to a whole other level. This is not to say you don't have white folks in Appalachia playing around with snakes cannot hold their own, however.

 

Also, I would not mind if you guys can point me to televangelists that you find hilarious. To amuse myself I sometimes flip the television on to "Christian" programming on Sundays and just laugh, shake my head and wonder to myself how the hell I used to actually believe all that shit.

 

Come on. Share!

 

Thanks.

 

 

Oh, for your amusement, watch the two clips below:

 

 

Click HERE

 

 

and

 

 

HERE

 

 

NOTE: In the second clip you do not have to watch all of it, just the first minute where this guy comes flying out of nowhere on to some lady's head. He is actually the choir director.

 

I come from the heart of Southern West Virginia and I also come from these type of holy rollin', tongue talkin', pentecostal type churches. Even though I no longer affiliate myself with any type of church I do have a fondness for this type of worship. This type of worship is what opened my eyes to blending the practice of Witchcraft with my love for the Trinity. Since the beginning of time many religions have used this type of worship. Shamans have used music and dance to bring about a trance like state to bring them closer to their God(s) and/or Godess(es). Native American Indians have also used music and dance to bring about a trance like state to hear from the Great Spirit. Many religions in Africa also use such practices. Vodou is another that uses music and dance to bring about trance like states. Such behavior is NOT exclusive to "black churches" or "Appalachian snake handling churches." And that comment about the Appalachia's and snake handlers is totally uncalled for. It's so stereotypical and so not true. Anyway, because of such practices in holy rollin churches I was able to see the practice of magick (not magic) and how it's not really wrong to practice witchcraft but rather it's the intent that makes it right or wrong.

 

Hey hold on there a sec Valkyrie. I'm not that ignorant to not know that such behavior is not exclusive to "black churches" or those in Appalachia. It was said in jest to make a point partly because I know that while I was poking fun at my own people in [some] of their churches someone might have come in here to say, "well that kind of stuff is not exclusive to black churches because there are some predominantly white churches where this can be found, some Appalachian churches being an example" so it is NOT entirely untrue.

 

In any event, it was not meant to be THAT serious as I started this thread just for kicks and for kicks only. I suspect that most of us are intelligent enough to realize that.

 

Your other points are duly noted and appreciated but I'm looking for laughs. Got any? You never had brother Harry drop kick you during a holy spook moment?

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