Help A Sheltered Exchristian

[Pariah]

Hey everybody. A couple years back (wow, has it been that long?) these forums helped me through a very confusing time in my life; being inbetween Christianity and atheism.

Hopefully you guys can help me again with some new complications in my recovery from Christianity.

 

So I finally graduated from my Christian high school in June. It was hard, let me tell you, especially the last semester where I was forced to take a subject specifically designed to brainwash us as a last ditch effort before we entered the secular world (they even admitted this). "Interdisciplinary Studies" they called it. Long story short, if anyone ever tries to make me read anything by C.S. Lewis again I swear I will fucking kill them.

 

So I've graduated high school. I've also moved away from my Christian parents and into the dorms of my secular college. Woo! The sense of finally finding some freedom is great. Many of my classmates are atheists like me, and about once a week we end up having a discussion about why Christianity is nonsense in my politics class.

 

But here's where my problem comes in. I'm having a wee bit of culture shock, and even after more than two months I'm still having trouble. For example, this Halloween I was totally lost, having never been allowed to celebrate Halloween before. I've gone to Christian schools all my life, and until last year when I got a job in fast food I haven't really been around non-Christians all that much. I feel like I'm lost in a totally different world than the one I grew up in, and if I could just adjust to this new world I could finally be happy. Luckily, I have an awesome older roomie who has recongnized my naivety without me having to tell him the entire story of my life. He seems determined to help me out, but only to a certain extent.

 

One of my main problems is with college drinking culture. My parents were Wesleyans and so I grew up almost completely sheltered from alcohol. I got drunk for the first time this labor day a couple of days after moving out and now I drink about once a week with my roommate and sometimes my neighbors. But I know almost nothing about alcohol except snippets from movies and Wikipedia.

 

There are a lot of traditions surrounding alcohol that . For example, around here it is a tradition for one to go to the nearby town on one's 18th birthday and get drunk in a bar (the drinking age here is 19, but beside us is 18). I never got to do this because when I turned 18 I still lived with my teatotalitarian parents. So now my roommate wants to take me to a bar in said town sometime soon, assuming that I like everyone else have partaken in this most sacred milestone. But I've never set foot in a bar and I have no idea about what to order, what to do with myself, how to get home while drunk, etc.

 

So that's just one of my problems adjusting to my new secular life. Hopefully you guys can tell me a bit about bars in general and how they work, or alcohol/partying, or anything else a sheltered ex-Christian college student might need to know that you can think of.

 

Thanks,

Pariah

[mwc]

I think C.S. Lewis said it best when...

 

My best advice to you is don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. I know you want to fit in but going too far too fast is a stupid blow-it move. That said most bars serve beer and cheep beer is the drink of choice for college kids (at least it used to be and I don't think that has changed). If you don't have a plan to get home safe then you don't have a plan. Taking someone's word that they are a good driver while drunk assures you will die. Make a better plan than this since you're looking out for your own life. Someone is a dedicated driver, a taxi or call to get someone to pick you up (no questions leaving you high and dry). Again, don't trust a drunk guy to gage their ability. Watch a few drunks and you'll understand why I say that.

 

Anyhow, maybe you want to be the driver for your friends a time or two to see just how things are and then make your decision after that?

 

mwc

[1oddmanout]

I think C.S. Lewis said it best when...

 

If you don't have a plan to get home safe then you don't have a plan. Taking someone's word that they are a good driver while drunk assures you will die. Make a better plan than this since you're looking out for your own life. Someone is a dedicated driver, a taxi or call to get someone to pick you up (no questions leaving you high and dry). Again, don't trust a drunk guy to gage their ability. Watch a few drunks and you'll understand why I say that.

 

Anyhow, maybe you want to be the driver for your friends a time or two to see just how things are and then make your decision after that?

 

mwc

Great advice. Don't even be in a car where someone has been drinking. After leaving the joint, I had to attend Very Expensive alcohol treatment programs; SO many young guys whose lives were messed up;no transportation, no inusrance, etc. Now that I'm older, not drinking at all, as a personal choice, sounds like a wise plan.

[Skiergirl24]

I never drank until I got to college and you know what...a lot of people are in the same boat. Maybe you should tell your friends about your history? I highly doubt they would hold it against you! My advice to you is to take it slowly...if you have never drank before you will get drunk quickly. Order different drinks to see what you like. Be careful of shots as they will get you drunk very quickly! Drinking is a lot of fun but always be careful. Like someone else said - don't ride in a car with anyone who has been drinking. Plan ahead...if you know you will all be drinking leave your cars at home and take a taxi or public transportation.

[SWIM]

Just be careful not to fall in love with drinking and become an alcholic. It can happen easy, especially if drinking "fills some purpose" like helping you cope, or unwind or something.

 

You will know you are starting to have a problem when you find yourself drinking alone. It starts out innocent, but if you are naive like you say, about drinking, take it from someone who has a wife that's been through AA and still drinks, it can trap you and become a crutch. I still drink occasionally, but I try not to let it get out of hand.

[Ouroboros]

Pariah,

 

Don't mix your drinks. Like don't drink red wine and long drinks (like sweet/flavored martinis). Somehow the different kinds of alcohol just don't like each other, and you get a lot worse hangover from it. Another thing, drink water, and drink water, and drink water. Another reason you get hangover, dehydration. Another thing, if you eat a bit before you drink, you won't get as buzzed.

 

When it comes to what you should drink, you have to test a bit before you find what you like. Moderation is the keyword. When you learned your limits, there's no need to ever, ever really get drunk. Some people like getting drunk, some people never know what their limits are and don't know when they get drunk, but personally, I hate it. I like drinking a little to get a buzz, but that's it. I'm done and the rest of the night I drink water.

 

A quick lowdown of the drinks:

 

Wine, red or white, kind of sophisticated way of drinking. It's better to learn what a good wine is and drink the better quality ones, than to waste your time and money on cheap ones... unless it's a cheap AND good one.

 

Whiskey, Cognac, Bourboun, Scotch: very strong drinks. Drink it highlander style with a splash of water in it, or on the rocks (with ice). This can give bad headache in the morning.

 

Beer: well, beer is beer. Tap or bottle, your choice. Ale, light, dark...

 

Martinis: vodka martini or gin martini, with or without olives etc.

 

Long drinks: mixed martinis of 1001 different kinds. Famous and popular ones: lemon drop, apple martini, cosmo. If you want to for one of the motherloads of long drinks: long island ice tea - one is enough for an evening, and you better eat something first because this got vodka, tequila, gin and rum all togheter... I used to make a killer one. Everyone loved it, but they hated me the next day...

 

Then there's a lot of other drinks too, it was just a quick tour. FYI, I grew up in similar situation. No alchohol. My first drink I had at 31. At times it got out of hand, but now I'm good with it. A beer in the evening, that's it. (And I will probably do that less too) And something stronger only once a month.

[SWIM]

One more thing to add to han's reply, SWEET drinks give you the worst hangover. And drinks with tomato juice causes acid reflux (in me anyway).

[Ouroboros]

One more thing to add to han's reply, SWEET drinks give you the worst hangover. And drinks with tomato juice causes acid reflux (in me anyway).

Yup. And I think it's related to the sugar, but I haven't heard or read anything that proves it. That's what everyone says.

 

Actually I have some experience where I made drinks mixed with juice and different sweeteners and they do tend to be worse on the head, while the pure vodka or non-mixed martini is easier to take. Some whiskey-s are worse than others too, also might be related to the sugar content. Some red wines can do it too, but that is probably related to which grape they use or how they've processed it. Maybe it's the sulfur?

[Amethyst]

I would say just because you're not fundy anymore doesn't mean you absolutely have to go get drunk, although some people certainly do because alcohol was the forbidden fruit to them. Making anything a forbidden fruit is, IMO, dangerous because it sets people up for binges. It's why most diets fail.

 

Anyway I drink in moderation when I do drink, but there are periods of time where I go without drinking for weeks. And I prefer wine, not beer, unless the beer in question is the good German stuff. Both beer and wine have been shown to have antioxidants and can actually be beneficial in moderation.

[Dave]

.....So that's just one of my problems adjusting to my new secular life. Hopefully you guys can tell me a bit about bars in general and how they work, or alcohol/partying, or anything else a sheltered ex-Christian college student might need to know that you can think of.

One thing to remember is moderation. Don't play any of those drinking games; too much alcohol in a short period can kill you. It happens more often than you think. It is true a glass of wine, a shot of booze, and a glass of beer all contain the same amount of alcohol.

 

As to what to order? I like Galliano and cream. I may have one or two of those and then I get a Roy Rogers or a Virgin Mary. They contain no alcohol. You can always order a plain soda.

 

Above all, you do not have to get drunk to have a good time. Getting drunk only makes the other drunks more tollerable.

[Ouroboros]

Getting drunk only makes the other drunks more tollerable.

So very true!

[Skiergirl24]

Long Island Iced Teas......yowza. If you drink those then be prepared to spend the next day paying your respects to the great, white, porcelain god!

 

If you do get drunk you will have horrific bowel issues the next day...gas, the runs...the whole nine yards. At least that has been my experience.

 

I used to drink shots and gross stuff in college. Now my drink of choice is a nice glass of Chardonnay.

[Pariah]

Thanks for the advice so far guys. I don't think I have to worry about drunk driving, not many people I know have cars and as far as I know none of my friends drunk drive.

 

I've never actually had a hangover, except for minor joint pain the next day. But no throwing up, headaches, spins, etc. Even after mixing different alcohols too. Am I just lucky? I get drunk really easily though.

 

So can someone tell me how bars work? Do you usually pay only when you leave? How much are you supposed to tip? Do you order specifically or generally (do you ask for a beer or a Coors Light)?

Maybe I'm overthinking this...

 

I never drank until I got to college and you know what...a lot of people are in the same boat. Maybe you should tell your friends about your history? I highly doubt they would hold it against you!

 

I would if it was something I had chosen for myself, but its just tied to too many things which I don't want to go into detail about when I'm first getting to know someone. Like my Christian schooling and my problems with my parents.

 

There might be cultural differences here, I'm Canadian. Are you talking about America? Because America's higher drinking age might keep more teens from drinking than here where the drinking age is 18/19.

 

Some people like getting drunk, some people never know what their limits are and don't know when they get drunk, but personally, I hate it. I like drinking a little to get a buzz, but that's it.

 

How drunk do you have to be before you've moved from "buzzed" to "drunk"?

 

My interest in drinking is more about trying new things than just seeing how fast I can make myself blackout. Maybe theres a bit of that whole forbidden fruit thing too...

 

It is true a glass of wine, a shot of booze, and a glass of beer all contain the same amount of alcohol.

 

Really? What percentages alcohol are we talking here? I'm the type who gets a buzz after only one beer, so one beer and a shot would make me doubly drunk?

[Rhia]

Whatever you feel most comfortable with is up to you, just make sure you eat healthy and drink tons of water. I personally don't drink much at all (a few sips here and there), not because I'm uber-conservative and think it's "evil", but because if I have even more than a sip at a time of anything alcoholic (including ny-quil), I fall asleep, and that's never conducive to a good "party scene".

[Ouroboros]

How drunk do you have to be before you've moved from "buzzed" to "drunk"?

That's probably different for different people. I can tell three different stages personally, but I know people that don't know when to stop. They probably don't notice the small changes, but also they're the ones that can drink until blacking out and not remembering what happened. I can't. When I get to the drunk level, I can't go further. I will be praying to the porcelain god until it's all out if I do. You can only tell the differences by experience and by reactions from your friends and what they tell you next day.

[SWIM]

How drunk do you have to be before you've moved from "buzzed" to "drunk"?

That's probably different for different people. I can tell three different stages personally, but I know people that don't know when to stop. They probably don't notice the small changes, but also they're the ones that can drink until blacking out and not remembering what happened. I can't. When I get to the drunk level, I can't go further. I will be praying to the porcelain god until it's all out if I do. You can only tell the differences by experience and by reactions from your friends and what they tell you next day.

 

 

Personally a six pack of bud light will get me buzzed, a 12 pack will get me drunk. About 1/4 large bottle of crown royal will get me drunk.

 

On the otherhand, a six pack will cause my wife to get wasted, so it's different with different people.

 

Hangovers are bad because they dehydrate you. Drink lots of water the next day. It also robs you of nutrients, so V8 is great in the morning, it restores some of the lost nutrients. Don't take anything with tylonol in it, unless you take NAC to counteract it.

 

Got me some beer tonight, in the RV again. Maybe I'll hit the "Intoxicated thread" later. LOL aren't I a bad influence?

[decafaholic]

Wow, I'm so glad someone else is in the same boat!

 

haha, yes, I'm also weary of CS Lewis. I swear, Christians are going to adopt him into the trinity. "I baptise you in the name of the father, the son, the holy spirit, and C.S. Lewis, bless his holy name. LOL!

 

So, I did k-12 xtian school and then 3 semesters of christian college. Then I transferred to a state college where I currently am.

culture shock? Hell, yeah. Instead of being embarassed by my total lack of experience with porn, drugs, alcohol, sex, dating, etc, I just turn it into a joke. I love to tell stories where I have totally embarassed myself because of my naivete. they're hilarious! When I worked at a restaurant, I took an order for a Long Island Iced Tea and I aske dhte lady if she wanted it sweet or unsweet. yeah, people love that story!!

 

I ask all the questions I want and people are very eager to educate me. People love sharing their knowledge about alcohol, because it makes them look so much cooler, so I say feel free to ask your friends anything you want to know.

 

Also, seriously, don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. Even though I'm an atheist, I still leave parties when people start getting drunk, and if I know ahead of time that a lot of people are going to get drunk, I just don't go. I'm under the legal drinking age, so i don't go there, but i'm turning 21 next year and thinking about drinking for the first time. i don't know, but if I do decide to drink, I'll go with a friend who doesn't drink, ask for something that tastes really good with very little alcohol and just have a normal meal. I'll have to talk with my Dr though about how alcohol will mix with the Zoloft I'm taking.

 

Thanks again for the post! And hey, let us know how your first time goes!

[upstarter]

I'm amazed at the amount of practical advice this crowd has about drinking.

 

I'm also amazed how much I relate to your story. It's been a couple of decades since I left xtianity and entered college (and yes, the two things did begin at basically the same time). I remember the culture shock. I went from a town of 700 people to living in downtown Toronto. Went from very strict xtian home to a free for all of excess. That first term in Toronto I was just as often drunk on my own independence as I was drunk on alcohol. I'm honestly not sure how I got my school work done, what with the level of drinking I was doing.

 

My advice is just, don't overdo it. Even now in my 40s I like to indulge in a fun night of excess. But I remember how easy it was to go crazy when the shackles of xtianity were first removed. I also remember how baffling it all was. So, just watch what your friends do, in terms of tipping and paying and ordering. You'll catch on! And try to keep you head.

 

You are at the beginning of an amazing journey. Life has incredible things to offer you. You don't have to do it all before you're 25.

[white_raven23]

I'm not a big drinker either.

 

I really like MWC's advice on offering to be the designated driver. None of your friends will expect you to drink, so no pressure.

 

At a bar:

 

You are better off walking up to the bar and paying for each drink rather than sitting at a table and just having the waitress deliver them. THat way, you keep close track of 2 important things. True level of intoxication, and the amount of money you spend.

 

As for money, drinks are EXPENSIVE. If you pay for each one, you are aware just how much $ is leaving your pocket, and how fast. and NEVER run a "tab" if the bar offers it! Just don't do it! Going into debt is foolish enough, going into debt by going to bars is just sad.

 

As for the intoxication level: Getting up to go to the bar for each drink enables you to check your coordination (or lack thereof). The full effects of alcohol are never apparent until your blood is circulating the way it does during activity. Sitting on your ass just drinking....less blood flow. You may think you are holding your alcohol really well...until you stand up!

 

I have very low tolerance, and am a lightweight. My friends sometimes tease me, but I can always come back with "At least I spend less money to get a little buzz. You're just jealous."

 

I recognize 3 phases for me.

 

1 - I feel warm and mellow

 

2 - I feel detached, and my vision has to "catch up" a little when I turn my head

 

3 - Combine the sensations of 2 plus my words are slurred and I'm very giggly.

 

Now, I'm not willing to drive at 2 or obviously 3. There's even a spot midway between 1 and 2 where I'm more likely to ask someone else to drive, that slightly detached feeling....not a good idea. You want to be fully 'in the world' when you get behind the wheel.

 

Now, as for tolerance.... half a glass of wine will get me to 2 quick on an empty stomach. Wine with food....more like 3/4th of a glass will get me there (so not a big difference).

 

So....pre-bar advice....eat a big meal before going. Even if you plan to be the designated driver, plans could change, so have that big meal beforehand. You will also spend less money on bar snacks (which can also get pricey). Don't be content to sit at a table and let the waitress bring you drinks. Get up, go to the bar, and pay for each drink. This also increases your mingling opportunities. If someone sexy wants to talk to you, they are more likely to do it if you leave your table (and friends) to get your drink. They aren't going to come up to your table (and your friends) to flirt with you and risk getting shot down by you and your pals.

 

Most important.....NEVER let a "friend" push you to drink more than you want to. Real friends respect your boundaries and limits. Insecure alcoholics with the delusion that they don't really have a "problem" unless they are drinking alone do that to you. Not your friends.

[R. S. Martin]

You don't have to do it all before you're 25.

 

Excellent advice! I love that. Since we're talking about transitions from one culture to another, I'll share about mine.

 

I'm from Canada, too. I grew up in the horse and buggy community about an hour and a half west of Toronto. Not exactly a teetotaler community but basically so. I never saw anybody drunk. My brother had a wild streak when he was in his teens and got himself drunk but I never saw him in that condition. Just heard about it from others. What I want to get at is the teaching they drilled about how people will go wild if the rules of the church are removed. Or the shackles of Christianity, as someone called it.

 

Well, the day came when I was crowded out of the community. I was in my early 40s and needed more intellectual stimulation than my community allowed me. My sisters were allowed to be teachers (a position I desperately wanted and people knew it) but I wasn't. Ask them why I was rejected because they would never tell me. Anyway, my brain was atrophying and I was in desperate need of a better life by the time I hit my forties. Because no one let me do anything better than hoes gardens, scrub floors, etc. I broke all their rules, went to university, and when the church disapproved I left. And that is the point where, according to their teachings, I would automatically go wild and commit rape and theft, and possibly murder.

 

I listened closely to myself to see what I would do, whether I really would do those terrible things. I found that I had values deep down, that there were things I did not want on my record no matter what. I didn't really think there was a god--I wasn't sure about that and it wasn't terribly important, but I realized I had something worth far more than a god. I had a Self. And there were certain things I did not want on the record of my Self. Disrespect for other people was top of the list. Getting drunk was added later as something I didn't want on my record.

 

Then there's something else. Dress. This has more to do with comfort than with conscience. Changing my dress is traumatic for me. When I realized that I would have to change churches, I had half a dozen Mennonite churches to choose from, several of which had dress codes similar to the horse and buggy group I came from, each one progressively more "worldly" than the one before. Lots of people make the change gradually, moving up the ladder stage by stage, so to speak. I wanted a church that had no dress code so that I did not have to change my dress even a little. I went for the modern Mennonites who were "totally worldly" by horse and buggy standards. I share this to show that it is not necessary to do everything one is allowed to do.

 

I realize that you are in a very different situation from me. Also, I am more like decafaholic when it comes to dealing with my naivete. It's too difficult for me to try and hide my cultural differences so I capitalize on them. Sometimes this means patiently listening to something I already know very well, but more often than not it means I get people to oblige me just like they do anyone else who is new to the culture. And there are lots of internationals in this town.

 

I did experiment a little bit with alcohol. I had enough to find that I could become addicted to wine in short order and I don't want to be addicted to anything stronger than chocolate. People have looked at me and felt they should introduce me to the culture of alcohol but I tell them about my experience and resolution. That is all I need to do and they respect it. The dress thing has been more awkward. Several women have tried helping me make the transition. I felt obligated to try it. But when it really came to the point I couldn't do it.

 

I think it all boils down to what people on this thread are saying about alcohol and parties:

1. Don't do anything you're not comfortable doing.
   
2. You don't have to do something just because you have permission to do it.
   

[Dave]

So can someone tell me how bars work? Do you usually pay only when you leave? How much are you supposed to tip? Do you order specifically or generally (do you ask for a beer or a Coors Light)?

Maybe I'm overthinking this...

Pay as you go. Tip ahead of time and you get better service. You are overthinking this.

 

How drunk do you have to be before you've moved from "buzzed" to "drunk"?

If you have a buzz, you ARE drunk. Two to three drinks and your higher thinking functions, and motor skills, are gone for several hours.

 

My interest in drinking is more about trying new things than just seeing how fast I can make myself blackout. Maybe theres a bit of that whole forbidden fruit thing too...

I doubt that.

 

It is true a glass of wine, a shot of booze, and a glass of beer all contain the same amount of alcohol.

Really? What percentages alcohol are we talking here? I'm the type who gets a buzz after only one beer, so one beer and a shot would make me doubly drunk?

3 to 4 ounces of alcohol and no food will put you over the limit.

 

My advice; grow up before you play with adult toys. You don't seem to be there yet. That may sound rude and condescending.... but it's the truth. I was a volunteer coordinator for a drug and alcohol recovery program for ten years. I've seen lots of kids just like you in that program. Find something more constructive to do, like skydiving. Thousands of more drunks die ever year than do skydivers. It's a hell of a lot more fun too.

[white_raven23]

So can someone tell me how bars work? Do you usually pay only when you leave? How much are you supposed to tip? Do you order specifically or generally (do you ask for a beer or a Coors Light)?

Maybe I'm overthinking this...

Pay as you go. Tip ahead of time and you get better service. You are overthinking this.

 

No he's not overthinking at all. Strange thing to say to someone coming from a former rehab coordinator.

 

Not everyone who chooses to drink becomes an alcoholic. The ones who "overthink" even less so.

 

Pariah....ASK questions! Even stupid ones! There's no rule that drinking alcohol anywhere is mandatory (not even at a bar). Going out is supposed to be about having fun. For some people, "fun" is drinking until they puke....for other's "fun" is flinging themselves out of a perfectly good airplane.

 

Not everyone has the same definition of "fun". As for bars and drinking....I don't find being buzzed or drunk in a bar "fun" personally. I'm an introvert, so being vulnerable in public like that is highly stressful. I prefer getting buzzed or drunk with friends or family at my, or a close friend's home. No travel is involved. There's usually dinner, laughter, maybe movies, then everyone sleeps.

 

Do I do that every weekend? No. Every other weekend? No. More like every couple months or so. But that's just my preference.

 

You are entitled to your own sense of "fun". It doesn't have to involve alcohol, unless YOU want it to.

[♦ nivek ♦]

Pariah,

 

Simple solution that worked for me. "Don't drink *out*"

 

Go have a kickass time fucking around with your friends and buddies sans use of expensive and stupid alcohol.

Stick with the virgin drinks or soda and or mixers.

 

Want to find time to get a buzz on and get to puking wasted? Do so with the bottle at home, bathroom with shithouse or bathtub you can barf into handy.

 

Gets fuckin' expensive buying booze by the shot, bottle or glass *out*. Decent bottle of scotch, vodka, case of beers will get you decently buzzed without the premium of having to try to find way home safely.

 

If you don't drink to get buzzed *now*, take this little chestnut from a rationally recovered alcoholic, D O N ' T get hooked in the first place.

Your buddies peer pressure your ass into doing the party_all_the_time bullshit? Find better friends, or do without idiots on your list of folks you wanna hang around.

 

Alcohol loves you, will use you up, then when you can't take any of her any more, she'll wrap your ass and liver around a light pole at speed with no remorse.

 

It is your life, liver and choices. Making good choices now will not "kill the college experience". Grow the testicles to tell them to FOAD when they want you to go that one step past where you willingly would walk sober.

 

'tis yer life.

 

You won't be worth a shit sick or dead to those you care to love.

 

kFL

[Rev R]

My advice

 

1. Designated driver (stash some money for a long cab ride or hotel room...just in case do not touch this money at the bar)

2. Tip well!

3. Do not treat the bar as a buffet. Personally I recommend Scotch and Black and Tans .

4. Buy top shelf, the extra expense along with #2 will help you moderate your consumption.

5. Have fun. Hit the dance floor, heckle the band, heckle the dancers.

[Dave]

So can someone tell me how bars work? Do you usually pay only when you leave? How much are you supposed to tip? Do you order specifically or generally (do you ask for a beer or a Coors Light)?

Maybe I'm overthinking this...

Pay as you go. Tip ahead of time and you get better service. You are overthinking this.

 

No he's not overthinking at all. Strange thing to say to someone coming from a former rehab coordinator.

Something just doesn't sit right about his postings. They could be totally innocent and it could be me.... but something just doesn't sound right.

 

Not everyone who chooses to drink becomes an alcoholic. The ones who "overthink" even less so.

At no time did I say, or even hint about, "everyone" becoming an "alcoholic."