What Are You Doing For Xmas?

[Brother Jeff]

We've had a big family gathering here, which has been great. Good to be here, and wonderful to see everybody. I've had a great Kryasstmas too! And of course I Farted for Jesus and He farted too at the same time since He is somehow magically Me! Glory!

[Naughtyhamster]

I've had a great Kryasstmas too! And of course I Farted for Jesus and He farted too at the same time since He is somehow magically Me! Glory!

 

I need a big farting miracle! Bring me a sexy guy for the New Year, Sweet Farterman!

[1oddmanout]

I worked all this holiday season, allowing other folks some time off to be with families. Meh, we get double time and a half for working holidays. Finally, the weather cleared, and we got SOME passengers where they wanted to be. But I just HATE this damn holiday--I went home, trying to just buy some freaking salad at a grocery store, and all were closed; and all the fats (that was a typo, but so appropriate) food joints. Damn!! Found a new Chinese place open, so got some fried wontons and soup, and will watch a DVD-after of course, reading this forum.

[WCrystal]

Went to great-grandma's house last night, as EVERYONE on dad's side of the family does. The only reason I find myself going over there anymore is for good ol'e great-grandma. That old lady is cool, and she rocks. Anyways, they do some secret-santa crap every year, and without my consent, they throw my name in. So, I just go to the Wal-mart and buy a ten-dollar gift for whomever I got.

Anyways, yeah. It's not really a celebration of christmas, in the traditional sense. More of a family gathering, where some of the second cousins smoke pot in the den in the back with the door open for ventilation so the smell doesn't penetrate the rest of the house, while Drunkle Santa (usually my drunk and rowdy second cousin dresses up as santa for the young kids.. great idea, I know) comes in with a beat up suit (with a hole in the crotch, by the way) and makes a joke of the whole celebration.

 

Last night Drunkle Santa ended up passing out on the chair while my nephew sat on his lap. No shit. I ran to the bathroom to laugh my ass off 'cause I nearly pissed my pants laughing so hard. The second cousins who were tokin' in the back ended up tokin' so much that they were floating a foot off the ground when they left and one walked into the door panel. Dad got sick and threw up in the recycling bin.

 

Other than that, everything was alright. Great-grandma was cool. For some reason, every year she gives me money. It's alright though, she's a cool lady. One of the few family members I don't mind talking to. Funny thing is, I didn't have one drop of alcohol last night.

 

 

As for today, my mom is so crazed by the whole Christmas thing it's insanity on my part to not get her anything (unless I want to incur the wrath of shouting greedy mother). And she also tries to push that greed onto my two little sisters, which freaks me out. So, I just got my mom a gift card thing, and some things for the sisters. I hope they don't grow up to be like her.

 

Honestly, I really didn't want anything but for our family to "not fight" for one gathering. Well, I got my wish. And I'm happy.

 

Have a good.... rest of the night.

[RIPw4]

The snapping turtle is expensive so we have it only once a year.

 

Really? I catch them all the time.. So your saying that I can make money from snapping turtles? How many do you want. What poundage..

I have caught anywhere from little baby turtles to 80 pound snapping turtles.

Fill me in on this!

[MathGeek]

I had my first interesting Christmas in several years. First off, my wife works in the financial sector and she didn't get off work until an hour after she was supposed to. We drove 4 hours to see my grandparents and on the way, we fought over religion so same-old, same-old. We had a massive meal of turkey and ham and many trimmings. My grandmother is of Swedish ancestry, so she made rice pudding with lingonberries. I really liked it, but my father's warped sense of humor made him call the lingonberries "reindeer turds". Surprisingly, my father and I didn't tear strips out of each other on hot-button issues. My father and grandfather bemoaned the fact they couldn't get Rush Limbaugh's radio program on the local stations, so it was quite funny. On top of that, we drove back to my parents place to sleep off the turkey and ham hangover.

 

The next day, we drove an extra 1.5 hours to see my other grandparents. It was less eventful until my sister and her fiance arrived. My sister was searching through wedding magazines and she came across a brown dress that looked quite nice. My sister suggested to my mother that she should she wear that dress only in a lighter color. My mother had worn a pantsuit to my wedding and she wanted to repeat history. My sister argued with her until it finally culminated in my sister saying my mother would look like "the butch mother-in-law". Supposedly, the congregants would whisper wondering whether or not my mother had been divorced and was looking for a playmate on the other side of the fence. I was laughing like crazy since my sister has this ability to get fired up faster than a dry forest bed in the western USA. The night before, she was fired up by me and several other relatives on some legal issues. She is my father's daughter through and through.

 

After that, my wife and I drove another hour to make surprise visits to her family. I participated in a game called "Dirty Minds" where we dirty clues were given to things and ideas that weren't nasty. For example, "small pricks in a bush" means a rose. After a lasagna feast, opening more gifts, and surprising her grandmother, we drove 4.5 hours back to our home in western ND. Put bluntly, I am still recovering from this whirlwind exercise of sedintary excellence.

 

As for Christmas, I think I'll keep celebrating it and attending church if need be. I'll keep mum for a while yet on my religious stance. Fights like that aren't worth the effort. I didn't pray during the meals but I didn't broadcast that to anybody else. Where I live, politics and religion can be discussed, but living by the maxim of not discussing such issues is usually worth the discomfort in my opinion. If you can live with it, it's usually tthe best thing to do.

[Ouroboros]

Since I'm Swedish, we've celebrated christmas yesterday. We ate all the traditional swedish dishes: Ham, meatballs, potatoes, 50 different kinds of sausages, herring, salmon, cheeses, bread, ribs, meat prepared in different ways, fish, salads, rice porridge with cream and jam, sweet hot wine with almonds and raisins, cakes, cookies, fudge, nuts, dried figues, chocolates, coffe, fruit and a special sweet christmas brew called "julmust".

Sounds like a lot of good stuff. We do have julmust here too! We got it at Ikea. It's a new formula!? It tastes a bit different, but I like it. Not as sweet anymore.

[Emme]

Since I'm Swedish, we've celebrated christmas yesterday. We ate all the traditional swedish dishes: Ham, meatballs, potatoes, 50 different kinds of sausages, herring, salmon, cheeses, bread, ribs, meat prepared in different ways, fish, salads, rice porridge with cream and jam, sweet hot wine with almonds and raisins, cakes, cookies, fudge, nuts, dried figues, chocolates, coffe, fruit and a special sweet christmas brew called "julmust".

Sounds like a lot of good stuff. We do have julmust here too! We got it at Ikea. It's a new formula!? It tastes a bit different, but I like it. Not as sweet anymore.

 

I think it's the same (yesterday, today and tomorrow).

 

What did you have for christmas? Do you follow swedish traditions or american? Or both?

Anyway, hope you had a nice xmas, fellow swede!