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Guest like WOAH its Mia!

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Guest like WOAH its Mia!

Hey I'm new to the boards. I'm Mia and I'm 20. I'll try to post a more detailed testimony later, but basically this is how it happened:

 

grew up Jehovah's Witness>>started doubting>>got into wicca/buddism>>got disgusted with all religion>>became agnostic>>

met some cool christians when i went to college>>got sucked in and became "saved" last spring>>read two Jesus Freak books and got on fire>>

told my family about my conversion>>got excommunicated from their church (which entails not being able to speak to any of my friends and family)>>

had to move out of my house with no money or transportation>>stayed with friends till i met a nice christian couple to live with>>threw myself

into missions>>went off to university this past fall>>got disillusioned>>about this time a friend that was on the "leadership team" at one of the

campus ministries became agnostic>>i started having conversations with her>>i start having doubts again...

 

So now I'm agnostic and only two or three of my friends know. Everyon'e has been asking how I'm doing because I'm not doing missions this summer and they hardly ever see me at the Baptist Collegiate Ministry on campus anymore. I just make up little excuses about being busy. But eventually their gonna find out I guess. I went through a period of depression and anger because I feel like I've given up EVERYTHING for christianity, for religion. And now that I see it for what it is...I see what a waste this past year has been. I mean, I know I would've eventually had to get out of my house because of my family being in that cult...But here I thought I had found the truth, found "real" christianity, praying for my family everyday hoping they would see the truth about Jesus and get saved so they won't go to hell...

 

Now I just wish we hadn't been ripped about by religion. Religion has torn my family apart. I left because I thought I should be willing to give anything up for Jesus. And they have nothing to do with me because it's their cult's policy. They think they're doing the right thing.

 

So now I'm on my own with no clue what I'm gonna do. Last semester I was hanging out with my friends alot and going to the college worship services every week. Now I'm never over there and I haven't been to church in a few weeks. I just can't do it. I can't go and pretend I believe anymore. I remeber three weeks ago my agnostic friend (the one that deconverted) came with me to church and it was so funny while she was there, because we kept joking about things the preacher said that didn't make any sense. One of my strong christian friends was sitting beside me looking at us every 5 minutes. I think she knew what was going on. So she knows I'm agnostic and maybe two other friends know.

 

I guess I'm getting to the point where I'm not so angry anymore, but I'm frustrated and I know something's gotta give. My agnostic friend used to be on the leadership team for the college ministry, and she wrote a letter to the whole council explaining herself. I don't know if I can do that yet. I was thinking of telling a few choice friends if they keep asking what's up with me. It's better than lying or coming up with silly excuses...

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Hiya mia,

 

Welcome to ExC. Great to have another younger voice popping up and stopping in.

 

Good place to find a spot to settle in and enjoy company of other folks decanting after their religious messes.

 

kL

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Hi, Mia! Welcome to the forums.

 

One thing you might want to consider right now: Are there any vulnerabilities that might be attacked if you were to openly admit to your agnosticism? In particular, I'm thinking about the Christian couple you mentioned. Are you still living at their home, and would you be at risk of losing your lodgings if they knew your situation? If so, get a backup plan in place.

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Guest like WOAH its Mia!
Hi, Mia! Welcome to the forums.

 

One thing you might want to consider right now: Are there any vulnerabilities that might be attacked if you were to openly admit to your agnosticism? In particular, I'm thinking about the Christian couple you mentioned. Are you still living at their home, and would you be at risk of losing your lodgings if they knew your situation? If so, get a backup plan in place.

 

ya i'm worried about that too. that's why only a few people know. i don't know wut would happen if i told everyone...

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  • Super Moderator

Welcome, Mia!

 

Religion screws with families and all relationships. It's hard to move into a new mode, but it certainly can be done. You can find support right here because we've been through it, too, in varying degrees.

 

There is a whole new world of rational thought and you have just entered it. It's worth the cost. Things will get smoother in time.

 

- Chris

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Welcome to the forum. i hope you find your time here educational :>

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