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Mom: "wouldn't You Pray If I Was Terminally Ill?"


SilentLoner
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This has been repeatedly bugging me for a few days now.

 

About a week ago, my mom got a call from her friend requesting prayers for a girl from her church who had leukemia and had two failed bone marrow transplants. Then a few days ago, I'm working on my computer in the dining room when I overhear my mom talking to my brother about it, and how they're trying to find another treament method.

I mutter to myself: "What, prayers not working?"

Apparently I said it louder than I meant to or my mom has supersonic hearing, because she gets in my face about it. I try to drop the issue, but long story short she throws out the line: "If I were terminally ill, wouldn't you pray for me?"

I sit quiet, mostly becuase I can't believe she would ask me something like that. She knows I'm an atheist and don't believe in prayer above all things - I might as well have a goat sacrifice and get the same level of results. We've had fights over studies that prove prayer is innefective, she stubbornly holds onto this one decades old article that says it helps (oh well, old dog, new tricks I guess). Of course my answer is no, I don't believe in that "If you don't believe in that why did you get me that book then (The Secret)?

"Um, because I know you like that subject" (that and the fact that I had to buy something at the last minute).

Goes on for a few minutes and then she leaves the room.

 

Sorry for the rant, its just the usual over at my house.

 

Anyone gotten similar from family?

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I know where you are coming from. I don't pray either, and so when I get asked (usually online) to pray for someone, I kind of ignore it....if Iknow the person I will see if there is anything concrete I can do, but prayer really is a selfish activity...."God, treat my loved one better than you were planning because I say so."

 

Fits in the same catagory as those who praise God that their loved ones survived 9/11, which means God must have loved those people more than the ones God let die.....and this is supposed to be the just and merciful deity?!?

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The girl from church sounds like my brother, who has had one failed bone marrow transplant. Much as I am sure my parents would like to hear that I am praying to Bible God, I can't say something to them that isn't true. I would never pray to that monster. After all, God is all-powerful and all-loving, so why do these people get leukemia in the first place?

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This has been repeatedly bugging me for a few days now.

 

About a week ago, my mom got a call from her friend requesting prayers for a girl from her church who had leukemia and had two failed bone marrow transplants. Then a few days ago, I'm working on my computer in the dining room when I overhear my mom talking to my brother about it, and how they're trying to find another treament method.

I mutter to myself: "What, prayers not working?"

Apparently I said it louder than I meant to or my mom has supersonic hearing, because she gets in my face about it. I try to drop the issue, but long story short she throws out the line: "If I were terminally ill, wouldn't you pray for me?"

I sit quiet, mostly becuase I can't believe she would ask me something like that. She knows I'm an atheist and don't believe in prayer above all things - I might as well have a goat sacrifice and get the same level of results. We've had fights over studies that prove prayer is innefective, she stubbornly holds onto this one decades old article that says it helps (oh well, old dog, new tricks I guess). Of course my answer is no, I don't believe in that "If you don't believe in that why did you get me that book then (The Secret)?

"Um, because I know you like that subject" (that and the fact that I had to buy something at the last minute).

Goes on for a few minutes and then she leaves the room.

 

Sorry for the rant, its just the usual over at my house.

 

Anyone gotten similar from family?

 

My mother doesn't pray but if I said that within ear shot she'd have gone off on me for being insensitive. : shrug: Go figure

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I think a good answer might be, "If I were very ill, would you pray to Allah for me? How about Odin? Krishna?"

 

Why would one be expected to pray to a god he doesn't think even exists?

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I refused to let a local do-gooder minister pray for me before open heart surgery. That's how convinced I am that prayer is useless. Five years ago and still ticking.

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I refused to let a local do-gooder minister pray for me before open heart surgery. That's how convinced I am that prayer is useless. Five years ago and still ticking.

 

I bet he prayed anyway. You're lucky to be alive!

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In June 1998, I woke up one morning blind in my left eye. It clear up after about about three weeks and countless (and useless) visits to countless doctors. Years later, in hindsight (no pun intended), it turns out to have been the first recognizable symptom of multiple sclerosis.

 

Any way, at the time my mother (who was raised in Appalachia by rabid bible-thumpers but turned out to be less obnoxious than most fundies) said she'd pray for me and I said, "I don't think that will do any good."

 

She replied, "It won't do any harm." And I let it go at that.

 

This may sound weird but, in a way, I'm glad my mother died before I was diagnosed with MS. Otherwise, she'd be praying for me constantly — and constantly feeling horrible when her prayers continued to go unanswered.

 

These days, when someone says they'll pray for me, unless they're really aggressive about it, I simply say, "Thank you for thinking of me." I don't want to hurt the feelings of well-meaning people, but I refuse to dignify anything as useless as prayer by acknowledging it directly with a thank-you.

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I think a good answer might be, "If I were very ill, would you pray to Allah for me? How about Odin? Krishna?"

I'm praying for you right now. To all of them. Because I CARE! :HappyCry:

 

mwc

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"If I were terminally ill, wouldn't you pray for me?"

 

You can send them positive thoughts without praying to a God. It's really the same thing. Transferrence of energy.

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I was visiting my parent's church last Easter when at the end of the service the pastor asked each new person who had just asked christ into their life to ask a few people in the congregation to pray for them. The lady sitting behind me grabs my arm as I'm walking and and with this big, earnest smile on her face asks if I will pray for her. I have this bad habit where sometimes I will respond before my brain actually kicks in, so I smiled really big and said yes. I was the only one she asked, and I felt a little guilty walking out of service for lying to her (unintentional as it was)...

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My biological mother died from cancer. I prayed. She died.

 

I was a teen at the time.

 

Conclusion: Prayer can not be relied on, nor can the medical system.

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"No, Mom, I wouldn't pray, but I would hope.

I would sit by your bedside.

I would hold your hand.

I would dry your tears and wash your face.

I would read you stories, and tell you the news.

I would hope that the doctors are doing all they can.

And I would miss you when you were gone."

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Ask her if she would travel to mecca to plea Allah for your life if you were terminally ill, or if she would pray over her great grandparents graves in hopes their spirits would guide her. Hopefully that may give her the hint as to how ludicrous it is to ask questions of people based on beliefs which they do not hold.

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Myself, being someone who believes in some sort of "God", I want to pray for people,(I've even slipped up and done so from time to time.)but the reason for the most part I don't is because if God exists, it'd be asking him to play favorites.

The world's overflowing with folks who are in a bad way, some that only "An act of God " could help, but if "God" intervened on everyone's behalf freewill(which could be debated a lot) goes out the door. Why if God's going to interfere in human affairs why doesn't he just make the world perfect and without suffering?

 

 

Hang in there SilentLoner,

Tab

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Thnaks for all the replies guys. Subject was dropped relatively soon - think she realized what she said didn't make sense in terms of my lack of belief. Like I said, I wasn't trying to pick a fight.

 

And sad news. The girl with leukemia died yesterday.

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