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Goodbye Jesus

God Didn't Do It


pitchu

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Every now and then something happens to remind me to be grateful that I hold no god-concept.

 

My nephew and his wife are the epitome of sweetness and innocence. They're the kind of people about whom others say, "You never hear a bad word about them." Yet life has been harsh to each of them on many levels. Finally they found each other and were to have their first child.

 

Last Friday, late at night, they called to tell us their baby boy, of seven months development, was stillborn.

 

This sad event was the consequence of complications with pre-eclampsia.

 

So...

 

I neither have to question a god, nor blame a god, nor defend a god, nor pray to a god to give me understanding of his ways. I can just be cleanly sorrowful for them and call them daily to give them my love.

 

Like a human being.

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Every now and then something happens to remind me to be grateful that I hold no god-concept.

 

My nephew and his wife are the epitome of sweetness and innocence. They're the kind of people about whom others say, "You never hear a bad word about them." Yet life has been harsh to each of them on many levels. Finally they found each other and were to have their first child.

 

Last Friday, late at night, they called to tell us their baby boy, of seven months development, was stillborn.

 

This sad event was the consequence of complications with pre-eclampsia.

 

So...

 

I neither have to question a god, nor blame a god, nor defend a god, nor pray to a god to give me understanding of his ways. I can just be cleanly sorrowful for them and call them daily to give them my love.

 

Like a human being.

 

It is so sad that they lost their baby. Especially so late in the pregnancy.

 

I cannot begin to imagine how terrible they must feel. I hope such a thing never happens to any children I may conceive.

 

Someone I know was 3 weeks away from their delivery day when their baby just stopped moving. They went to the doctor and it turned out that they baby had strangled itself with the umbilical cord. My friend had to carry the dead baby for the remaining 3 weeks until she finally gave birth to it.

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Someone I know was 3 weeks away from their delivery day when their baby just stopped moving. They went to the doctor and it turned out that they baby had strangled itself with the umbilical cord. My friend had to carry the dead baby for the remaining 3 weeks until she finally gave birth to it.

 

 

Ghastly!!!

:eek:

 

They could not induce labor after it died?

 

Ugh!

 

Bet she stayed in the house for the whole 3 weeks! A woman that pregnant tends to get those creepy culty glowy looks from people in the "We are proud parents" club. Which is all fine and good so long as everything is going well....but to get that congratulatory look from people when you know you are carrying about a corpse....

 

*shudder*

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Someone I know was 3 weeks away from their delivery day when their baby just stopped moving. They went to the doctor and it turned out that they baby had strangled itself with the umbilical cord. My friend had to carry the dead baby for the remaining 3 weeks until she finally gave birth to it.

 

 

Ghastly!!!

:eek:

 

They could not induce labor after it died?

 

Ugh!

 

Bet she stayed in the house for the whole 3 weeks! A woman that pregnant tends to get those creepy culty glowy looks from people in the "We are proud parents" club. Which is all fine and good so long as everything is going well....but to get that congratulatory look from people when you know you are carrying about a corpse....

 

*shudder*

 

 

I don't know all of the details. I just know that she carried it dead for about 3 weeks.

 

It makes me cry when I think about it.

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Both of these stories are sad.

 

Reminds me that my mom occasionally (rarely...almost never) speaks of my two oldest brothers. How she went into the hospital to with a baby but came out with nothing even though everyone else did.

 

My wife lost our kid early and it tore me up inside. Still gets me from time to time.

 

mwc

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Guest awake now

I suffered two miscarriages myself. The second was pure hell. I was still grappling with a belief in God, Jesus and I truly believe that only made it worse. Now, when/if tragedy strikes I don't have to ask some invisible entity, "why?" It just is; and I deal with it and get love from friends and family.

 

BTW; I did eventually have a successful pregnancy and now have the most adorable little boy.

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Pitchu, thank you for this post. What a peaceful, succinct way to deal with grief. I am sorry for your loss

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*Hugs* Pitchu

 

Not sure there is anything else I can say.

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I'm sorry about your niece & nephew's loss. :(

 

It's good you can be there for them in a real, tangible, genuinely caring way.

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Just today my sister delivered (not her but for a patient) a grossly deformed baby with a rare birth defect, which happened to have been the second one this week. The ears were down to the neck, there were no eyes, no mouth, and an opening down in the chin region for breathing. It only lived for two hours. Yeah, that's God's great craftmanship there.

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Thanks, everyone, for your stories and your kind words.

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My condolences on your loss Pitchu.

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My condolences, Pitchu.

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I didn't post the other day when I read it, because I have no words. Hell doesn't come to those who passed on, but it is the awful and relentless sadness the surviving family feels after the loss.

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Thanks, again.

 

The thing is -- my sister (mother to my nephew) died three years ago, leaving him desolate. Then along came the woman he's waited almost 50 years to find and marry. This woman's mother is unavailable due to mental problems. So my surviving sister and I have tried to be surrogate moms to this couple, as best we can, which, of course, is never as good as the Real Thing.

 

But the two of them are turning even more tightly to each other, and I think they will get through the "hell" part and come out okay.

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