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All Fake


Guest mrmatt
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I live here in England and recently left a pentecostal church, which I had been trying to drag myself away from for about a year and half. Every time I stopped believing and decided to leave, the pastor or leaders would 'have a coffee and a chat' with me, basically to change my mind and 'protect my salvation'.

 

Does anyone notice how fake and pathetically false all your old church 'friends' are? Since I left not a single message, email or text message has come my way. And just to think of howe much they 'loved and cared' for me and whoever else.

 

I am glad to be away from thw place and to have freed my mind again instead of being closed in by religion and faith.

 

I am trying to help other younger people at the church to leave - but mostly I get responses like "My heart is aching for you" and "I'm praying so much for you to come back to God"...LOL...

 

Does anyone understand my position and the way that leaving the faith sheds the true light on them all?

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Welcome, mrmatt.

 

I've said this many times: Christians love a brother or sister in Christ, but not real people.

 

For most Christians, their supposed faith is in reality a little shaky, hence the frequent immersion is church services and activities. When someone leaves the fold, I think it scares them a little. They could be next!

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Christians are like those involved in AA/NA recovery programs. They'll be your friends as long as you're "one of them." They are merely fair weather friends, not true friends who love you no matter what you believe. (Unless you believe in roasting and eating babies.)

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Does anyone notice how fake and pathetically false all your old church 'friends' are? Since I left not a single message, email or text message has come my way. And just to think of howe much they 'loved and cared' for me and whoever else.

 

They have given you over to Satan. They want him to beat your ass so you will learn the error of your ways! :spanka:

 

 

I am trying to help other younger people at the church to leave - but mostly I get responses like "My heart is aching for you" and "I'm praying so much for you to come back to God"...LOL...

 

While they are muttering under their breath, "Get thee behind me Satan!" :fdevil: If you are trying to do this the pastor and his staff will literally be praying to the Sky Daddy to remove your ass from this earth! Or at least for god's judgement to be meted out and you know what that means! :bluegrab:

 

Does anyone understand my position and the way that leaving the faith sheds the true light on them all?

 

I think we can all relate to that. It is important to seek out new friends with a like mindset. You will find it very liberating.

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mrmatt, welcome to Ex-Christian! I totally relate. I attended a church for 5 years and when I left, I got 2 phone calls. One was from the official church busybody, and I knew it was her JOB to make the call. Not out of any personal concern. Who needs this crap?

 

My attitude is -give me some real friends who will stick by me no matter what I believe or just get the hell out of my face and leave me alone.

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Over the years, the best friend I've had has been the one who rejected my begging him to Christ when I was gung ho. He has been my friend through good and bad. I never hear from the "faithful"

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As a Christian, for two years I was part of a small group of about 20 people, led by one of the church elders.

 

After divorce and deconversion, I only heard from one of those people again- and that was only because we happened to run into one another in town. I don't totally blame the group members, because many people, not just Christians, react badly or by pulling away when they feel awkwardly about a situation, but I 100% blame the elder whose JOB was to at least find out what had happened to me. I'd have preferred having him contact me to let me know that he and the church disapproved of my actions, to having me be someone who was obviously not just important enough to him to contact.

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What makes me most sickly in the stomach is how I think back to when I was kind of being 'ripened' up for joining the church, the bit where you are not a member but are kind of talking or meeting with one of the members whose intention is merely to get you to church, not to be a pal. I was meeting up with one of the leaders in the church week in week out for months before I joined, and he could not do enough for me, inviting me round his house for dinner with his wife, asking me to go to the movies, popping round my house now and then and so on....But now it's all so transparent to me, and what's worse is that I understand that he is doing the exact same thing to someone we both know mutually at his workplace...It's like a fake production line, offer fake friendship and get 'em to church!, on to the next one, and the next one...Makes me feel quite sick.

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What makes me most sickly in the stomach is how I think back to when I was kind of being 'ripened' up for joining the church, the bit where you are not a member but are kind of talking or meeting with one of the members whose intention is merely to get you to church, not to be a pal. I was meeting up with one of the leaders in the church week in week out for months before I joined, and he could not do enough for me, inviting me round his house for dinner with his wife, asking me to go to the movies, popping round my house now and then and so on....But now it's all so transparent to me, and what's worse is that I understand that he is doing the exact same thing to someone we both know mutually at his workplace...It's like a fake production line, offer fake friendship and get 'em to church!, on to the next one, and the next one...Makes me feel quite sick.

 

It's definetely a numbers game. They have to get as many tithe paying members as they can in order for the mind virus to survive. I would warn your friend if I were you. Don't let him go through what you have been through. It would be an act of compassion.

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I can't say I was ever that close to people at church. I went to Bible study groups and stuff, but never really got that attached to anybody. When I stopped going to my first church, nobody noticed at all. I stopped going to the second after I separated from my first husband; other than a single phone call and a very uncomfortable dinner with a couple of folks from my church group, the assistant pastor, and his wife, I never heard a word.

 

But I didn't mind. I was really relieved, when it came down to it. I think I got lucky, too, given some of the nightmare harassment folks have experienced from more controlling churches.

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I was banned from my group of Christian freinds for being to liberal in my views, asking hard qustions and challegning them right back when they try to challenge me. So my freinds decided that it would be better to kick me out of the group and have me burn in hell forever if it would keep my mouth shut.

 

 

 

I think we all feel your pain.

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Out of all the denominations I have been through, Pentecostals are the worst offenders when it comes to the plastic pasty-fake smile. I feel your pain.

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