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I Give Up.


LastKing
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Well For the last year I have been trying to find somthing that is not Christian, The Main thing I wanted was Unitarin Univerlism but the nearset Church is to far. Then I Wanted to Try Buddhism, Once again nearest tempal is to far. Then I had thoughts about Paganism, no shuch gruop was found in the area. At one point I try to look into Islam becasue I found a groupe of liberal Muslism avliable in the college I go to but I blew my Chances to go and now its gone! Then I started reading about Taoism but once again nothing was in the area. Then I started looking into hinduism well there is one tempal avlibal but its in a ruff area (Pluse I could never determine if it was a safe group to go to). Everthing els in my area is Christian, there a chuch ever two or three miles and I am not happy about it. So I can eaither A. sudmit and join a church B. wait for somthing new to finlay come up or C. (The one I did pick) just forget about it.

 

Can any one relate?

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While it may be difficult to find a local group for a different religion, there are other resources available. I did a lot of reading, viewing DVDs, internet research, and so forth, before I actually went on a serious hunt for a group. Yes, to find a good group you may have to do some driving. The computer is your greatest resource. Check Meetup.com online to see if any people have organized any small groups. Check http://www.buddhanet.info/wbd/ for Buddhist groups. Keep looking. Why go somewhere that makes you miserable? Find some place that inspires you.

 

I guess it depends on your level of interest and determination.

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hey there King,

 

I'm not sure of your background so I'm making a couple of assumptions. Examine your motivation. If you are looking for these places to fill a void caused by the rejection of Christianity, then you aren't going to be happy with anything else. As Deva suggested, do some homework on what you are looking for. Start your search with google or the library before you go looking for a temple. There are members of this community who are quite informed in Hinduism, Taoism, and Buddhism, all you have to do is ask.

 

It's kinda like buying a car you do have to shop around. Don't know a whole lot about Taoism, but there are many models of "Buddhism" and "Hinduism" to choose from.

 

Temples and practice centers are good for the direct human contact and community feel, but people are people and play the same sort of social games even in the Exotic Eastern Religions™ so be careful of that.

 

 

There are Buddhist teachers and practice communities online. If you are interested in that I can toss you a few links, but it's not necessary to join a group to start practice.

 

R

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For that matter, why do you need to belong to a group that meets on a regular basis? Do you have to have the approval and support of others or can you go it alone and belong to something that is not an organized, revealed religion. I find Deism is quite fulfilling, we have no congregations, no "holy" books, no buildings, no priests, and no meetings. We find the Creator in this great wonderful Creation that he made and we don't worry that he doesn't interact with us. After all, being left alone to handle your own problems in your own way it the nth, the apex, the epitome of free will. Try it or any other type of the non organized, revealed religions. - Heimdall :yellow:

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Do not choose "A. sudmit and join a church" I am in your situation too and I have gave up alot of times and went back to church. It hasn't changed a bit I promise you what ever reason you left is still there. Plus if you go to a church and leave and you wil lthen people will bug you to go back.

 

If you are still interested in finding a Pagan group then www.witchvox.com may be a good place to look. Also go to yahoogroups type in your city or state in the search engine and what ever religion your looking for. www.Google.com and www.myspace.com can be of help too.

 

 

I know internet groups and friends aren't the same as having friends in your town or close by but just hang in there who knows maybe someday someone will join a group your in and you can meet them.

 

Don't give up keep trying and find groups on the internet you'll run into someone near you someday.

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How about STARTING a group? It's very tempting, personally. And maybe, just maybe I will, because I love this idea:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/conte...8122001896.html

 

What a fun thing it would be, and what a comfort, to find the sense of community and congregation -- "the fellowship of kindred minds" -- that we had hoped to find in Christianity, and didn't, or couldn't.

 

It just sounds wonderful, and that need for fellowship is totally human and normal -- if you can't find it, create it.

 

Maybe there are other people in your area who are in the same situation you're in -- and they're trying to find that fellowship too?

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Well For the last year I have been trying to find somthing that is not Christian, The Main thing I wanted was Unitarin Univerlism but the nearset Church is to far. Then I Wanted to Try Buddhism, Once again nearest tempal is to far. Then I had thoughts about Paganism, no shuch gruop was found in the area. At one point I try to look into Islam becasue I found a groupe of liberal Muslism avliable in the college I go to but I blew my Chances to go and now its gone! Then I started reading about Taoism but once again nothing was in the area. Then I started looking into hinduism well there is one tempal avlibal but its in a ruff area (Pluse I could never determine if it was a safe group to go to). Everthing els in my area is Christian, there a chuch ever two or three miles and I am not happy about it. So I can eaither A. sudmit and join a church B. wait for somthing new to finlay come up or C. (The one I did pick) just forget about it.

 

Can any one relate?

 

 

I can totally relate. Right now the only people I have any desire to talk with at all are the people I have developed friendships with online. No one else around me understands...actually they don't even know. For me, I am embarassed by the last 20 years....can't talk about it with anyone. But I do understand the lonliness. While it is nice to have online friends it is not the same as having that friend next to you to put their arm around your shoulder. I did the same thing that it sounds like you are doing....I looked at every religion I could think of that didn't have god and the bible as the cornerstone. Then I realized that I was just trying to find an easy out if you will...wanted to replace my religion with something else to dictate what I should and shouldn't do. It was because I don't do very well at making decisions...but I haven't really had to decide anything for 20 years so why should I be surprised by that? So I have started trying to just make small ones....like deciding where to go to lunch instead of saying "I don't care, you decide." Anyhow....my point was, I can relate and it is so hard, but I believe I can and will make new friends once I find my own path for myself....and you can too.

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Life is hard. Life is lonely. I know what you mean about making internet friends and wanting to find a place to be accepted and belong to. All humans crave physical touch, and total acceptance of who we are. We are social creatures, so we seem to have that inner desire to connect with people, to share our sorrows and tribulations. Unfortunately I believe that no matter what group of people you choose to hang with, regardless of if it's xtian or not, there will always be disputes and quarrels. The selfish gene in every one of us always seems to create strife, so it will be a rare day that you will find a group of like-minded people that are in harmony. Just my observations anyway. But still there is that yearning and wanting in each of us to connect and belong to something, like a community. For me I have found it here on this site and other sites..but alas it still doesnt compensate for the deep satisfaction you get from hanging in real life with real human beings. That is something I seriously need to work on in my own life. How to connect to real live beings out there in the real world...its certainly a challenge for someone so socially inept as me. :grin:

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Guest sinderella60

Have you tried meetup.com? You can join for free and then search any topic and find groups that meet regularly. The groups are usually under spirituality, everything from pagan, wicca, metaphysics, atheist, agnostic, freethinkers, well, you get the picture. You then join the group, get the meeting details, go check it out and see if it is something you want to attend again. We belong to several groups from meetup and have met a lot of diversity. We pick and choose the meetings we attend and have meet a lot of great people that we normally would not have met.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Well For the last year I have been trying to find somthing that is not Christian, The Main thing I wanted was Unitarin Univerlism but the nearset Church is to far.

 

I belonged to a UUA congregation here for about 4 years. Wonderful bunch of people I can tell you. But UUA also has an internet outreach for people in your situation. It's called CLF, or Church of the Larger Fellowship. Check it out-------------

 

http://clf.uua.org/

 

As for me, I'm an atheist and I fit right in while I was there. About 35-40% of the congregation I belonged to identified as atheist or agnostic. Lots Deists and maybe some pantheists, a couple of Buddists, and a handful of secular Jews. Now I'm not active there anymore. I do however participate in 3 or 4 message boards on the internet, and I've found one in particular that is "home" for me.

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This topic comes up again and again. I don't want to insult anyone, I'm sure your struggles are very real. I just don't understand why anyone would need to find a "church" substitute. There are a million things in this world to be involved in. Why are you looking for another religious organization to join? Simply to fill a social void? I just don't get that.

 

What do you love to do? What is your passion? What interests you? Go out and do it and you will meet people and you will fill you social void. Volunteer somewhere, take a course, join a club that plays a game you like, take up running, or volleyball. I don't know, the possibilities are endless.

 

The idea of exchanging xtian church or some other church is just alien to me. I have plenty of friends and opportunities for "fellowship" and I have not darkened the door of any religious institution for a very long time. Expand your thinking.

 

Heather

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Have you thought about finding a group that has nothing to do with your beliefs? I'm part of a running group that has atheists, Christians, Catholics, a pagan, a UU and probably some other beliefs, and those things don't affect the group dynamic because the group isn't about religion. The people whose beliefs I know, I've found out by chance or small off-hand comments, not because anyone tried to push their beliefs on me.

 

For a couple years after my deconversion, I tried hard to find a new "belief group". And like you, nothing stuck. But honestly, you don't even seem to have a set of beliefs of your own, if Taoist, liberal Muslim and UU groups all seemed like possibilities for you. You seem desperate to replace Christianity with the first thing that comes your way, no matter what that thing is. I thought that my own beliefs were closest to Unitarianism, but it turned out that they weren't, since the local church and most other UUs that I know have a strong emphasis on "spirituality".

 

There is certainly a void present when you leave Christianity and your entire social structure collapses. And you do have to start filling it in with new friends and life experiences and associations. And that can be very hard and draining. But you don't have to fill it with something that's an exact replication under a different name of the thing you left.

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