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What Were You Angriest About?


Vomit Comet
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I was not so much pissed off as I was disappointed with the people involved with the churches -- how ready they were to turn their backs and talk shit on someone if they weren't so perfect in the eyes of the church, or how they were collecting money and donations but they wouldn't put a new goddamn door on the church when the old one was falling apart, yet the pastor/preacher/priest guy had a new car. I don't feel this way anymore, since I realized I'm going to change these peoples minds as much as they will change mine. I'm rather indifferent.

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Politics is my biggest concern. Anyone who has read my ex-testimony has an idea where I stand on this. I never really was a christian, but I grew up with them in a fundamentalist household and to some degree respected their religion even though I figured it was just a harmless delusion. It wasn't until I got into my teens and really started to take a look at Christianity did I realize how fucked up their view of the world is.

 

Xians allow themselves to be swayed against anything that the church tells them goes against their little belief system. Stem cell research ? Homosexual marriage ? Evolution ? All of these are impeded by the mass delusions of millions of people. Its really quite incredibly sad.

 

Even other things which are not directly influenced by it may not have happened. The war in Iraq for example. Part of our involvement with the middle east is because of our strong religious bias. Its just as much a religious war as it is a war for oil. Then there is the outlook that the religious right gives. Other countries look at Americans like we are idiots for the fundamentalist bullshit we pull, which can't be good in the long run.

 

All of it together just makes me want to facepalm so hard it bends the laws of gravity.

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I was extremely angry when I began to de-convert a few years ago. Now it comes and goes. It seems as soon as I think I am over their programming, I find something else and then I have to tear it apart. The whole process has been rather painful and the longer I live the more I realize how childish and foolish their doctrines are. It saddens me to see how destructive this force is and yet people continue to devote themselves to a set of doctrines that demonize living.

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I checked 9 of the checkboxes. And I'm in between. I'm not really angry anymore, but it angers me when the people who represents the religion tells me they have the "truth" and that I'm wrong and all that shit.

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Right now, today, I am really fuckin pissed off. I usually mitigate my emotions a bit better, but I just am SO MAD about how they cast us in this awful light... it's so patronizing. I don't even want to get into what all happened, because I'm just tired of it and I don't really want to dwell on it. Whatever. Yeah, I'm still angry. I just want the whole lot of em to disappear from my life and to be replaced with an awesome humanist network.

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Sometimes I am angry. Usually when I think back to what was promised by the religion and compare it to what my life actually was.

 

I get mad sometimes that its all so nonsensical and my parents are so blinded by this crap.

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Do I really NEED to specify my answer?

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I think my biggest one was my sexuality. Im angry about that. Somedays I am normal and others I feel so confused, emotional and just angry and unfortunately it can show in some of my posts or if I come across a xtian in the shoutbox...

I feel so embarrassed at some of the things I used to believe and wonder if god if he's there is really that judgemental. I absolutely hate that mantra hate the sin, love the sinner. Well take a look at a gay person. You may love the person, but your not really loving them fully if you don't accept that person's desires, thoughts and dreams. It is just a load of hypocrital crap.

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I would say I'm more annoyed than pissed off now. But I still am irritated by the fact that it's all fake, and I have relatives who have given their lives to the religion.

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I stopped being angry when I was able to tell my father that I wasn't a Christian.

 

I feel sad that my parents now think I'm going to hell, but they no longer have a psychological hold over me anymore. It helps in not being angry that I know they loved me and thought they were doing what was best for me, rather than trying to control me out of some sadistic pleasure.

 

I will never stop considering some of the people who shunned me after my deconversion to be total assholes, but they aren't worth my bitterness. I won't even let them have that one little corner of my life. Although there is one former pastor who I won't hesitate to lambaste if I ever see him again.

 

I feel that I lost my childhood and wasted time with assholes, but honestly, I know a lot of people who went to public school or weren't heavily involved with a church who feel the same way over different situations and different choices. I have friends who were terribly abused by non-religious parents or spouses. There are so many things that can fuck up someone's life, dwelling on this one thing isn't helping me to move on.

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Hi...I'm new here.

 

The thing that made me the most angry (and fearful) was the doctrine of Hell. I kept going over and over this doctrine in my mind. I came to the conclusion that even though I was "saved" at the time, I couldn't stand the thought of my loved ones burning in an eternal torture chamber with no hope of ever getting out. It just wasn't right. And most of my family and friends are non-Christian.

 

The whole doctrine of Hell is sick and disgusting in ways that transcend words. How could anyone with a conscience worship such a diety? [and let's not forget all the other atrocities of the Abrahamic god...the Biblegod is clearly evil]

 

Even now, I still have a fear of Hell, even though it goes against my logic and no matter how much I educate myself on the subject, I fear that there will always be that little voice saying "But what if you're wrong? What if God really is beyond logic? Or what if he's malevolent and is lying to us?" Even though the religion doesn't make sense to me, and deep down, I do believe in some kind of benevolent higher power, these irrational thoughts pop into my head from time to time (the result of so much exposure to Christian scare tactics).

 

It's just so twisted. Why should people have to live in fear that if they don't worship the right way or don't accept a son-of-God sacrifice that may or may not be fictitious, they'll be punished for ETERNITY?

 

I could go on and on about how I feel about this, but I won't at the moment. Really, it all just transcends words...

 

*having too much fun playing with the fonts and stuff*

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Oh, erm, sorry for double-posting but I want to ask a question and I'm not sure where to ask it?

 

Is there any way to edit posts?

Arcane, I think once you past 25 posts it will let you edit it them then.. Until then I guess you just have to grin and bear it. :)

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I voted cramp on my sexuality and wasted years I could have been having fun living my life. If I could have gotten over my self esteem issues, I could have been dating and having sex with pretty women. As for the having fun thing, I was 18 in 1984, and was around for punk rock and the golden days of heavy metal. I could have been going to Misfit shows and slamdancing and Metallica shows and moshing. And there could have been so many other fun things I could have been doing. I stopped going to church in 87 after the religious scandals and was a backslid christian, but still the dogma had a hold on me and I couldn't just let myself completely go and enjoy life.

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Not angry at all.

Just sad and full of regret. Sad because I know my life could have been much better and much more successful if I had grown up being taught to believe in myself. I cannot really be angry at my parents. They were very loving, and did the very best they could according to what they believed. There was no hypocrisy what-so-ever. If fact, in my own church experience, I found most to be honest, and good people. The hypocrites were definitely the minority.

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