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Deconversion Shenanigans


Prysm
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My husband and I began to participate in some secret mischief leading up to the public announcement of our deconversion. All that angst just had to go somewhere! We feel that you fine folks at ex-christian.net deserve a laugh or two, since these tidbits would probably go unappreciated in our circles right now…

 

-We faked communion during church.

-As a pastor and wife, we managed to stop attending church altogether for over a month before anyone noticed.

-CJ prepared a semester-long curriculum on weak apologetics, knowing he wouldn't be there to teach it.

- He also started buying atheist books on his clergy library account... RESEARCH!

-CJ surfed ex-christian and listened to atheist podcasts in his office at the church.

-One of the youth group girls almost caught me reading Why I Became an Atheist by John Loftus on Sunday night while CJ was leading youth group.

-Pulled our tithe from the church months in advance.

-Exchanged a christmas gift from a student’s parent: Rick Warren’s The Purpose of Christmas for Darwin’s Origin of the Species.

-I bought CJ the domain name for his blog about leaving the faith for xmas.

-I went out to a bar with my group co-leader during the youth group leader’s spiritual retreat rather than hanging around the retreat center being spiritual.

-We both left the youth leader xmas party to get completely drunk with my co-workers.

-CJ left the contents of his office in boxes for weeks after the guys painting his office conveniently packed them up for him. He got a few raised eyebrows for the delay.

-He also was paid as a guest lecturer on youth ministry at the bible college we both graduated from, only to come out a couple months later as a non-believer.

-CJ changed his Xbox live avatar to look exactly like Jesus… then changed all of the avatars on the church’s Xboxes before leaving the church for good.

-During our anniversary trip, we noticed an xtian convention for youth groups and leaders right across the street from us. Since we had yet to test our powers of debate, we hunted down a likely-looking candidate and attempted to get evangelized. After two hours, we were successful and “Jeremy the youth pastor” left with more questions than we had answers.

-One month after leaving the church, when the final severance pay had come through and all ties were irrevocably cut, CJ f Filmed a pro-lesbian commercial for an alcohol company in a local gay bar (speaking of which, watch for another post on this commercial).

-We will leave you with one last joy. The following is a series of correspondence between a youth group leader and CJ on facebook, after she became upset about him posting stats about spontaneous abortions on her pro-life video. I think our response is simply divine! Enjoy:

 

HER MESSAGE: CJ, I just need you to know that I am praying for you. You may be done with God but God is not done with you.... If I am wrong, I have nothing to lose. But if you are wrong, you have everything to lose. And I feel sorry for you.

 

Looks like you may have removed me as a friend and that is what it is. I removed your comments because I love my youth group girls and they see enough and hear enough junk in this world that I did not want them exposed if they didn't see it already. It disappoints me that you found it necessary to stir up such discussion when you knew i am facebook friends with kids from youth group.

 

OUR RESPONSE: (name removed), I just need you to know that I am thinking for you. You may be done with thought and reality but reality is not done with you.... If I am wrong, I have nothing to lose. But if you are wrong, you have everything to lose. And I feel sorry for you.

 

Looks like you may have removed my comments from your post and that is what it is. I removed you as a friend because I love honest dialogue and I see enough and hear enough junk in this world that I did not want to be exposed if didn't have to already. It disappoints me that you found it necessary to censor such discussion and rather chose to use facebook as one-sided propaganda to influence the kids from youth group.

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W00t! Good job! Maybe you can follow Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron around and undo their damage.

 

If you ever care to post some of the discussion you had with the other youth pastor (the one who left with questions), I'd love to see it. I haven't yet engaged any believers in questioning yet, but have come up with a bible study that asks difficult questions. I need to verify a few verses in it and then I'll be posting it here for people to critique.

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I'm so jealous of all the fun you had!

 

I've always wanted to infiltrate an Alpha course...

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-CJ surfed ex-christian and listened to atheist podcasts in his office at the church.

 

That just gives me a funny visual. Perhaps there are more pastors out there reading Ex C from their offices. It's like one of those cynical 1990s Hollywood comedy outtakes where they show the real world that is occurring behind the scenes of the rose colored world that is the public image.

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Too funny. Too great.

 

Couldn't the two of you become some kind of Super-Anti-Hero Duo? I mean, how do you guys look in capes?

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-Exchanged a christmas gift from a student’s parent: Rick Warren’s The Purpose of Christmas for Darwin’s Origin of the Species.

 

It was all funny, but for some reason I laughed especially hard on this one. The irony did it for me I guess. I haven't read this particular rick warren book, but I did read his firt two "Purpose driven . . ." books. I never read Origin, though. It seems too dated to read. Maybe I'll give the Cliff notes a try.

 

But the irony :lmao:

 

 

He also started buying atheist books on his clergy library account... RESEARCH!

 

This one came in a close second! :wicked:

 

Thanks for the laughs.

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Prysm, thanks for sharing! It is all too funny, but I think I gasped out loud when I read this:

 

-As a pastor and wife, we managed to stop attending church altogether for over a month before anyone noticed.

 

What fun!!!!!

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I nominate them for "Hell's Most Fun Couple."

 

We are honored! Does this come with some sort of monetary award? :wicked: Of course, it's just fun to bring a smile to the faces of our ExC community.

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Ok, that was great for laughs! I can't imagine how you even pulled it all off! You both know hos to go out in style, yes! :lmao:

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