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Goodbye Jesus

My Church - Oh The Things They Say


Anna

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Heres some things the guest pastor at my church said this morning and I jotted down.....

 

"the kingdom of god does not make any sense"

 

"The bible dosn't have to make sense. We need to step above intellect, reason & rationality for god."

 

"I dont care if it makes sense, It makes faith, Its on a whole nother level"

 

Im not twisting these quotes in any way.

 

Its like im hearing them with differnt ears! Things get said in my church and they get clapping and people yelling praise jesus.

 

I took a picture of my church this morning for you to have a look.

link

 

Its not just me that can see what im talking about right?

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It's not just you at all. I actually listen to Christian radio specifically because I can pretty much count on the damned preacher saying something hilarious at some point. My all-time favorite was when some moron-of-God who clearly never got past the third grade was ranting about how deluded all the people are who "believe" in evolution. He was getting himself all worked up and then spat out this little gem:

 

"Why, anyone with half a brain would agree with me!"

 

:twitch::lmao:

 

The thing that got me about your post was that as I read it, I automatically pictured some little wooden church built in the forties with maybe thirty or forty people raptly listening to your damned preacher.

 

Then I checked out your photo.

 

Shit. :blink:

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Very much not just you. Is your Church Pentecostal, by any chance? The picture seemed to be from one of those charismatic ones.

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It's very much not you.

 

Thing is, the pastor is right, in a way. He knows that the Bible doesn't make sense, and he knows that the only way to keep people believing in it is if they suspend all reason, rationality, and intellect. He knows that his religion will die if too many people actually use their brains and take a critical look at it. So he encourages people to use faith instead of intelligence.

 

He probably also knows that the best way to shut down a real argument about the merits of his religion is to play the faith trump card, because you can't really argue with faith. So it's all in his best interest to promote mindlessness.

 

Pity, really.

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There was an editorial in my newspaper a few weeks ago that was saying basically the same thing. That the whole thing makes no sense at all but if you just have faith, it's all okay. Basically an admission that they believe it because they want to and that they don't have any more reason to be a Christian than a Muslim or a Scientologist.

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Yeah mega churches can get a really bad case of 'group' think. In a situation like that it only takes a few people who really believe the nonsense before it spreads like a virus to every one else in the audience. Thankfully the northern states are spared the spread of mega churches as has taken place in southern states.

 

His quotes might as well go up on a comedy poster.

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It's not just you, Anna.

 

I've seen pastors raving about that whole "It doesnt have to make sense, it's just faith, and that's good enough" stuff before. I see it as their retaliation to the Non-Christian world pointing out all of the Bible's contradictions. They obviously see that the contradictions are there, so had to make up something to not lose control over their "Flock" of crazies.

 

If you ask me, it's the same exact thing as someone coming up to you with a copy of War of the Worlds and try to convince you that Martians are invading your town (Which actually caused mass hysteria thanks to Orson Wells' Radio Drama back years ago)

 

Some churches are like Sanitariums with the crazies in charge.

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It's not just you at all. I actually listen to Christian radio specifically because I can pretty much count on the damned preacher saying something hilarious at some point. My all-time favorite was when some moron-of-God who clearly never got past the third grade was ranting about how deluded all the people are who "believe" in evolution. He was getting himself all worked up and then spat out this little gem:

 

"Why, anyone with half a brain would agree with me!"

 

:twitch::lmao:

 

The thing that got me about your post was that as I read it, I automatically pictured some little wooden church built in the forties with maybe thirty or forty people raptly listening to your damned preacher.

 

Then I checked out your photo.

 

Shit. :blink:

 

LOL lovely. I might keep a rechord of all the real funny stuff I hear the people at my church say.

 

HAHA 40? oh no more like hundreds. All lifting their hands and yelling praise jesus when the preacher says somthing that to me is obvoiusly obsurd.

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Very much not just you. Is your Church Pentecostal, by any chance? The picture seemed to be from one of those charismatic ones.

It is indeed

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It's very much not you.

 

Thing is, the pastor is right, in a way. He knows that the Bible doesn't make sense, and he knows that the only way to keep people believing in it is if they suspend all reason, rationality, and intellect. He knows that his religion will die if too many people actually use their brains and take a critical look at it. So he encourages people to use faith instead of intelligence.

 

He probably also knows that the best way to shut down a real argument about the merits of his religion is to play the faith trump card, because you can't really argue with faith. So it's all in his best interest to promote mindlessness.

 

Pity, really.

 

It really is a pity. I very much like your siggie.

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There was an editorial in my newspaper a few weeks ago that was saying basically the same thing. That the whole thing makes no sense at all but if you just have faith, it's all okay. Basically an admission that they believe it because they want to and that they don't have any more reason to be a Christian than a Muslim or a Scientologist.

 

I hate how your supposed to back off if someone says "its my faith!"

You shouldnt need faith to belive somthing thats true.

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Yeah mega churches can get a really bad case of 'group' think. In a situation like that it only takes a few people who really believe the nonsense before it spreads like a virus to every one else in the audience. Thankfully the northern states are spared the spread of mega churches as has taken place in southern states.

 

His quotes might as well go up on a comedy poster.

 

If you put the qoutes up on a church wall they would seem like motivational posters but if you put them anywhere with resonable people the would be comedy posters XD

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"The bible dosn't have to make sense. We need to step above intellect, reason & rationality for god."

Well, "above" just might not be the correct word,but... :rolleyes:

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Its not just me that can see what im talking about right?

 

I'd say I clearly get what you mean.

 

It's something I noticed too, comparing church services (mainstream ones that is) here in Germany with the crap one can - for example - see on TBN.

 

Here, the whole thing is normally brutally boring... but if something remarkable happens, it's commonly some real neat thing said in the sermon, something you find good and/or wise even on a purely rational level, without bringing gawd or jebus into the picture.

 

There, everything is designed to shut down the victims' brains so that they swallow everything in their induced hysteria. Your pic looks pretty much like that. :Hmm:

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I hate how your supposed to back off if someone says "its my faith!"

 

Well to be fair, it's everyone's right to (dis)believe everything in private. However, when that (dis)belief starts to affect other people in any way... :vent:

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The quotes just go to show that the real driving force behind Christianity is faith. And faith, once attained, can and does blind the faithful (I know this from personal experience).

 

I noticed a few posts about the lack of mega churches in the north (since I am southern, I took notice of those statements). According to this website, it does not appear that mega churches are just a southern thing. Rather, they are a national thing: http://hirr.hartsem.edu/cgi-bin/mega/db.pl...p;ID=*&sb=5

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There are a bunch in Southern California (not so much in northern!), including Saddleback. But at the same time, and except for a few pockets (a certain slice of Orange County, for example), SoCal is thankfully nothing like the Bible Belt.

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I'm sure if we all compiled this stuff we could make a hilarious book!

 

Well, maybe a sadly pathetic book.

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I love the opening post. It would be great to compile these kinds of quotes from those of you who still have to attend church. I love reading this shit!

 

Keep it coming. There has to be some benefit for those of you who are chained to those seats every Sunday!

 

Heather

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I found another little jem from a while back I wrote down during church.

 

My church has its own primary school and kindergarden. The pastor thats in charge of the school was talking about it and she said this.

 

"We are teaching them maths and science flipped upside down to fit the bible!"

 

I face palmed. The poor kids.

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I'm sure if we all compiled this stuff we could make a hilarious book!

 

Well, maybe a sadly pathetic book.

 

I think I may write them all down. Itl be like my own FSTDT book.

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"We are teaching them maths and science flipped upside down to fit the bible!"

 

Translates directly into "child abuse". :vent:

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I looked at the picture of your church. What's going on there? Is it a holdup? Your money or your life? :grin:

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I looked at the picture of your church. What's going on there? Is it a holdup? Your money or your life? :grin:

 

This is a stickup! everyone put your hands in the air!

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There are a bunch in Southern California (not so much in northern!), including Saddleback. But at the same time, and except for a few pockets (a certain slice of Orange County, for example), SoCal is thankfully nothing like the Bible Belt.

Ah, you're in my neighborhood?

 

We went to Saddleback one time. Too big. Too noisy.

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