Guest ephymeris Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 If you want an idea of how extreme some of the teachings can get, read this to get an idea. Quoted from the above website regarding the "song of hell" © Copyright by Apostle Elisabeth Elijah Nikomia Please if you know Carman or if you would copy and send it to HIM he is the one with the anointing to record what was given to me. The Holy Spirit told me this when it was given to me. I will NEVER re-record this again. I had to get very sick for this anointing. I had a visitation from a Citizen in Hell or an Open Vision! Mock me if you want, but Millions will come to YAHUSHUA because of this song, " Citizen in Hell!" BWAHAHA! Send this to CARMAN?? That is hilarious!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 How many mothers have cried at nights afraid that their children will go to this place of eternal torture? Since hell is not real and thus no one will actually be eternally tortured there, the cruelty of hell lies in how the doctrine has caused the real heart-felt fear that either an individual or one or more of the individual's loved ones will go to this wretched place! This terrible fear has created hell on earth for untold millions of people. How cruel. How disgustingly cruel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bird28 Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 As I said in another thread, my former pastor believed it was great that his son had nightmares and cried at night and stuff because he was sad for all those that would go to hell and had dreams of people burning in Hell. I remember in Sunday School being taught that missing church would send you to Hell. Awful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neon Genesis Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 This thread reminds me of that episode of South Park where Richard Dawkins was hired to teach evolution in Mr Garrison's class because he was a transsexual creationist. Mr. Garrison threatened Dawkins by telling him he was going to hell for believing in evolution and he asked Dawkins if he was scared of that and he just responded by saying "No, I'm an atheist." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apostate Nate Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 This thread reminds me of that episode of South Park where Richard Dawkins was hired to teach evolution in Mr Garrison's class because he was a transsexual creationist. Mr. Garrison threatened Dawkins by telling him he was going to hell for believing in evolution and he asked Dawkins if he was scared of that and he just responded by saying "No, I'm an atheist." Haha, I loved those episodes. South Park has a good way of poking fun at xtians (and just about everybody else, for that matter). Anybody remember the millennium episode where Jesus hosts a Rod Stewart concert in Las Vegas? Or the cameo appearances Jesus makes in Imaginationland? @OP I was taught this: *puts on Christian face* Um, duh! It's magical fire! Next question please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loren Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 See, your problem is that you're being all "scientific" and stuff. Just as fire (as you know it) has no place in the afterlife, neither does "logic" or the "laws of nature." Silly athiest. Let me set you straight. See, when your soul goes to hell (cuz it will, trust me) there are two possibilities. 1) Your soul/conscious will simply experience the sensation of painful agonizing burning in fire for all eternity. OR 2) It's magic. So there. If you're going to resort to that scholarly theological stuff, I'd suggest that you use the proper terminology. For number 2, instead of saying, "It's magic," the correct theological phrase would be, "It's a Mystery!" Important note: In discussing Christian theology, when you say, "It's a Mystery," remember to wiggle your fingers. If you don't wiggle your fingers, it won't work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loren Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 Buuuuuuuut......wait! Friend, if you send in a small donation I will personally bless you and pray for your soul. Hold your hand up to the computer screen. Do it now...Do it now....Do it now.... I want you to take out your credit cards and dial that number on the screen. I'm going to pray for you while you do. Gaaaaaaaaawd will bless this giver and spare them from the eternal fires of hellllllllllllll. See...there's a way out. Another minor quibble with terminology: If you're looking to fleece the sheep, never, ever use words like, "donate," "contribute," "pay," or "fork over." Instead, try saying things like, "You can partner with our ministry by sending a luuuuuv offering." In fact, it's probably best if you learn how to spend your entire sermon talking about money, how much you need it and how giving you money is the one infallible way to please God without ever once using the actual word, "money." It really is quite a tricky discipline, so if you'd like a fine example to follow, I'd urge you to immerse yourself, nay, wallow in the sermons of Dr. Michael Youssef. I've created an award to honor shining examples of scholarly Christian theological discourse called the Alexander Haig Award. Back during the Iran/Contra scandal, Alexander Haig was asked a rather direct question in a press conference about one of the obvious lies he'd told. With great umbrage, he replied, "That's not a lie! That's a terminological inexactitude!" I was awestruck! With one stroke, Al took the art of bullshit to a truly transcendent level. !!Alexander!! And the Alexander Haig Award was born. It's an annual award which I usually bestow on Dr. R.C. Sproul on a weekly basis. Dr. Ravi Zacharias also gets quite a few of them every year. But one week, I heard Dr. Youssef actually use the book of Ruth as a springboard for a sermon on tithing. I'm not kidding. That week, the Alexander Haig Award went to Dr. Michael Youssef. Dr. Youssef has a true gift, no doubt straight from the Holy Spirit, to turn absolutely any topic into a launching point for talking about tithing. He really is pretty amazing. I hope this helps. We now return you to your regular tea-time discussion of the exact mechanics of eternal damnation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chefranden Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 If you want an idea of how extreme some of the teachings can get, read this to get an idea. Quoted from the above website regarding the "song of hell" © Copyright by Apostle Elisabeth Elijah Nikomia Please if you know Carman or if you would copy and send it to HIM he is the one with the anointing to record what was given to me. The Holy Spirit told me this when it was given to me. I will NEVER re-record this again. I had to get very sick for this anointing. I had a visitation from a Citizen in Hell or an Open Vision! Mock me if you want, but Millions will come to YAHUSHUA because of this song, " Citizen in Hell!" BWAHAHA! Send this to CARMAN?? That is hilarious!!! Was that Carman or Cartman? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RationalOkie Posted June 12, 2009 Share Posted June 12, 2009 If you want an idea of how extreme some of the teachings can get, read this to get an idea. Here are a few lyrics from the song: Flaming worms crawl in, flaming worms crawl out in the belly button and out the mouth! In the front and out the rear! In the eyes and out the ears! We scream for mercy yet NO one cares or hears! Red hot pain in my blood rivers of feces, lava, vomit and blood it looks like a flood! Flames everywhere yet they cast NO light! All I have is every kind of pain, terror, torture and fright! I am a Citizen in HELL! This is the first level of HELL the other levels there are NO words to tell! Hell is so hot it boils the flesh off my skin how do I describe the HELLISH pain I'm in! I'm so thirsty yet I 've not even urine or tears to drink! And OH my GOD how this HELL stinks! AHHHH, I am a Citizen in HELL! There's NO water of any kind not even sweat to cool my brow, I know from Hell I will never be set free and demons curse and mock me! I scream to God to help me! Yet he does NOT hear! Instead the voice of satan laughs and jeers! HaAa! There's NO GOD and there's NO mercy here! I have torture, terror, and Damnation and every kind of FEAR! But there's NO GOD HERE! Hahaha! It's funny the websites address is http://almightywind.com/hell/citizenhell.htm and I'm thinking of "A Mighty Wind". This would be a great folk song. Imagine them singing those lyrics with cheesy smiles on their faces. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthOkkata Posted June 13, 2009 Author Share Posted June 13, 2009 I dunno. 'Almighty Wind' just sounds like something my Dad would say after a gas emission he's particularly proud of after he's already stepped on all the frogs in the room, the whales have returned his calls, and the elephant hiding under his chair fell asleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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