PaulQ Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 I'm on vacation, and have noticed there's a bible in the room of every hotel I've stayed at. Apparently, they were placed by the Gideons (so it says on the cover). The paper isn't any good for rolling doobies, and it's too coarse to use as toilet paper. What do you do with these? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skeptic Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Personally, I would start a bonfire and chuck the bibles in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Marty Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Take them to the front desk and say you do not appreciate bronze age spell books being put in your room without your express permission. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mriana Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 I went to a hotel a few years ago, while at a Star Trek con. (7 years or so ago, can't remember), and I never noticed a Bible. Then again, I didn't actually look for one, so I wasn't paying attention, but now that so many people have brought it up, I'll probably notice next time. What do I do with them? Nothing, since I haven't noticed one in so long, but when I scrounge up enough money to go to that Vegas Trek con (if they still have them when I get money again), I'll be sure to think of what to do with it. Marty, I don't think they are Bronze age. More like Stone Age. Ok the NT might be Bronze Age, but not the OT. The OT is definitely Stone Age. Oh here's and idea... put the book in the trash can. The problem is, unless Consuela, the maid, tells her boss, no one will know you put it into the trash. Now this is something I have noticed, esp around my area- more and more hotel maids are Latinos, who insist they "speak no English". Not that I want her job or anything, but it ceases to amaze me that they get this far into the U.S., get a job (many businesses here have been busted for hiring illegal immigrants, so who knows), and don't speak English. So, they get up to Pentecostal land in SW MO and get a job, knowing no English, what does that say about the business owners, who may or may not be A of G, but many are? Mind you, I don't know if they are illegally here or not, anymore than I know the business owner is A of G, but with so many immigration busts of businesses around here, it makes one wonder. With the quick turn over in hotels, it seems they are either getting away with it or they are being on the up and up. Who knows, but the maid is more noticeable than the Bibles. Oh perfect way to keep the maid from putting it back on the hotel dresser- put day old food and stuff on top of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Paper airplane battle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Ah, I got it. Those babbles really need bookmarks. What a great use for a used condom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neon Genesis Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Write in the bibles the URL for http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/ and highlight major contradictions in the bible? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted June 17, 2009 Super Moderator Share Posted June 17, 2009 Put it in the bathroom on the floor in front of the commode. In fact, see if you can get an extra copy or two. Place your feet on it when you stock the pond with brown trout. The slightly elevated position of your feet helps things along. It's true, no shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentLoner Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Write out funny/thought provoking/ranting messages inside the cover? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShallowByThyGame Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 We really need like a sticker with a surgeon's general warning or something: Caution, use may stunt learning and growth. Has been known to cause violent reactions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Davka Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Leave Cthulhu tracts in them as bookmarks. Seriously, stealing or vandalizing Gideon's Bibles only makes more paying work for the publisher. And without them, the Beatles song "Rocky Raccoon" ceases to make any sense at all. Just stuff them in a drawer and forget about them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deva Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Other than writing subversive messages in them, why bother? Leave it alone and forget it. They will just replace it if you trash it. Who actually opens that drawer anyway except out of idle curiosity? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoustonHorn Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 I actually got drawn into a Gideon meeting back in my church going days. Seems the music minister thought I would be a good fit and gave them my name and number. I went and ate a free hotel chicken meal. Not great, but it was free. What I wasn't ready for was the sales pitch. They almost wouldn't let me out the door without joining. I finally told them that I'd go to one of their breakfast meetings in my area just so I could get out the door, although I actually did go to the breakfast more out of morbid curiosity than anything else. Aparently shorts weren't appropriate attire for the Saturday morning meeting at Denny's because when the leader prayed before we ate he said something along the lines of "thank you for getting us all together and dressed up, some more than others." Obviously, that was my only meeting. I kept getting calls for a few months afterwards reminding me to send in my dues under the disguise of reminders about the next meeting. Sorry for the background. I'm still irritated at the whole process of that stupid organization... Anyway... the bibles are placed there by the Gideons and paid for by their members. The dues that are paid go to the bibles. They wanted me to go and buy a bunch of mini-bibles and then go and hand them out, although they did give me 10 to start. I think I've still got 'em somewhere. They get excited when a bible comes up missing. In their minds it means that someone found Jesus and took the bible home to use. If they find it defaced it means that someone that was under the influence of the devil did it and god was working on their soul. If it's defaced too badly they just replace it. If the cover is torn off, but it's otherwise usable it goes to prisoners. Although seriously, who reads the hotel bibles anyway? Anyone who is going to read the bible before going to sleep probably brings their own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hereticzero Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 I'm on vacation, and have noticed there's a bible in the room of every hotel I've stayed at. Apparently, they were placed by the Gideons (so it says on the cover). The paper isn't any good for rolling doobies, and it's too coarse to use as toilet paper. What do you do with these? Take them with you when you go and dispose of as you like. They are gifts from the Gideon Society. They are not the property of the motel or hotel where you stayed, unless they are marked as such. They are there along with pencils, pens, and writing paper, or the shampoo for you to use or take home. Whenever I go to a motel and see the Gideon Bibles, I am reminded of the Movie 'Coneheads' with Jane Curtin and Bill Murray. There is a scene with them in a motel and Jane, as a conehead, is laying in the bed reading the first book of the Gideon Bible and laughing her head off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neon Genesis Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 We really need like a sticker with a surgeon's general warning or something: Caution, use may stunt learning and growth. Has been known to cause violent reactions.I'm reminded of this bible disclaimer: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 What to do with hotel Bibles? Here's an idea. Get a book about origami. Lots of paper in the Bible to practice on. At the point you reach the New Testament, you will be able to make a pterodactyl to scale, with Noah sitting on its back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OpheliaGinger Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Get pen mark happy, and mark out all the supernatural stuff, mentionings of God, bigoted shit, and anything nonsensical. Hell, even mark out Jesus and replace it with Satan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dagan Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Get a good sharp knife and cut out the shape of a revolver in the pages just to fuck with people's minds. For added effect get a few ketchup packages and squirt them all over the inside cover and slip in a map with red X marks on locations near the hotel. On a side note, a hotel I visited last year had a bible AND a book of Tao teachings in the same drawer! All they need now is a book about how to live free of any mystical teachings and all's well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
white_raven23 Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 I'm as confounded about the presence of the bibles as I am about the hotel dresser drawers. Even when spending several days in a hotel, I've yet to use any drawer provided in any country I've visited. Who walks into a hotel room and completely unpacks? Doesn't this up the odds for forgetting something when you leave? Sure, everyone partially unpacks...you stick your shower stiff in the tub, your makeup and/or contact lens stuff beside the sink, maybe you have a special outfit for a special event...it gets hung lonely and apart from all your other clothes in the closet. But I've yet to see anyone travelling with me start filling those drawers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Perus32 Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 how in this day and age are hotels even allowed to have them there. We live in a multi-cultural society...why are there no Quaran's or Hindu scriptures there? But the main point is...why do we still have any religious texts there!!!??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mwc Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 What do you do with these? Remove. Apply glue. Replace. mwc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LilaMae Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 how in this day and age are hotels even allowed to have them there. We live in a multi-cultural society...why are there no Quaran's or Hindu scriptures there? But the main point is...why do we still have any religious texts there!!!??? Why no Hindu scriptures or the Qur'an? Because of the Christians, of course! The much-persecuted majority would have a gigantic hissy-fit if anyone dared to do such a thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Marty Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 Marty, I don't think they are Bronze age. More like Stone Age. Ok the NT might be Bronze Age, but not the OT. The OT is definitely Stone Age. Well, there's evidence that the OT is actually a lot younger than previously thought, but I do believe that the Moses adventures are supposed to take place in the middle of the bronze age, circa 1500 B.C.E. or so. The OT is definitely not stone age, as the bible talks of metallurgy in ways unknown to stone age peoples. For example, iron chariots and/or swords would not have been around during the stone age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoustonHorn Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 how in this day and age are hotels even allowed to have them there. We live in a multi-cultural society...why are there no Quaran's or Hindu scriptures there? But the main point is...why do we still have any religious texts there!!!??? Probably because other religions aren't as pushy and don't want to spend their money on trying to get others to convert. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vomit Comet Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 I would jack off, use it to catch my spooge while it's open to Song of Solomon, and put it back in the drawer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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