jason197754 Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 HI there. This is Jason again. I'm feeling a whole lot of mixed emotions right now becasue they cut off my disability check totally becasue I'm working now. But I don't make enough or work enough hours to live on my own. And I moved back in with my mom 4 years ago. I've been living with her for about 4 years now but she has a bad drinking problem and abuses me verbally and emotoinally, she did that all the time when I was growing up too!!!! But I don't know what to do!!! What should I do??? I need/want a new place to live and I need/want a new/better job as well!!!! It feels like I'm either on an adventure or I'm spinning out of control!! Any ideas, suggestions or advice???? Thanks.... Jason Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted July 2, 2009 Super Moderator Share Posted July 2, 2009 Sorry about your situation. It won't get fixed overnight, but I'd start looking for another part-time or full-time job and a roommate or two. Local publications, postings for roommates at supermarkets, and Craig's List might help. Perhaps you could get a break on rent by being a handyman or doing lawn maintenance for the building. My BIL found a situation like that on Craig's and could live in a fabulous 1 BR apt. on the Intracoastal waterway for a mere $400 per month (that's REALLY cheap) if he would fix leaky faucets for the other tenants and maintain the pool. Changing just one thing is a start. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I know it seems like a lot on your shoulders, but consider that at least you're healthy enough to work (my heart ain't gettin' no better, divine intervention aside) and you do have options. Florduh's suggestions are all good. Room-mate, side work, even re-location are all options. Consider it a challenge and make the best of every day. You always have the ex-c bunch behind you. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RationalOkie Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I would find an evening job or whatever it took to get out of there. If you can't make enough money from the one job, find another job in the evenings. Do everything you can to be self reliant. This bodes well in nearly every aspect of your life. Good luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulQ Posted July 13, 2009 Share Posted July 13, 2009 Being on the west coast, you're living in one of the cities with a higher cost of living. First step, then, is to identify those cities and/or states with lower costs of living: http://www.missourieconomy.org/indicators/cost_of_living/index.stm Next, you'll want to cross-reference that with cities and/or states that have low unemployment rates: http://jobs.aol.com/articles/2009/01/24/u-s-cities-with-the-highest-and-lowest-unemployment-rates/ Some sites already combine the two in their research, to arrive at the best places to live: http://money.cnn.com/magazines/moneymag/bplive/2009/ Spend some time with Google, see what other sites say. Some of these places may not be as glamorous as San Diego, but you'll find they each have their own charm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShallowByThyGame Posted July 13, 2009 Share Posted July 13, 2009 If you feel the need for something drastic, a strong change of scenery can be healthy, as in a new city, new job, new life. You could also look for a place that need roommates and has low enough rent for you to afford. You could even buy a tent at the army surplus store and live in a park...I know some poor people live in 'tent cities' nowadays. The less you have the easier it is to start over again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongo Posted July 13, 2009 Share Posted July 13, 2009 The nature of your disability is a limiting factor that you have not disclosed. However... In the near term, getting away from mom is a must. Can you find a job that requires travel? If your disability is emotioinal then hard work would be a sure tonic. Logging camp, tree planting yada yada. If it is physical, can you drive a truck or learn to drive one? Don't be a victim. You have choices. Mongo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongo Posted July 13, 2009 Share Posted July 13, 2009 Oh yes... Can you work on an offshore oil rig? It would be better to sweep floors on an oil rig than to sit at Mom's and rot. How about a career in merchant marine. Make life an adventure (because it is one)!!! Mongo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jason197754 Posted July 15, 2009 Author Share Posted July 15, 2009 Well, I tried going to a place called set free, but I think it's really just a gang or something. And I have to quit my job becasue if I keep working I won't get my social security disability check any more at all. But I get more in my monthly check than I would if I was working full time at my job now!!!! So I thought about moving into a group home but I don't know about that. That might not be such a good idea for me. I thought about meeting people at the mall, I can still do that, but I don't know. I mean I want to meet new people and make new friends, but how? How does it work or happen? I mean how do you make new friends and meet new people around your neighborhood? I happen to live in suburbs/older suburbs-Lower middle class. Maybe I need more self-confidence/self-esteem. Any more ideas or suggestions or tips??? Thanks, Jason Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nixie Posted July 15, 2009 Share Posted July 15, 2009 Hmmmmm. How to meet people...... Well, I find that it's easiest to make friends in situations where you'll meet people that have something in common with you. If you like to read or write, meet people at the library. If you like the outdoors, meet people in a park. Personally, I'm into all things alternative/goth/punk/etc. So I go the pubs and nightclubs in my area that play rock/metal/goth/punk music and attract a crowd of crazy nutters like myself. Once you become a regular at a certain place, you notice the other people that are regulars (and they notice you) and you can't help but strike up a conversation. Lucky for me, I'm an extrovert (but when I was little I was terribly shy!) so I make loads of friends this way. But all it really takes is to meet one person, and if you become friends you can meet their entire circle of friends too. For example, my partner isn't very outgoing when it comes to meeting new people, but he always gets on really well with my friends and becomes their friend too. Not everyone is an extrovert, and I'm sure if you even meet one new person you could soon have a whole bunch of really lovely friends. It may seem daunting, but just put yourself out there in a place you feel comfortable and things could really turn around for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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