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Goodbye Jesus

Should I Apologize Or Forget?


Citsonga

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Sounds good...if I'd suggest anything, I'd say you could go even simpler, but I like it as is, too.

Thanks.

 

Before I got back on here and read your post, I added one more brief paragraph (which I've edited into my previous post, starting with, "I actually...."). I don't plan to add anything else.

 

Indeed I didn't want to make the letter too long, but on the other hand I want it to make sense regarding where I'm coming from now. But perhaps you're right that it should be simpler. Should I remove the paragraph about starting to doubt and listing a few Bible problems? It would still make sense without that paragraph, but on the other hand I think including that paragraph would make it less likely for him to wonder if I'm just be pretending to be agnostic.

 

Thanks again....

Just my opinion, but unless he expresses an interest in your particular reasons for rejecting Xtianity (which he may), there is not a need for any explanation. You don't need to convince him that you aren't Xtian or that you had good reasons. He will understand anyway.

 

I like the following, although "name withheld" is a little impersonal. Just kidding.

 

Dear [name withheld],

 

Greetings. You may remember me as one of your brother [name withheld]'s friends, the drummer in the band he played with back in Upland.

 

I would like to apologize for sending you a couple creationism books several years ago. I have since then come to realize that you were right to reject Christianity, and for quite a while now I have felt bad about having intruded on you by sending that propaganda. I meant well when I sent the books, but I now have to acknowledge that I was acting out of a flawed worldview from being brainwashed with nonsense.

 

I would recommend skipping to this part:

 

I am now an agnostic, teetering somewhere between atheist and deist, and I respect you for having the intelligence and freethinking ability to see through the religious nonsense at a much younger age than I did.

 

I actually haven't told your brother any of this, since we've fallen out of touch now that we live so far away, although he did indicate once a few years ago that he sensed that my faith wasn't what it used to be.

 

Anyway, I hope you weren't too offended by the books you received from me. Hopefully you simply found humor in how silly I was being. Regardless, I no longer think that you were blinded from the truth, since it was me and my fellow Christians who were blinded from the truth.

 

In closing, I certainly hope things are going well for you. Take care, and enjoy this journey we call "life."

 

 

Sincerely,

 

But, the choice is yours.

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Goodbye Jesus

Thanks for the responses. I think you're both probably right about the "I began questioning" paragraph not being necessary, so I have deleted it. Due to that deletion, I also changed "I actually haven't told your brother any of this" to "I actually haven't told your brother about this" (since that makes more sense with the whittled down extimony portion). So, here's the current draft:

 

Dear [name withheld],

 

Greetings. You may remember me as one of your brother [name withheld]'s friends, the drummer in the band he played with back in Upland.

 

I would like to apologize for sending you a couple creationism books several years ago. I have since then come to realize that you were right to reject Christianity, and for quite a while now I have felt bad about having intruded on you by sending that propaganda. I meant well when I sent the books, but I now have to acknowledge that I was acting out of a flawed worldview from being brainwashed with nonsense.

 

I am now an agnostic, teetering somewhere between atheist and deist, and I respect you for having the intelligence and freethinking ability to see through the religious nonsense at a much younger age than I did.

 

I actually haven't told your brother about this, since we've fallen out of touch now that we live so far away, although he did indicate once a few years ago that he sensed that my faith wasn't what it used to be.

 

Anyway, I hope you weren't too offended by the books you received from me. Hopefully you simply found humor in how silly I was being. Regardless, I no longer think that you were blinded from the truth, since it was me and my fellow Christians who were blinded from the truth.

 

In closing, I certainly hope things are going well for you. Take care, and enjoy this journey we call "life."

 

Sincerely,

 

Anyway, this is probably the version I'll send, unless there are some other suggestions. It's late now, so I won't bother printing it out tonight. I'll be back on here tomorrow to see if there are other opinions on it.

 

Thanks again....

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Thanks for the responses. I think you're both probably right about the "I began questioning" paragraph not being necessary, so I have deleted it. Due to that deletion, I also changed "I actually haven't told your brother any of this" to "I actually haven't told your brother about this" (since that makes more sense with the whittled down extimony portion). So, here's the current draft:

Thanks again....

Well, I think it's fine.

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Thanks for the additional replies.

 

Paradox-db3: Actually, the chances of me ever just bumping into him are so minuscule that that I may as well call it an impossibility. I've moved out of state and there are roughly 500 miles between us. But I also believe that the chances of him having become a christian are minuscule. After all, if he could be firm in his disbelief among a family full of believers (brother, two sisters, parents & grandparents, as well as the fact that his father is a minister), then I think he was pretty well rooted, and considering that he was really into science and all, I just can't imagine that he'd turn around and follow superstition. But, of course, I couldn't have imagined that I would leave the faith, but I did, so I guess anything's possible, I just really don't expect it. Anyway, thanks for expressing your opinion.

No Prob! You know him better than any of us, so do what feels right to you. :)

Kyle: WWJD? lol, how about:

;)

I think his post was in reference to Jason...What Would Jason Do!

 

Bingo! I saw that shirt at a horror convention and it cracked me up

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To be honest I could not get past the 3rd paragraph of your letter... and in my opinion, too long and self-serving.

 

I once sent an email to a guy thanking him for all the great questions he would ask me when I was a fundy. He was raised Baptist, he was apostate at the time, very intellegent and a horny slut. He once said that if there was a god that I deserved to go to heaven. I guess I was sincere and arguably, sincere search for truth should lead a person straight out of religion.

 

It had been many years but I since found his email on the web and contacted him. On my 2nd email to him, I made a point of thanking him and gave him some measure of credit for my deconversion.

 

He never replied. It leaves me wondering whether he re-converted (I don't consider it likely) to fundamentalism of his childhood and simply felt guilty that he contributed to me falling away. I would like to know but I don't want to intrude.

 

It may also be that he is one of those guys who like to talk about ideas but can't stand a heart to heart, honest conversation. I think many guys get embarassed with their feelings. I didn't think he in particular was that shallow.

 

Anyway, in retrospect, this is more towards what I would write:

 

Dear X,

 

My name is XXXXX and many years ago I sent you books about evolution in hopes of influencing your views.

 

I have gown up alot since then and over time my world views have changed significantly.

 

Sometimes I recall what I did and regret that I tried to convince you that your view was inferior to mine. I no longer see the world that way.

 

I have no idea how you see the world these days but I trust that however you view it, it serves you well.

 

I'm sorry. Back then I was young, ignorant and arrogant. I've since become older and I don't know if anyting else has changed but I hope so.

 

I hope this apology finds you well.

 

Sincerely,

 

XXXXXXXXx

 

Mongo

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Thanks for your perspective, Mongo. I'll have to consider whether or not I should alter my approach. Your suggestion is another decent way to go about it, although I wouldn't use the term "arrogant," because I wasn't arrogant, I was just misinformed. But, yeah, that's a more concise approach. Hmmm....

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To be honest I could not get past the 3rd paragraph of your letter...

 

Now that I think about it, are you referring to the first draft (post #23) or the second draft (post #28)? I ask because the third paragraph in the first draft was deleted for the second draft, and perhaps you were just looking at the first draft.

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Well, after being sidetracked by a family outing and some plumbing work that needed done, I finally got around to mailing the letter today. I took a couple other little things out to make it a little more concise than the second draft I posted.

 

Anyway, if I should happen to hear back from him, I'll post again about it. Otherwise, I expect that this thread will probably drift off into oblivion. ;)

 

Thanks again to each of you for your input.

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