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Goodbye Jesus

I Want To Speak In Tongues


mcpng

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glossolalia....

 

the Rosemary case is interesting though.

 

does anyone know how I can pick up glossolalia or "speaking in tongues"? I'm not a christian.

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Say this phrase rapidly over and over: She got a key to my honda.

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"shaka laka hala"

 

This line of gibberish repeated over and over and over was a favorite by the majority of the flock in my Pentecostal church when I was a kid.

 

For all I know it means "I like it in the ass" in some ancient tongue? :shrug:

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Begin and end with shun da la la.

 

Like this:

 

shun da la la she got a key to my honda shaka laka hala shun da la la

 

practice saying it as fast as you can over and over.

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I think it helps if you throw in the occasional guttural "ch" sound, as in "Loch Ness" or "Chutzpah".

 

When I try glossolalia, I invariably sound like the Swedish Chef reading H.P. Lovecraft backwards... :lmao:

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Is it actually going nuts in gibberish that you want or the mental state where you no longer control your speech and/ or body? I have entered trance states and sang and danced in what must be similar to the pentecostal thing, but I don't have a formula for it. Hypnotic beats, scents and lighting helps for that if you wanted to do it alone. Otherwise its a lot like being hypnotized from what I understand. I never attended a church like that though so I am not experienced there.

 

I guess I don't know why you want to speak in tongues. For fun? To make fun? Or do you want to get something out of it?

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"shaka laka hala"

 

This line of gibberish repeated over and over and over was a favorite by the majority of the flock in my Pentecostal church when I was a kid.

 

For all I know it means "I like it in the ass" in some ancient tongue? :shrug:

 

The #1 hit where I was seemed to be "Ohhhhhh-Buh-Babah-Shawn Buh-Babah Shango!!!"

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Smoke some magic herb and then try to explain quantum physics to your friends.

 

Voilà.

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i just thought it would be fun..

to make fun, but not to make fun in the face of a believing christian. i just thought it'd be great if after i get a 100 on an exam i could say among my atheist friends Oh my god (with not real reference to god) and shaka laka she got my honda shun da la la...

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I used to go to a Pentecostal, charasmatic church. I prayed for the ability to speak in tongues, and one night, while a few people around me at the youth service I was at were speaking in tongues as well, I just randomly started muttering.

 

It was something like "Harrrababbah Shendekiah" - sort of rolling the r's a bit. I always wanted it translated when I was a Christian - it was sort of my one last desperate reach for some proof of gawd's existence - but I now realize it's probably just nonense.

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Boom shaka laka! Ya pow ka ZAM Obama mama drama llama! HOLLA foshizzle ma nizzle!

 

 

 

See? I was raised in a Baptist family, I've never been to a Pentecostal church, and even I can speak in tongues :D

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Along the same lines, how do you get one of those experiences where you feel a oneness with the universe? You know, like those Christians who say they felt the Holy Spirit overcoming them and felt one with the universe or whatever and that was a sign they were saved?

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Along the same lines, how do you get one of those experiences where you feel a oneness with the universe? You know, like those Christians who say they felt the Holy Spirit overcoming them and felt one with the universe or whatever and that was a sign they were saved?

 

I know of a plant that can encourage these sorts of experiences when smoked....

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There are two 80s bands that are big among the goth crowd where the female vocalists did glossolalia all or much of the time. Those would be: 1. Dead Can Dance; 2. Cocteau Twins.

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When I try glossolalia, I invariably sound like the Swedish Chef reading H.P. Lovecraft backwards... :lmao:

:HaHa: Awesome.

 

Here's a tidbit of nonessential information, Henson and friends got the idea to the chef when they went to Sweden, to a small restaurant just a few miles north of where I lived the last years before I mode to US. They had a chef who looked and sounded like that. :grin

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There are two 80s bands that are big among the goth crowd where the female vocalists did glossolalia all or much of the time. Those would be: 1. Dead Can Dance; 2. Cocteau Twins.

 

I love both of those bands... they made some truly beautiful music. Cocteau Twins especially.

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Along the same lines, how do you get one of those experiences where you feel a oneness with the universe? You know, like those Christians who say they felt the Holy Spirit overcoming them and felt one with the universe or whatever and that was a sign they were saved?

 

I think it triggers a dopamine "high" in the brain from all the collective emotional energy. It's like an emotional feeding frenzy.

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Play "Mad Gab" - instant tongue speak!

 

 

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All this speaking in tongues without interpretation, come now people! Ahem...

"Thus saith the Lord of Hosts, I would say unto thee my daughter that the thing you desirest shall surely come to pass, sha ba. For shall I bring the former rain and not the latter? O shala banando. Neither will I snuff out the wick of your faith, but will surely fill you with my glory and you shall be a warrior for me. Yea shea tey halabalamo sha ba. Amen."

 

I swear, the interpretations were always more vague than a horoscope, littered with bits of King James to make it sound more holy, and bits more of "tongues" to increase the sense that something supernatural was happening instead of the reality that the false prophet was wanking off emotionally pretending to be the mouthpiece of God. Like above, nothing at all was really said, and the thing that she "desirest" could be a nice hot time with the pastor's wife. The prophets never really seem to be specific. Or when they rarely are, no one seems to keep track.

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I find that tongues is easily jump-started by slamming ones fingers in a car door. You should be aware, though, that in doing so, you may also jump-start your urinary tract.

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Just take random syllables and string them together. Like "hotukiketa mabuta friyu honbuy wet tra domda."

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I think it helps if you throw in the occasional guttural "ch" sound, as in "Loch Ness" or "Chutzpah".

 

When I try glossolalia, I invariably sound like the Swedish Chef reading H.P. Lovecraft backwards... :lmao:

 

Oh, that is too too funny!!!

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Just say the lord's prayer backwards.

NEMA! LIVEE, MORF SU REVILLED TUB NOISHAYTPMET OOTNI TON SUH DEEL SUS TSHAIGA SAPSERT TAHT YETH. VIGRAWF EU ZA SESAPSERT RUA SUH VIGRAWF DERB ILAID RUA YED SITH SUH VIG NEVEH NI SI ZA THRE NI NUD EEB LIW EYTH MUCK MODNGIK EYTH MAIN EYTH EEB DWOHLAH NEVAH NI TRA CHIOO. RETHARF RUA!

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