Shit That God Wouldn't Give You.

[qec]

Here's something that the SkyDaddy dropped the ball on, and it was the clencher for me. Refer to my second-most-recent post to date in the "23 Minutes in Hell" thread over in Rants and Replies to get the full story.

 

1. I had true love for once in my life. She was a nominal Catholic. We were each other's first true loves.

 

2. I was a virgin and she wasn't. She wanted to make love to me. And I said "fuck it" and was ready to go, because I wanted her so bad and I loved her so much.

 

3. But when the night finally came I thought I received a "sign" from the Skydaddy, so I lost my shit.

 

4. I threw her out of bed and she cried harder than I've ever seen a woman cry.

 

5. Then I dumped her, and it broke her heart into a million pieces.

 

6. She never knew why. She just thought it was because of my religion.

 

7. The truth was this: I thought a demon would enter her through my cock and drive her to madness and suicide. I thought that by keeping my dick in my pants, that I was literally saving her life! But of course I couldn't tell her that. She had no idea about any of it and obviously would not have understood.

 

8. So I prayed and prayed and prayed my little heart out. "Oh Lord, please let her see You in me. Please let her see the example I have set for the faith. Please oh Lord, please let me lead her to the Lord. Then I can love her again and I could marry her, because all I ever wanted was a wife. That's all I've ever asked from you, and you know it."

 

9. The fucking reverse happened. She didn't go from being a nominal Catholic to being a full-blown born again fundie. As a direct result of the disgust and heartbreak my religious faith had caused her, she went from being a nominal Catholic to being a fucking ATHEIST. I was destroyed.

 

10. "Fuck you, Lord! Thanks for fucking nothing. I destroyed my first True Love for you, and you obviously did not give a fuck. You've never done jack shit for me. All your 'Truth' has ever done for me was deprive me of my full humanity. You can lick my asshole while giving me a reach-around, you old cunt."

 

That is so fucked up man, that is so fucked up..... Man... Just man.... You know, I hope you feel better about that one day, find some way to make it right inside yourself at least.