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Goodbye Jesus

World To End On May 27, 2012!


Max

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I love these sites! Don't these people ever start to feel foolish?

 

Robert Weinland predicts that the world will end on May 27, 2012. He says that the "first trumpet" was sounded on December 14, 2008, which is the day that Iraqi dude threw his shoe at Bush. According to Weinland's book, the first trumpet would involve fire from heaven, thunder, lightning, hail mingled with blood, and

much death when this event occurs. Most of it will be the death of animals and birds, but also a large number of people will die—into the tens of thousands.

 

which makes the actual events seem sort of anti-climactic.

 

I thought maybe we could compile these predictions and statistcially determine the REAL date for the end of the world! So far, I have:

 

  • May 27, 2012 from Weinland
  • December 21, 2012 from the Mayan conspiracy theorists
  • February 1, 2010 from this guy
  • September 29, 2011 from this guy
  • sometime in 2026, maybe, according to this guy

 

That gives us a mean of 9/24/2014, with a 95% confidence interval of 11/28/2008 to 7/20/2020.

 

Got any more predictions? The more data we have, the more accurate our results will be! :grin:

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The world will end, for sure, at Now + n hrs from now. (But I won't reveal what the number n is.)

:grin:

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Robert Weinland predicts that the world will end on May 27, 2012. He says that the "first trumpet" was sounded on December 14, 2008, which is the day that Iraqi dude threw his shoe at Bush. According to Weinland's book, the first trumpet would involve fire from heaven, thunder, lightning, hail mingled with blood, and

much death when this event occurs. Most of it will be the death of animals and birds, but also a large number of people will die—into the tens of thousands.

HE'S RIGHT!!!!!

 

Figure 6.5 billion world population and to make things easy assume an average lifespan world wide of 65 years. That's 100 million deaths per year. 1000 days in 3 years so divide by 1000 and multiply by 3 and about 300 thousand people die per day. But that's a modest over estimate, since there's a few more than 1000 days in three years and world population is growing fast, with most of it fairly young, so let's lop off a generous amount and say 200 thousand people die per day or even cut it in half and say 150 thousand if you prefer.

 

Uh oh, clearly a lot more than "tens of thousands" of people died on December 14, 2008! So... that must be the day the first trumpet sounded!

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I love these sites! Don't these people ever start to feel foolish?

 

Robert Weinland predicts that the world will end on May 27, 2012. He says that the "first trumpet" was sounded on December 14, 2008, which is the day that Iraqi dude threw his shoe at Bush. According to Weinland's book, the first trumpet would involve fire from heaven, thunder, lightning, hail mingled with blood, and

much death when this event occurs. Most of it will be the death of animals and birds, but also a large number of people will die—into the tens of thousands.

 

Got any more predictions? The more data we have, the more accurate our results will be! :grin:

 

I will believe the world has come to an end when crazy religious people stop predicting it will end. THEN we're screwed.

 

Ya think?

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Wow, so glad it's going to be the 27th May 2012! I have a large mortgage repayment due on 28th May 2012, so I can have a big spend up after 28th April 2012!

 

Thanks, Weinland, for letting me know! Of course, if it doesn't happen and my house gets repossessed then I'll be suing the pants off him for giving me false advice.

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The world will only end when the last bee disappears.

 

Bees -- nature's timekeepers.

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He says that the "first trumpet" was sounded on December 14, 2008, which is the day that Iraqi dude threw his shoe at Bush.

:lmao: That says it all right there for me.

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He says that the "first trumpet" was sounded on December 14, 2008, which is the day that Iraqi dude threw his shoe at Bush.

:lmao: That says it all right there for me.

 

gawd should really look into buying some better trumpets

 

 

or he could always toot my horn, if ya know what i mean :blowjob:

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<mini rant>

The problem with people saying the Mayans knew the world was going to end on 12/21/12 is that this is ONLY the Gregorian date of when THEIR calendar ends, in the longest cycle. The Mayan calendar is very complex, and has cycles within cycles, so that day is simply the end of the longest era, as it were. And it acts like all other calendars, it JUST STARTS OVER. This is like getting to the end of a wall calendar, and going "OMG, there's no date after 12/31/09, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIIIIEEEE!!!" In short, the Mayans are laughing at stupid white people.

</mini rant>

As to the rest, the "end" has been coming since late Roman times. I believe the end was also supposed to come in the 19th century. Then the 20th. Then right at the beginning of 21st. Sane people don't care anymore. Except for a bit of amusement, I suppose.

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Robert Weinland predicts that the world will end on May 27, 2012

 

Absolutely, postitively true. Unless of course I receive 1 million (cash preferred) before then to appease gawd for y'all's sins. Respond now, and I'll throw in "I stopped the Apocalypse" t-shirt and a "gawd is my co-pilot 'cause I can't drive" bumper sticker.

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Robert Weinland predicts that the world will end on May 27, 2012

 

Absolutely, postitively true. Unless of course I receive 1 million (cash preferred) before then to appease gawd for y'all's sins. Respond now, and I'll throw in "I stopped the Apocalypse" t-shirt and a "gawd is my co-pilot 'cause I can't drive" bumper sticker.

 

I already have one of those shirts from last time. Do I get a discount for this one?

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<mini rant>

The problem with people saying the Mayans knew the world was going to end on 12/21/12 is that this is ONLY the Gregorian date of when THEIR calendar ends, in the longest cycle. The Mayan calendar is very complex, and has cycles within cycles, so that day is simply the end of the longest era, as it were. And it acts like all other calendars, it JUST STARTS OVER. This is like getting to the end of a wall calendar, and going "OMG, there's no date after 12/31/09, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIIIIEEEE!!!" In short, the Mayans are laughing at stupid white people.

</mini rant>

 

 

YES. Thank you. The people who run around shrieking about this make me want to smack a bitch. Of course their calender ends! It's a calender! It does that! And they stopped making calenders after a while, you know, after their civilization petered out. It's like crying over an ancient Egyptian calender running out, and everyone thus assuming the END OF THE WORLD will come about. For fuck's sake, the indigenous Americans weren't stupid, but they didn't predict the end of the bloody world in such an obvious manner. We have all sorts of animal myths for that.

 

Besides, it can't end in 2012. Back To The Future II is partially in 2015. I want my hoverboard before I die, damn it!

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I will believe the world has come to an end when crazy religious people stop predicting it will end. THEN we're screwed.

 

Ya think?

 

You know, I used to think the same thing in my Jesus believing days. That the world would end when people quit predicting it. Something along the lines of Yahweh getting pissed about people trying to predict his timetable, and delaying it every time somebody said they knew when the end would come.

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My friend is going to be terribly disappointed if the world ends May 2012. His birthday is December 21st, and he's looking forward to getting very drunk. That way, if the world does end* according to the Mayan calendar, he's drunk. If the world doesn't end, he's drunk on his birthday! He's got the whole thing planned out!

 

*Note, neither of us actually believe the world will end. It's just a pleasant excuse for a huge birthday party.

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As to the rest, the "end" has been coming since late Roman times. I believe the end was also supposed to come in the 19th century. Then the 20th. Then right at the beginning of 21st. Sane people don't care anymore. Except for a bit of amusement, I suppose.

 

But those guys didn't know what their talking about. The Mayans though, there gold, they knew shitloads about astronomy and everything, of course they know when the world is going to end. :lmao:

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As to the rest, the "end" has been coming since late Roman times. I believe the end was also supposed to come in the 19th century. Then the 20th. Then right at the beginning of 21st. Sane people don't care anymore. Except for a bit of amusement, I suppose.

 

But those guys didn't know what their talking about. The Mayans though, there gold, they knew shitloads about astronomy and everything, of course they know when the world is going to end. :lmao:

 

Their world ended when the Spanish came and stole their gold and killed lots of them and gave smallpox to the rest.

 

So their calendar was wrong after all, we've got nothing to worry about!

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As to the rest, the "end" has been coming since late Roman times. I believe the end was also supposed to come in the 19th century. Then the 20th. Then right at the beginning of 21st. Sane people don't care anymore. Except for a bit of amusement, I suppose.

 

But those guys didn't know what their talking about. The Mayans though, there gold, they knew shitloads about astronomy and everything, of course they know when the world is going to end. :lmao:

 

Their world ended when the Spanish came and stole their gold and killed lots of them and gave smallpox to the rest.

 

So their calendar was wrong after all, we've got nothing to worry about!

Actually, that was the Aztecs. The great Mayan civilizations had undergone a largely self-induced disintegration even before the Aztecs were a great power.

 

You gotta know your Kukulcan from your Queztalcoatl if the world comes to an end as the result of the Mayan "prophecy". (Hint: Worship the former, not the latter).

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Shy :HaHa: anthro-nerd high-five!

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The February 1st deadline has just been updated to April 1. See here. I guess gawd must've been running late! :grin:

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According to Weinland's book, the first trumpet would involve fire from heaven, thunder, lightning, hail mingled with blood, and much death when this event occurs.

 

 

 

Poor man. I should find him so I can apologize. I'm afraid it's my fault.

 

See, that wasn't a trumpet that was heard. That was one of my farts. While it's true that it caused a great fire and sounded like thunder, etc., I refuse to take any responsibility for the deaths I caused this time. OH NO.

 

Jack

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As to the rest, the "end" has been coming since late Roman times. I believe the end was also supposed to come in the 19th century. Then the 20th. Then right at the beginning of 21st. Sane people don't care anymore. Except for a bit of amusement, I suppose.

 

But those guys didn't know what their talking about. The Mayans though, there gold, they knew shitloads about astronomy and everything, of course they know when the world is going to end. :lmao:

 

Their world ended when the Spanish came and stole their gold and killed lots of them and gave smallpox to the rest.

 

So their calendar was wrong after all, we've got nothing to worry about!

Actually, that was the Aztecs. The great Mayan civilizations had undergone a largely self-induced disintegration even before the Aztecs were a great power.

 

You gotta know your Kukulcan from your Queztalcoatl if the world comes to an end as the result of the Mayan "prophecy". (Hint: Worship the former, not the latter).

 

Dammit, Kukulcan, Queztalcoatl, Chocobo, you've seen one giant snake-bird-god, you've seen 'em all!

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Dammit, Kukulcan, Queztalcoatl, Chocobo, you've seen one giant snake-bird-god, you've seen 'em all!

Only to the unbeliever.

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  • 1 month later...

I just checked back, and the end of the world has now been moved back to Rosh Hashanah, 2010. Do you think this guy even knows when Rosh Hashanah is?

 

visit the goofey site

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