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What Is The Most Annoying Type Of 'christian'?


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What the title says.

 

Not looking for broad answers like 'Baptists', 'Catholics', or any particular denomination. It's something a bit more specific than that.

 

What kind of 'Christan' annoys you the most? The kind of aneurysm inducing idiocy that just sets you off immediately. The sort of person that just hits that particular button for you personally and makes you go...

 

fffffffffffffffuuuuuuuu.png

 

Even Christians on the site are welcome to add to this one, as it's about the 'worst case' kind of people, and even they can be supremely annoyed by the stupidity of their own kind sometimes.

 

This one is about venting, so if you've got more than one type that really bugs the hell out of you, feel free to list as many as you want. Any Christian that makes your brain want to run away screaming for it's own sanity as soon as you realize it's that particular kind of stupid.

 

The kind of Christian I find the most annoying is the one who believes that everyone that doesn't really love their personal idea of Jesus is 'pretending'. The type that thinks that everyone actually really does believe that Jesus is the Savior and Son of God, but just won't admit it. As if it's some sort of obvious undeniable fact that no one could possibly miss.

 

We just deny it and doom ourselves to an eternity of torment to be jerks for no good reason.

 

I have difficulty being civil to this type, and I've come close to inflicting bodily harm upon several such people before. Now, I just avoid it as soon as I hear the argument come up. Except on the internet that is. There's no danger of being arrested if I lose my temper and they deserve to be yelled at for being that stupid if I do.

 

Also, don't fucking wake me up in the morning. I hate that shit. If I come to the goddamn door looking like I just woke up, I most certainly do not want to 'talk with you about Jesus'. I want you to go the hell away right now so I can go back to sleep. I don't want to read the book of Mormon, nor do I give a shit how young, cheerful, and perky you are. In fact, that shit just makes it worse. I do not care who sent you. Go-the-fuck-away. You have caught me at the moment I am least likely to talk with you about anything, much less stupid shit I don't believe in the first place.

 

If you wake me up, I want to hear one of two things. "Hey! [some bad shit is happening] you need to run for your life!" or "Sorry to bother you, I'll come back later." [and maybe 'would you like to buy some cookies?]

 

That's it. Nothing else. That is the complete extent of any conversation I'm willing to have with someone who got my ass to crawl out of bed.

 

So, what type of Christian bothers you the most?

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Mind if I bring this back up?   1. The pseudo intellectual douchebags who think they are so smart by being illogical. When they ignore the laws of logic and reason, they'll claim that those are ma

'Prayer Warriors', one of the shittiest titles for someone who thinks they are heroic for doing absolutely nothing.

A live one.

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A live one.

 

LOL, hehe.

 

I'm annoyed by the "we'll pray for you" condescending self-righteous ones. And also the f*ckers who put a sticker on their car that says, "Real men follow Jesus" - aaaaargh!

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"Ex-Wiccans." Dear weeping busty Goddess, they make me want to pop their little fucking self-righteous "I know what you believe, where you are, how angry you are at gawd, and you just need to drop the devil worship and come back to White Republican Jesus and stop being an evil lesbian, don't deny it, that's what you are, a devil-worshiping lesbian witch, JUST REPENT, I KNOW, I'VE BEEN THERE!!!" heads off.

This is a highly personal dislike, but that's what you asked. I fucking, absolutely, loathe, despise, HATE HATE HATE the ex-wiccan, saved by Jeeeeeeeebus from evil debbil worship christards. They're so annoying, it makes me want to rip my eyes out.

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You're right I did ask. It's therapeutic...

 

relaxletitgo2.jpg

 

Also, living Christians annoy me too. :wicked:

 

I was looking for something a bit more specific and less generalized than simply all of them. :scratch:

 

This thread is about the ones that really stand out and deserve a special commendation for their achievements in annoyance.

 

That T-shirt reference is a fine example of what I mean. People like that get a Gold Star for being special.

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The kind that automatically assume I'm some kind of spiritual retard for no longer being a christian, and the kind that physically recoil when I tell them I don't think I believe in god anymore, even though they have known me for over twenty years and they know I don't have an evil bone in my body. Fuckers.

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The lukewarm apathetic types that believe people are going to hell, but don't want to do anything about it. The ones who want

the feel good emotions, but don't want to be inconvenienced by actually living what they believe.

 

I don't mind moderate christians who believe good people go to heaven and the ones who think god can be found via many religions. I mean the ones who want the extremist beliefs and a passive life.

 

I actually prefer crazy fundies who wave signs to these people.

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The ones who claim they didn't know what love was before they got saved, therefore unbelievers must have never experienced TRUE love for anyone or anything -- just lust and selfish reliance on others. Nor can I stand the ones who claim they used to think the same way I do until they placed their faith in Christ -- as if I was never a believer to begin with. Obviously, they didn't or they wouldn't have placed their faith in Christ. I also get the impression that they're just quoting lines from Christian movies so they can re-manufacture a touching moment. Fuck, they're such douchebags.

 

Also the type of people who actually think Josh McDowell, Lee Strobel, Kirk Cameron, and Hank Hanegraff actually have any valuable/transformational information for an unbeliever. Obviously these douchebags haven't thought anything through.

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Imposing Bible Thumpers who insist that you need to convert.

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The Christians like my oldest brother, ones who claim to be led by god, not in just a general what the bible says sense, but constantly hearing or feeling the direction of god, are the ones that bother me the most. Like August said above, he claims to be an instrument of god, manifesting a special love that I can't understand, while manifesting nothing but annoying preachiness, and the same tired Christian harangues. He's not evidenced any supernatural love that I can see. He left out Mother hanging in the lurch, and broke his promises to her. It's funny how god always seems to want what my brother wants.

 

He tries to argue with me, while maintaining that my reason and logic are of the devil. I tie him in logical knots every time he starts. He's stopped coming around. I guess god told him to stop. Really, I'm a challenge to the beliefs that he still possesses, and a bolster to the doubts he's trying to get rid of. He's not trying to convince me, so much as he's trying to convince himself. Anyway, that's the kind that makes me want to breathe fire, the holier-than-thou but really can't deal with real life set.

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The Christians like my oldest brother, ones who claim to be led by god, not in just a general what the bible says sense, but constantly hearing or feeling the direction of god, are the ones that bother me the most. Like August said above, he claims to be an instrument of god, manifesting a special love that I can't understand, while manifesting nothing but annoying preachiness, and the same tired Christian harangues. He's not evidenced any supernatural love that I can see. He left out Mother hanging in the lurch, and broke his promises to her. It's funny how god always seems to want what my brother wants.

 

He tries to argue with me, while maintaining that my reason and logic are of the devil. I tie him in logical knots every time he starts. He's stopped coming around. I guess god told him to stop. Really, I'm a challenge to the beliefs that he still possesses, and a bolster to the doubts he's trying to get rid of. He's not trying to convince me, so much as he's trying to convince himself. Anyway, that's the kind that makes me want to breathe fire, the holier-than-thou but really can't deal with real life set.

The next time he stumbles or stubs his toe, ask him if God's toe hurts.

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There are two types that really annoy me. First are the Bible-waving screamers who come around college campuses every spring and stand in the Free Speech area and scream at students, calling the passing females fornicators and yelling that the guys are all going to Hell. These seem to be the ones most often caught with their peckers in the wrong places.

 

The second are the silver-haired men who comb their hair straight back, and the women whose hair is mostly hairspray, and are too perfectly groomed, and dressed in polyester clothing in pastel colors, over-sized gold wristwatches and rings, and have plastic smiles on their faces. They don’t even have to say anything. Just looking at them gives me the creeps.

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I must say, there are some things about weirdo Xians that give me silent mental remarks like George in "Dead Like Me". Picture my mental thoughts being the same tone of voice as hers:

 

The weirdo on the bus who says, "Christianity is not a religion." Then dreamily saying as though he is in luuuve, "It's a relationship."

 

Me: You have sex with a dead man?

 

Former employer: "I'm immortal! I'm immortal!"

 

Me: Step outside during a drive by and we'll see just how immortal you are.

 

Same former employer: "He has risen! He has risen!"

 

Me looking out the window: Yup! The sun has risen.

 

I have a million of them and they always end up seeming funny later, esp when I run them past other freethinkers.

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The majority of ones I have to deal with on a regular basis. Nothing brings home their evil warped thinking and lunacy like those you have to deal with on a regular basis.

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For me, the most annoying kind are the ones on public message boards that dump heaps and heaps of words, full of their bullshit. Writing ten paragraphs while I reply with three sentences and then they accuse me of logical fallicies because supposedly I don't address the things they wrote. They seem to porpusefully misinterperet certain things I say when they're plainly obvious. Acting like what they write is setting some kind of standard when they're just trolling. They can never prove their point with few words so instead they create a network of logic hoops desinged to mindscrew me and waste my my time. Then at the end they throw three bable verses, as if a non-christian like me gives a fuck.

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I don't like the money grubbers. Rod Parsely, Benny Hinn, help me feed kids in India and check out my new corvette preachers. Those bastards that ask for a credit card... Those bastards that push tithing which was mainly supposed to feed Levite Preists which is why its always "first fruits" and "ten of the harvest". The new money grubbers act like it buys miracles.. the ultimate snake oil salesman that prey on the the people that need help the most.

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I don't like the money grubbers. Rod Parsely, Benny Hinn, help me feed kids in India and check out my new corvette preachers. Those bastards that ask for a credit card... Those bastards that push tithing which was mainly supposed to feed Levite Preists which is why its always "first fruits" and "ten of the harvest". The new money grubbers act like it buys miracles.. the ultimate snake oil salesman that prey on the the people that need help the most.

 

That's the sort of thing I'm only familiar with on television, and I haven't exposed myself to it since the eighties.

 

Out of sight, out of mind I guess. I hadn't thought about it for a while, but these 'people' [in the loosest sense of the word] deserve more than just a gold star for exemplary irritation, but an orange jumpsuit and some matching bracelets as well.

 

Asking for donations is one thing, that doesn't bother me a bit. The sort of shit I think you're talking about is the essence of evil itself.

 

Here, have some death metal, it will make you feel better.

 

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When I was still a Christian I couldn't stand "Super Christians." At fellowship meeting thingies they would go on and on about how they wake up at 5 in the morning and pray for an hour and do devotionals before they go out jogging, and then they pray some more after they get back from jogging. Did I mention they praise God while jogging? And they go on and on about how God has called (read: chosen) them to do this or that amazing project. And of course, they'd try to come off as humble and genuine, and everybody else would buy it.

 

[Five hours later] "Isn't [super Christian] such an amazing example of God's power? I mean, just the other day I saw her witnessing to a group of teenagers at the mall, and two of them were crying..."

 

:jerkoff:

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I love this! A place to rant where I can drop F-bombs, be completely irreverent, and laugh.

 

The type of Christians I most dislike are those that I know who tell me that my life would be better if only I would accept Jesus as my personal savior. This implies that I am somehow being punished for not doing that. I have had a lot of nastiness going on in my life, and they know it. They "care" about me, and only want metro feel Jesus' love.

 

Even worse is the type who tells me that since I once was saved, I'm still saved because Jesus loves me and is waiting for mew to come back.

 

One lady asked me yesterday, "Don't you believe that Jesus loves you?" I said, "No because I don't believe he exists." She said, "If you would just ask him for help, he would strengthen your faith." I don't want my faith strengthened. I have none. 0 plus 0 is still 0.

 

And don't even get me going about the condescension! Bastards!

 

Why can't they honor what I believe? They don't even care. That leads me to another type of Christian I can't stand. The ones who won't listen. I'm not trying to change what they think. I'm just trying to be true to myself. Why is that so difficult for them to understand? I was saved once, but I never really got into the Christianity thing hook, line, and sinker.

 

I think my solid non-faith bothers them because somewhere in their brains they know they are being silly, believing in Sky Daddy.

 

Phew! Thanks. I needed that. Now maybe I won't tell off one of them today. I work in a place that is filled with them, and they know exactly where I stand. I don't mind talking to them about it, but they've been getting to me lately because life has been really, really hard. They have been preying on me relentlessly. Pun intended.

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I dislike stiff, humorless fundys that can't even stand to hear mild profanity. The type that will walk out of a room of people because someone says a cuss word in a movie.

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P.S. How do I change the "curious" thing that's on the left of my posts? I'm not curious. I know exactly where I stand. Thanks.

Comes with how many posts you make

 

post like 50 you will get doubter, or soemthing like that

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Creationist of any sort

theistic evolutionists fine but i cant stand 6 day bible creationists

Same here.

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