The Challenges You Face

[Reach]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

[Mr. Neil]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

I can honestly say that I don't have very many challenges. I mean, my family has more or less accepted my position, and my friends know too. Nobody really gives me a hard time about it. Sometimes they'll ask me how life got here and things like that. I just tell them the truth; I don't know. I know very few people who browbeat my atheism, and those that do are not my friends.

 

The greatest challenge, I guess, is just ignoring the idiots.

 

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

I guess if I could change anything, it would be to get religion out of politics and science. I used to be able to look at Christianity with a sense of awe, because one of the cool things about becoming an atheist is that you realize that mythology still exists in the world. I thought it was kind of cool. But the explicitly anti-scientific movement of creationism and intelligent design has spoiled that for me, and I feel as though I've been robbed of an appreciation for the sort of mythicism found in the Bible. Sometimes I really wish I could go back to that.

 

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

I think my attitude has aided in changing people's minds about atheists. It's funny how shocked people are when they find that I don't believe, because I'm not anywhere near as obnoxious as I am online. I really love the people in my life, and I think that sort of kindness goes a long way in changing people's perceptions about atheists. I think it's the right approach to take.

[doomguarder]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

In TX, it can be hard to escape the evangelicals and their foot solders. But outside of the oddball who is out looking for a debate to lead to conversion, not many problems at all. Hubby is agnostic, parents are deists, sister is pagan of sorts. None of them like to talk about religion with me, but that is as I like it. I would rather seek out discussion on the subject than be confronted with it antagonistically, which has happened.

 

The most difficult part of growing up atheist was the lack of peers. I found very few atheists in HS or even in college. Most who were not Christian were agnostic, and really didn’t have a position on the subject. I was never into the touchy feely pagan/wiccan groups I came in contact with, and found some of them to be just as pushy as the Christians. It was not until I was in my late 20s that I began really finding other atheists to share ideas and talk with. I have friends of many faiths, but the theists don’t even bring up the subject with me and I offer them the same courtesy.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

I agree with Neal. Keep them out of politics, science & other secular institutions. Being Christian should not exclude you from serving, but acting only on that faith rather than fulfilling the duties of the office should never be accepted.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

 

I am a very up beat person in RL. I am also very compassionate and often go out of my way to help others. People who deal with me are often very surprised to find that I am an atheist, and to find I have such a harsh view of organized religion.

 

Being an ethical person in a demonstrable way is the best thing all of us can do to revise the warped view of atheists carried by many people of faith.

 

 

 

BTW: Good topic Reach

[Guest Challenger]

(Reach)

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

For me, I haven't seen being a non-Christian as being a problem for me, not at all. It's been some of the Christians who from time to time have a had a problem with it. Of those whom I speak of they seem to think I have a "hardened" heart that is keeping me, like many, many others, from accepting Christ.

 

Like some of the others here, some Christians have been surprised to learn that I'm an atheist. I take their acceptance of that as a compliment.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

I can't think of anything I'd change; however, if someone were to point out something about myself I'm not noticing, being too close to the action, so to speak, and if I agreed with what they said, then I would make an effort to change.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

 

I choose not live in fear, despite the difficulties and challenges of today's world. Which doesn't mean I don't show concern, but I don't let them overwhelm me.

 

And I concur with doomguarder: this is a great topic!

[All Gods Fail]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

I live in Grand Rapids, MI - home of the Calvinist Church and Amway. Most of my friends are non-christians, but they are a tiny minority. Every other car has some stupid xtian fish on it, and every once in a while you see one of those 'scripture' cars plastered with quotes. Honestly, I don't dare criticize god too loudly around here. A friend of mine once had a cable-access show where he parodied an evangelical preacher - and he got death threats.

 

So I try and keep a low profile.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

Aside from the obvious fantasy of everyone waking up and going 'Holy crap - this bible shit is stupid', there's no single thing I could think of. I might step quietly around this town concerning jebus, but being an atheist has been one of the most rewarding, freeing things I've ever done. Changed my whole life for the better - I mostly feel sorry for the angry, hateful xtians who have so little faith they are threatened by somebody who doesn't believe.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Plenty - it's easy to be bitter about my experiences with xtianity. Real easy. It cost me many years of my life, like being falsely imprisoned. But in the end, it's my life and mine alone. I can either be pissed off at all the crap, or let it go and enjoy life a lot more.

 

That doesn't mean I'll forget what happened to me, or let xtians try to take over the government and dictate belief. But in the end, xtians can't hurt me anymore with their cosmic boogeymen and eternal threats. That's key to dealing with day to day crap.

[Amethyst]

At work, I am surrounded by Christians of various denominations. Some of them are Catholics. Some of them are Protestants. I have to share a cube with a born-again Evangelical type who keeps trying to turn 90% of our conversations into religious debates. It drove me up the wall so much that I finally asked my boss if I could have a new cube because he was irritating. Because of the debates, pretty much everyone knows I'm not Christian. I didn't want to come out of the closet, but I was pretty much forced out. The reason I couldn't get a new cube before was because there was literally no extra space until they laid off a few people.

 

Most Minnesotans are moderate to liberal Christians, although a few, like in the church where I grew up, are ultra right-wing conservatives and Bible thumpers. It's not very good socially to criticize Christianity. My relatives are also very religious, and I don't dare tell anyone other than my parents, who know me well enough to know that I'm not religious. When I'm at family gatherings, I do my best to keep my mouth shut and not discuss religion or politics with people. Most of them know I'm an "evil" liberal anyway.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

Most of my relatives deconverting at once would be nice, but that's not going to happen anytime soon. In fact, most of them are probably lifers. I wish that they would become more open-minded, but I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon, either.

 

The greatest improvement for me would be knowing that my friends and family would accept me as I am and not try to reconvert me, pray for me, nag me about going to church, etc. And most of all, not condemn me for not being Just Like Them .

 

I also wish I could also take religion out of politics, but that's not going to happen for at least a century or two.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

 

Very. I try to not let it get to me. Sometimes I succeed. And sometimes, I don't. Otherwise, I wouldn't be human.

[Alice]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

I think the biggest challenge I've faced in my day to day life has been trying to work out what my deconversion means for my marriage. We had a very 'there are three of us in this marriage' kind of marriage - in a me/him and God kind of way, so its a major adjustment. Our boundaries and expectations were very much based on evangelical christian models of marriage.

 

Loosing this basis has been very scary and destabilising to some extent. We used to prayer together and build our week around our church attendence.

 

There are still a lot of christians amoungst my friends and family but the ones that remain are all nice christians. One or two have some terribly frustrating blinkers in some areas (but I think these people would be terribly frustrating without their religion - their politics suck as well! - And in the UK this is very separate to faith)

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

I guess it would be a marriage one again. The greatest improvement for me would be to get back the stability and security I felt (and my hubby felt) when our marriage had these clear perameters (but I'd like it to be because we wanted stability - not because it was imposed on us as it was previously)

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

 

Its vital.

 

 

[Kalidasa]

This is an excellent topic Reach

 

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

I live in a town of about 10 and a half thousand people, smack in the middle of what can be considered a miniature Bible belt. Religion has a firm grip on my local area - in my hometown alone, there are one Christian pre-school, one Christian K-12 school and two Catholic schools, along with a Presbyterian, an Uniting, an Anglican, and a Catholic church. I live just down the street from the Anglican church, I went to the Christian pre-school for a year, and I spent seven years at the K-12 school (grades 6-12 if anyone wants specifics). In addition, religious education is a compulsory part of public schooling. The only way out is to have a note from your parents excusing you from it.

 

I suppose I can attribute the time I spent at private school as a major contributing factor in my deconversion. If I'd remained at public school, I'd most likely still be a Christian. But I saw the dark side of religion before I even turned 16, and I got myself out before it was too late. Sometimes I do wish that I'd waited a few more years, because almost as soon as I ditched religion people I thought were friends turned on me. When you're going through a personal crisis, you really do find out who your true friends are.

 

All my family and most of my friends are also Christian. But we have a policy of keeping our mouths closed on the subject. My friends have learned the hard way (read: copping the silent treatment whenever they tried to ask me if I had returned to Christianity) not to talk to me about religion, and I in turn keep my atheism/Wicca to myself.

 

I think my greatest challenge is keeping my thoughts on religion to myself. I watch my friends unwittingly hurting themselves by allowing themselves to be mired in religion, and I wish I could get them to see the light. But I keep my mouth closed, because it's hard enough for me to make friends as it is, and I'd rather not damage the friendships I've managed to salvage from the hell that was high school.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

I would no longer be living where I do. I have to drive past three churches and one of the Catholic schools just to get to the centre of town. My goal is to be the hell out of Australia within the next ten years, because I am sick of it here. A fresh start might just be what I need.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

It's absolutely vital. I figure that my friends have most likely been told that atheists are the world's worst people and are in desperate need of 'saving'. I've been told that I'm one of the most Christian-like people - in that I epitomise the 'good' qualities of Christianity - and I'm not even a Christian anymore. I'm still not sure what I should think of that! *chuckles* But my point is that if my friends want to see the positive side of atheism, all they have to do is spend a bit of time with me - not to sound up myself, of course. I don't need to be saved - I already saved myself almost six years ago.

[Dianka]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

 

<Sigh> I thought that, because I live in Chicago, I would not catch too much shit for being an Atheist. I haven't met too many people that are true Christians, so there really shouldn't be a problem, right? Wrong. WRONG!!! I don't care to settle down and get married anytime soon, but when I am ready, I think I am going to have to take a lot of shit. I have already taken shit for being "unethical" because I don't believe in God.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

 

I wish my twin sister would read into theological debates for the existence of God. I am closer to her that anyone else on Earth, but there is a rift between us when we talk about God.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

 

In both cases, I would love to have an open discussion with people if they had any questions. I don't want to push my beliefs on other people, so I will wait until they open up the discussion. I hope my sister comes around, but until then I wait patiently.

[Lizard]

Relative to where you live, with whom you might live, your age and working environment, social circle or family relationships, or any other conditions that significantly effect your personal day to day life, what are the greatest challenges you face in being a non-Christian in your world?

Most people around me are either Baptist or Catholic, but very few are outspoken about it. There seems to be an assumption on the part of the Christians that everyone must be Christian, while those who are not cannot understand fully why those who believe, do.

Challenges at home are nonexistant, but at work I've had a few strong reactions. Last year, at my other school, one of my employees was offended by a little buddha statue that was a "joke" gift from another employee. It also effected us at Christmas time, in that this same woman would turn the radio down when a "christmas" song came on. Not the religious "O Holy Night" types, which are rarely played on secular radio, but things like "Frosty, the Snowman" and "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas" (two of my faves, as I love snow and never get to see it, here in south Texas)

For this year, I'm in a new place and at least three of them are Catholic, but not "in your face", in general. Frosty the Snowman will not be an issue and buddha gets chuckles from them all.

In my household, only my BIL goes to church, usually Sunday night just before going to play pool. He never talks about it though, just says its "nice." More like a social outlet than any real attachment to religion. I read him and my husband bits from here, and they find it amusing.

 

If you could change any one circumstance that would make the greatest improvement for you, altering your world in significant, positive ways, what would that be? Or would you require several changes in circumstances?

On a personal level, none. I don't have anyone trying to evangelize me other than the few Mormons, JW's and the ladies from the Baptist church who stop by every few months inviting me to services.

 

How important a role does your attitude play in dealing with the stuff you face on a regular basis?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Attitude effects everything we do, how we approach things. I tend to be on the optimistic side and approach things with amusement. Most things for most people are taken way to seriously. While there are times to BE serious, in day to day interactions, most are not.

Anger and fear are driving forces for a lot of people around me. Anger that they "have" to do more than the next guy, and fear that they won't get their fair share. This is something I see at work often.

That sense of selfishness, while not always a bad thing is too often taken to extremes. That "its not MY job" attitude, rather than, "we have a job to complete, lets work together and get it done permeates strongly. I guess if I could change something, it would be that. Sad thing is, the ones with that attitude the strongest..are the Christians around me..go figure..