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Goodbye Jesus

Wedding in a pentecostal church


thomas

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Yesterday a sister to my wife was married in a pentecostal church.

 

In order to give you a little background, about 10 years ago this church acquired a new fancy church building where they since have been trying to have a seeker sensitive Willow Creek kind of church. Prior to that my wife and I have been members there, but in search for a better version of Christianity we moved our membership.

 

I went there with mixed feelings. I had been in this church a couple of times after they got their new building, but it was the first time I was going there an ex-christian. And I knew very well, that beneath the seeker sensitive style, the church was still nothing but a fundy pentecostal cult.

 

On the way to the church we had agreed to drive by the house of blind man and take him by our car to the church. On the way in our car, we talked with this blind man about his computer and software he had to read text in mails etc. so he could listen to his mail. And the he told that he had got some spam mail about something called Viagra. And then he asked me what this Viagra was all about. And quite frankly, I felt embarrassed and did not know exactly how to explain this to a blind unmarried christian man, while my children and wife was sitting in the back of the car. But I did say, that it was some pills for people who wanted to have sex and have more sex than they else would be capable of having. And his spontaneous reaction was to say (I do not know exactly how to translate) something like: “Oh no, how dirty”.

 

But the church was not as bad a my worst nightmares. Nobody asked about my current church relations. One lady wanted to know, if I had been in their church building before. I think see was very proud of the building. But else, I was mostly greeted like an old friend, it was good to meet again.

 

The only exception was the assistant pastor, who was going to perform the wedding. We had known each other for years, and although we never really had been friends, we had been serving in a small church together. When he first saw me at the wedding, he behaved like he had not seen me at all and walked in a direction away from me. So as he walked I turned my head and kept looking at him, and then he turned around and came over to greet me. But he did it very shortly, and he did not ask for any updates on my church situation. Last time I had been talking with him, he had asked for such update and was very surprised (he spontaneously said something like: “Oh no, you are kidding”), that I had moved back to Church of the Nazarene. But this time he did not ask, and I did not have to explain.

 

The program for the service was a very simple one with a few traditional psalms, preaching, wedding etc. There were no worship choruses and no speaking in tongues or anything like that. An electronic keyboard served as church organ, and it sounded just awful. The keyboard was basically okay, but the settings, with some wired kind of vibrato (or whatever it was), made it sound just like an old American Pentecostal church, or as others would say, it sounded like a “porno” organ.

 

But the preaching was by far the worst thing at the wedding. The assistant pastor said he had a personal message for the couple, about building a strong life, that could stand the storms of life. And then he went to the sermon on the mount where he found three principles for getting such a life. And these three principles were offerings (receiving from god and giving to others), prayer and fasting.

 

There were really nothing new in the preaching, but I did not see how it could count as a personal message to the couple, and I did not find it a valuable basis for building a strong marriage either. While the preacher talked about fasting, my wife (now a liberal Christian) could not take it anymore. When the pastor said, that fasting was about setting something good aside in order to concentrate on something even better, my wife whispered to the person beside her: “That’s why we do not go to church. We are fasting from it”.

 

But else we did have a good day and a good wedding party.

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That's actually not too bad! You gotta figure you're going to get some preaching at a Pentecostal church no matter what the occasion - I mean, that's what they do.

 

You could've gotten 'the full Monty' - be glad you got off so lightly! ;)

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Hi thomas

I agree with Allgodsfail, you did get off lightly. I gather that non attending relatives are merely tolerated at such occasions or not invited at all....but how come no tongues? The pastor - well maybe he had a bad day and didn't have the energy to 'preach' in your general direction...(thats part of a monty python line)?

 

Take it as a compliment rather than a brush off. You and your wife may be too much of a test for all of them.

<shrug>

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Thomas and Mrs Thomas:

 

There were really nothing new in the preaching, but I did not see how it could count as a personal message to the couple, and I did not find it a valuable basis for building a strong marriage either. While the preacher talked about fasting, my wife (now a liberal Christian) could not take it anymore. When the pastor said, that fasting was about setting something good aside in order to concentrate on something even better, my wife whispered to the person beside her: “That’s why we do not go to church. We are fasting from it”.

 

But else we did have a good day and a good wedding party

 

Cool, attending the wedding and festivus, err, festivities, happening. :)

 

Almost all situations that have some form of *preacher* anymore have the bullshit preaching included..

 

Mrs. Thomas is a wise woman. Very wise.. ;)

 

kevinL

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..but how come no tongues?

 

Actually, there were a number of unchurched people there. The groom is a new convert with non Christian family and friends, and the bride (sister to my wife) has a number of people in her familiy, that have left the fundy forms of christianity they grew up with.

 

My guess is, that the church wanted to make a good impression on the guests.

 

But you are all so right, we can just be happy that they did not preach and practice their "full gospel".

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I have been to pentecostal funerals that were just like church services. They preach about jesus coming, or being ready when it is your time..... they really can lay it on thick. They almost forget about the person that is next to them in the coffin! (At least the ones I have seen)

As others have stated, whew!!! You did get off light! They usually attack like a lion on steak when they see an ex-member. Be thankful! :grin:

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That's actually not too bad! You gotta figure you're going to get some preaching at a Pentecostal church no matter what the occasion - I mean, that's what they do.

 

You could've gotten 'the full Monty' - be glad you got off so lightly! ;)

 

Yeah, that's probably true.

 

I really don't understand why fasting was discussed... :shrug: But what your wife said was funny... :HaHa:

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  • 2 weeks later...

I agree the sermon on offerings, prayer and fasting was somewhat off-topic and impersonal, but at least it wasn't the "husband is the head of the wife" sermon...

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I have been to pentecostal funerals that were just like church services. They preach about jesus coming, or being ready when it is your time..... they really can lay it on thick. They almost forget about the person that is next to them in the coffin! (At least the ones I have seen)

As others have stated, whew!!! You did get off light! They usually attack like a lion on steak when they see an ex-member. Be thankful!  :grin:

That reminded me of my BIL's funeral! Its a nontraditional charismatic church. Nontraditional in that they are preterist. I was still quite into it all back then, and by the time the preacher finished, most of us wanted to go too! :lmao:

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