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Goodbye Jesus

Lucifer Is Gay


Darklady

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I was chatting to some xtians and this is what they said:

 

[N] Lucifer was actually gay.

 

[A] that was why God kicked him out of heaven

 

[A] heaven is for straight angels only

 

[N] He was caught touching inappropriately and got a smackdown.

 

It would be funny :lmao: if they weren't serious, and they most assuredly were.

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That is hilarious. You would have thought that, not being able to reproduce, angels would have no sexuality at all and thefere would be neither straight nor gay. Indeed isn't Jesus made to say in one of the gospels that the people in heaven are "as the angels are" and do not marry?

 

But then there's the whole Nephilim thing? Contradictions anyone?

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It would be funny :lmao: if they weren't serious, and they most assuredly were.

 

Exactly. It would be funny if it wasn't so evil and dangerous. Christians like that perpetuate the violence and mistreatment of people they don't understand.

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He is gay. Don't you guys watch South Park.

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He is gay. Don't you guys watch South Park.

 

Yup. And that's all the proof we need.

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I was chatting to some xtians and this is what they said:

 

[N] Lucifer was actually gay.

 

[A] that was why God kicked him out of heaven

 

[A] heaven is for straight angels only

 

[N] He was caught touching inappropriately and got a smackdown.

 

It would be funny :lmao: if they weren't serious, and they most assuredly were.

You gotta be kidding me!? Wow.

 

So there are genders between angels? Do the procreate? Or do they have genitalia only for fun? What's up with that?

 

At least we know Satan has more sense of style than God.

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So that means angels, who are eternal creatures, eat and poop too. And why would god give them reproductive organs?

 

Brilliant deductive reasoning capacities these people have.

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I bet the angels have DNA as well, and they have evolved from cherubs and/or pixies. Maybe they share a common ancestor with gnomes?

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I bet the angels have DNA as well, and they have evolved from cherubs and/or pixies. Maybe they share a common ancestor with gnomes?

 

:lmao: I wish I had thought of some of these replies, alas I was stunned into silence.

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And I thought that was just the catholic school girl outfit he wore?!?! :HaHa:

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I call Bullshit. I've had sex w/ Satan, he is definately bi.

 

and a bit polyamorous.

 

not to mention insatiable.

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Guest I Love Dog

I was chatting to some xtians and this is what they said:

 

[N] Lucifer was actually gay.

 

[A] that was why God kicked him out of heaven

 

[A] heaven is for straight angels only

 

[N] He was caught touching inappropriately and got a smackdown.

 

It would be funny :lmao: if they weren't serious, and they most assuredly were.

 

Well, DL, Satan does have a VERY hot ass and he's also horny!

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I guess that is why Hell is so Fabulous!

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Did Satan's fall have anything to do with him wanting to be on top?

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That horny devil!

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Guest Babylonian Dream

Germanic angels aren't even angels, they're ghosts, so of course they have genitals! They were once humans. They even caught an angel on camera before he was sent away to hell:

 

We know its because Satan was gay though, because he really doesn't have anything against God, he even celebrated his birthday:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABSAiNq3YvM&feature=related

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I bet if you had had this conversation a hundred years ago, Satan would have been black. Or Jewish. Or Irish.

 

Satan is always pegged as the currently "out" (no pun intended) group among the religious.

 

Around 400 B.C., however, people realized that there were political benefits to demonizing the disenfranchised, and the idea of an embodiment of pure evil became expedient.
(Rotten.com)

 

People have been doing it ever since.

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Well then it's God's fault then. If God had provided Lucifer and his boys with some hot female angels to hang out with, they wouldn't have turned to each other for sexual gratification.

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Guest Babylonian Dream

Yeah, but guy on guy action is way too awesome, so it doesn't matter anyway. God didn't like it, so they just went downstairs to turn up the heat :wicked:

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That is hilarious. You would have thought that, not being able to reproduce, angels would have no sexuality at all and thefere would be neither straight nor gay.

 

I watched Rosemary's Baby the other night. As far as I could tell, Satan was enjoying it. So I'm guessing he swings both ways.

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