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Getting Cynical And Short Tempered Since Deconversion


Tabula Rasa
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Edit:meant to say forgive my whining but I need to get this off my chest

 

While I'm glad I deconverted, and don't believe anymore that the universe is ruled by an omnipotent psychopath, I've got some problems from it too. Basically, it's knowing that God either doesn't exist, or doesn't care if he does. I know I should grow the fuck up, but it's hard to come to terms with the fact that we live in a fairly shitty world ruled by corrupt politicians and religious leaders, and there's no help coming from above. Knowing that when I die, that most likely, all that'll happen is I'll rot and become worm food doesn't help matters any.

 

Please forgive me for being a goddamn whiny asshole, but how do you guys (Especially the atheists) come to terms with how fucked up the world we live in is?

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I think it may be a phase of life issue. We all go through points in our lives where our skin seems a little thinner and we are angry about something we just can't put our finger on.

 

For instance, being stuck in a job with no more potential for growth. Wanting to go places and see things and learn things to better yourself can be frustrating if you never seem to have enough money to do things.

 

Life is short, so what am I doing here? Why am I doing this?

 

"God will make it all better, eventually" was a non-reality based way to get through the work day week after endless week.

 

I compare it to this. What if you thought you had $14,000 in a bank account for this kick-ass vacation to a destination of your dreams? You saved and saved. Held onto bonuses without buying things and held on to the money. You had this great automatic draft thing going on that automatically transferred the money to a special vacation account for you.

 

You tap tap tap at your computer happily waiting for the summer to come along so you can take a long vacation and enjoy yourself. You put up with all sorts of bullshit at work because you know that little by little the money is accumulating for that kick-ass vacation coming up!

 

When vacation time comes along you realize, to you own horror, that you forgot to initiate the ach transfer several years back! Oh no! There IS no money for that trip! (You were never that great with personal finances. Luckily, you were never overdrawn when you paid bills and bought clothes and groceries).

 

Now, with that mistaken dream dashed to the ground, you have to start over. You can build the $$ back up like you thought you had been doing all along. Except now, you have to watch things much closer. You have to actually do the things necessary to make that account build. It's harder, in the face of that evaporated expectation of luxurious lounging on a beach somewhere, but you can do it all right. You might even save more faster by watching your budget closely and balancing your check book.

 

But . . . it so much more tiresome now. For now, there's a little less joy. You're a little less motivated about doing your work. But, after some time has gone by and you realize the money is building back up, you get some of your old enthusiasm back.

 

My point is, losing one's belief in god is like waking up to the fact that something went terribly wrong and there is no money in your savings account. Once you develop a plan, gain some more self awareness and get a little more confirmation that your new plan is taking you where you want to go, you might find yourself being more content, less irritable and happier in your life.

 

I'm still "between plans" myself. Maybe your post is a reminder to myself to take a more direct approach to making the most of the awesome privilege of sentient life.

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I never thought that god would make it all better. It is a shitty world, but it is the only one we have. I will always be shitty that people are not as other centred as I would like them to be, but it isn't going to change because I don't like it.

 

I think what you need Tabs is someone to hold you sweet :)

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Guest riverrunner

well if you think it through it actually makes perfect sense. we are the product of millions of years of evolution - we both love and hate, we are both good and bad, since everything that advances our species gets passed on (including delusions like religion).

 

and as always remember you did not exist for 14.5 billion years and you wont exist after you die. please enjoy your very brief time here.

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Two ways. One, it is a relief not to have to deal with the "problem" of evil any more. I don't have to keep asking god why I have to live through this nightmare. I could stop asking why god hates me so much, and accept that life sucks because we are not designed and we're not special. It's still somewhat intimidating, but at least now it's nothing personal.

 

The other thing is to look at how far the human race has come without god. Progress is certainly slow, but it trickles along. So there is some power inherent in the beings we've happened to become. Which means all the good stuff that happened, happened because people made it happen, not because it was a gift from god. We screw up too, but we also are able to fix things.

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Well, it may seem silly but here is how it is for me:

 

It is a privilege to be here. Time beyond imagination led to the possiblity of my life.

 

I do not have to grovel or fear a god.

 

I only have to learn to be myself. If I "work on me" it is because I perceive the need. Not because an old book told me to.

 

And when I die it will be the best sleep ever. No concern. No work to do. No torture or eternal worshiping (shoot me now!)....

 

Just quiet.

And I will enter the ground, and something will grow from that spot. Something will eat it...something else will eat that....etc.

 

What contributed to your body? Your cells? The minerals that made you? It is amazing, I think. Not lacking at all. And when we are dead, we will not CARE that we are dead. I think it is harder to loose others than it is to loose oneself.

 

Hang in there.

Look for happiness.

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"DO YOU KNOW WHY A MARINE IS ALWAYS HAPPY?"

 

"Sir, no SIR!" they shouted in unison.

 

"BECAUSE IT COULD ALWAYS BE 20 @!#%ING TIMES WORSE!!"

from Why I am always happy by Larry Spencer

http://new.exchristian.net/2011/01/why-i-am-always-happy.html

 

That is why I am always happy:)

 

Having survived a childhood that was filled with uncertainty, fear, hunger and confusion, as well as having survived a car wreck where I thought I was going to die and a marriage where I feared my ex had the capability of killing me and having survived being squeezed into the Christian box and punching enough holes in that box to worm my way out - well, I have a lot to be happy about.

 

And if things were even worse, well, someone out there is going through/has gone through even more than I have or ever will.

 

We really do live in an amazing world at an amazing time when one can grasp the knowledge of the ages. Who would have guessed even when I was a kid how the internet would allow us to read on just about any topic? Or that women would be allowed the freedom to be all they can be? Or that science would answer so many of our questions?

 

The other reason I am happy is that I have had a chance at true love in the form of my wonderful Hubby. It took me fifteen years to find him. Love is powerful and redeeming. Real love. Person to person love. Not imaginary love from someone in the sky who never farts or gets dirty or tells bad jokes.

 

This is the one life I get and it is up to me to make the most of it.

 

The world may be filled with shitty people but it also has some of the most wonderful people. It has the moon, the sunsets, the little dog with short legs and really big ears who makes me laugh everyday [okay, Penny exists in my world only but what a little bundle of joy]. I am a fortunate person compared to so many and live a better life than so many people in a better country than so many people. Basically, I choose happiness.

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Thanks for all the replies folks. I'll take them to heart and try to work on having a more positive outlook.

 

Thanks again,

Tab

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Tab:

 

When I decoonverted, i went through some rough patches, that sound a lot like yours. I have arrived at the some of the same conclusions, more or less, about deity's existing. I don't believe they're there, but if they are, then they don't care. What helped me out, was educating myself. Start reading, or watching debates on youtube, or even science videos on youtube, etc. educate yourself about the problems in your world, or that you see. eventually, you'll be awed by the wonder of things that are much bigger than this world, or the things that are very small. eventually you'll learn to come to terms with many things you're starting to accept.

 

I was an angry Atheist for a long time (pretty militant too). Now, I hope i am much more like Eric Hoffer's gentle cynic (the opposite of a religious fanatic). I just live and let live- if someone crosses my path and they ask me some questions, i talk to them. Otherwise, I am trying to be the change I want to see in the world, and on occasion I get into some nasty discussions with jehovah witnesses.... makes me feel better.

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Well, it may seem silly but here is how it is for me:

 

It is a privilege to be here. Time beyond imagination led to the possiblity of my life.

 

I do not have to grovel or fear a god.

 

I only have to learn to be myself. If I "work on me" it is because I perceive the need. Not because an old book told me to.

 

And when I die it will be the best sleep ever. No concern. No work to do. No torture or eternal worshiping (shoot me now!)....

 

Just quiet.

And I will enter the ground, and something will grow from that spot. Something will eat it...something else will eat that....etc.

 

What contributed to your body? Your cells? The minerals that made you? It is amazing, I think. Not lacking at all. And when we are dead, we will not CARE that we are dead. I think it is harder to loose others than it is to loose oneself.

 

Hang in there.

Look for happiness.

 

Brilliant.

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Edit:meant to say forgive my whining but I need to get this off my chest

 

While I'm glad I deconverted, and don't believe anymore that the universe is ruled by an omnipotent psychopath, I've got some problems from it too. Basically, it's knowing that God either doesn't exist, or doesn't care if he does. I know I should grow the fuck up, but it's hard to come to terms with the fact that we live in a fairly shitty world ruled by corrupt politicians and religious leaders, and there's no help coming from above. Knowing that when I die, that most likely, all that'll happen is I'll rot and become worm food doesn't help matters any.

 

Please forgive me for being a goddamn whiny asshole, but how do you guys (Especially the atheists) come to terms with how fucked up the world we live in is?

One time a man came walking towards me with a pig under his arm.

I said, 'Excuse me sir, where did you get that pig?'

And the pig said, 'Eh, I won him at the fair!'

 

My point is, perspective, keep life in perspective. Everyone has an idea of how our lives end and begin. Everyone goes to their graves with different points of view and beliefs. No one knows what happens when we die. From a scientific point of view, we just cease functioning, end of story. What is science does not go deep enough? What if we do not exactly stop at death? People do have energy that keeps them alive. When we die what happens to this energy? Energy cannot be destroyed but it can be changed. Is this spiritualism or too weird shit to think about? I dunno. I just see death as one more adventure since no religion has the answer. I'll find out when I get there.

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Your anger sounds totally normal to me. Losing faith is a lot like losing a friend or family member. the cycle of grief includes anger and you need to experience this feeling before you can feel better.

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Your anger sounds totally normal to me. Losing faith is a lot like losing a friend or family member. the cycle of grief includes anger and you need to experience this feeling before you can feel better.

 

THIS is it 'in a nutshell for me! Hang in there girl - we're in this together! i am going through the exact same thing! Hug and kiss on the cheek for you tonight! :kiss:

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