Brother Jeff Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 The Spook of Kryasst who is also somehow magically Him magically caused me to read this article on Facebook yesterday. Within it, the glorious fact that the Holy Spook is female is revealed. http://www.elephantjournal.com/2011/06/pentecost-the-day-the-church-came-out/ From the article linked above (which is too long to quote in this topic): The amazing thing about Pentecost is that this event reveals a nature of God which is hidden from most of those who name the name of Christ. The root word of “spirit” is breath. It is the Breath of God which, in its might, sounds like the proverbial “freight train” associated with an onslaught of vicious wind. The Hebrew people would have understood this reference because it is replete in the Hebrew Scriptures especially in regard to the references to the Spirit of God (the Breath of God) throughout the narratives. The other amazing aspect of the Pentecost event is that the Breath of God is female. This, again, would not have been anything new to the followers of Judaism. Throughout the Hebrew Scriptures, whenever the term Spirit of God or Breath of God is used, the Hebrew descriptive pronoun is female. When the Breath of God “moved over the face of the deep” in Genesis, “She moved over the face of the deep.” When the Spirit of God “came upon Sampson,” “She came upon Sampson.” And we know the glorious story of Kryasst's birth from the Word: 26 Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, 27 to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. 28 And having come in, the angel said to her, “Rejoice, highly favored one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!”[c]29 But when she saw him,[d] she was troubled at his saying, and considered what manner of greeting this was. 30 Then the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. 31 And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bring forth a Son, and shall call His name JESUS. 32 He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Highest; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David. 33 And He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of His kingdom there will be no end.” 34 Then Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I do not know a man?” 35 And the angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Highest will overshadow you; therefore, also, that Holy One who is to be born will be called the Son of God. 36 Now indeed, Elizabeth your relative has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is now the sixth month for her who was called barren. 37 For with God nothing will be impossible.” 38 Then Mary said, “Behold the maidservant of the Lord! Let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her. A more accurate translation would read: "Then Mary said to the friendly spook, "How can this Glorious Bullshit be, since I have never been fucked by a man?" And the friendly spook answered and said, "The Holy Spook will rape you with a Divine Dildo and the power of Her Sky Orgasm will penetrate you; therefore, also, that the Magical One who is to be magically conceived will be called the Son of the Holy Farter." And so it is that an act of Divine Gay Sex magically produced our Lard & Slaver, Jesus Kryasst! And, the fact that the Holy Spook is a Sky Woman also explains how Mary could be raped by Her and still somehow magically remain a Virgin! It all somehow magically makes sense now! But... the fact that the Spook of Kryasst is a Sky Woman/Spook/Bird would seem to complicate Her relationship with the Holy Farter and and the Lard Jesus, even though they are all somehow magically Each Other... Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Damn these females trying to usurp our manly authority Or is it just a kinky girl on girl thingy? The Holy Spirit will come upon you.... I always giggled when I read this and envisioned coitus interruptus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted June 13, 2011 Moderator Share Posted June 13, 2011 I have no comment - I am just sittin at my computer in hysterics and wanted you to know.................................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted June 13, 2011 Author Share Posted June 13, 2011 Damn these females trying to usurp our manly authority Or is it just a kinky girl on girl thingy? The Holy Spirit will come upon you.... I always giggled when I read this and envisioned coitus interruptus Yeah, I always thought that was funny too, and I'm sure our giggles and the giggles of many others have pissed Jesus off! That cartoon is a keeper! Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted June 13, 2011 Author Share Posted June 13, 2011 I have no comment - I am just sittin at my computer in hysterics and wanted you to know.................................... Bless the LARD, Sister Margee! Sky Hysterics are the best kind... Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tabula Rasa Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Hmm, this is quite interesting. Of course,since the Holy Spirit was female, and knew her way around a woman's body, she must have made Mary scream and moan in ecstasy all night long. It's a given that Joseph didn't get any sleep on account of A: his and Mary's bed shaking, and B all the wanking he was doing while watching the Holy Sexpot and his wife engaged in "hot two girl action." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mwc Posted June 15, 2011 Share Posted June 15, 2011 Mary was lesbian and she had a very powerful "freight train" like wind coming from between her thighs. This is the obviously why Joseph and Mary never had sex and why Joseph winds up disappearing very early in the stories. mwc 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted June 16, 2011 Author Share Posted June 16, 2011 Hmm, this is quite interesting. Of course,since the Holy Spirit was female, and knew her way around a woman's body, she must have made Mary scream and moan in ecstasy all night long. It's a given that Joseph didn't get any sleep on account of A: his and Mary's bed shaking, and B all the wanking he was doing while watching the Holy Sexpot and his wife engaged in "hot two girl action." Amen, Brother! Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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