The "mind Of A Missionary"

[Mutate]

It was hard being a missionary in this country. The dictator had forced all Christians underground in secret house groups. They had had a long debate about whether it would be OK to lie if the militia came asking where the Christians are (as Christians cannot lie). They concluded that God would definatly keep the militia from coming to make it so they didn't have to lie, and if they did come, that would be His sign that their work was over and they could go to their glorious rest (and maybe save a few souls with their martyr-dom). They would freely admit their faith and accept the gift of self sacrifice and heaven.

 

They were huddled in the backroom, praying, when Johnny came in, tears running down his face. Behind him were the soldiers, wearing their trademark combat uniform. "They came". The Christians stood up, grateful smiles on their faces. They had worked so hard, now they could finally go to their rest.

 

"Line up" barked the soldier. They lined up proudly. "now renouce your faith, one by one, and we will let you go. However, stay silent and you will die." The first three in the line continued praying, and died proudly, with excited smiles for the coming reward. But Roger was weakening. He could hear the shots in the children's room upstairs, as Johnny had not wanted them to be left behind on the amazing journey they were about to take. He started to shake and stammer,

 

" I, I, er, "

 

The pastor and his wife, next in line, looked at each other sadly. "Don't do this roger. Think of the glory!"

 

"I renounce my faith!" screamed Roger frantically, before running from the room, free in the world of man, but lost in sin.

 

The last two died praising God, telling the soldiers the good news about their salvation before they were shot. The pastors wife jumped for joy and clapped her hands excitedly as they pumped the M16 into her. The pastor raised his hands with tears of joy, looking at his wifes body jealously. Pointing to his head, he cried, "Give it to me right here! I'm ready to be with my Lord, don't make me wait any longer! He can save you too!" That brain, that once held so much knowledge on creation science and calvinst theology, now splattered on the wall, the soldiers then left, to continue cleansing.

 

But one soldier, touched by what he had seen, could not stop hearing the call. That night, he gave his life to Jesus. Then, he fled to the USA, to tell the media what he had seen.

 

When the people of the USA heard the truth, that Christianity was so real these people would die for it, conversions went up 2000%, and evangelical bible-believing Christianity was on the rise.

Homosexuality, abortion and other sins were wiped out in the name of this public sacrifice. The truth was undeniable, these people were willing to give it all, it was finally proved.

 

It culminated in a huge televised discussion, watched by the world, where a confused Obama asked James Dobson what it was all about. Obama began to postulate that maybe the believers were sincere, but that does not mean that their particular brand of strict fundamentalist faith should dominate the world. Then, halfway through his sentence, his lip started to shake, and he broke down in sobs of shame. He meekly knelt down as, in front of the whole world, Dobson led him in the sinner's prayer.