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The Damned Fish


nolabeltam
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When I was still part of the xtian crowd, I was one of many who placed the stupid fish symbol on the back of my car. I loved when someone in a parking lot would start questioning the fish (testing my spirit I guess) and I would rattle off the appropriate answers to gain the needed support from whatever arrogant butt decided it was up to him/her to question me. When I began deconverting (and thankfully bought a different car), I hated seeing them and in this part of the country they are everywhere! It's horrible but whenever a particular driver ticks me off by going exactly the speed limit or driving "perfectly" I always look for the damned fish.

 

I was out shopping yesterday and happened to wander into a cool store that sold alot of hippie and new age stuff and I saw a bunch of those damned fish decals in one of the displays. I was about to frown when I noticed they had some that said "Jeebus," or "Darwin," and many other anti-religious words. I loved it! I was about to buy a new fish celebrating my new brain power when I noticed a decal for the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It wasn't a fish either;it had spaghetti noodles with "FSM" in the center. Now how many questions do you think I'll get from that? Of course I bought it, and I know have something way better than a stupid fish on my car....lol

 

How many of you hate the stupid fish?

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I have a FSM decal on the back of my Jeep, may His Noodly Appendage touch all the motorists who see it's glorious light shining forth above my tail pipe!

 

And yes, I hate the damn fish too. I often see bumper stickers saying, "Real Men Love Jesus" and various other Christard things freak3.gif

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It's horrible but whenever a particular driver ticks me off by going exactly the speed limit or driving "perfectly" I always look for the damned fish.

 

Really? The ones with the most religious bumper stickers, in my experience, drive like idiots. They speed, weave in and out of traffic, cut people off... their driving style and their display of religiosity scream "I think I'm better than more important than you". I'd almost prefer the "perfect" drivers (as long as they're not hanging out in the left lane of the freeway, refusing to move into the center lane where the rest of the car are going their speed, disrupting the flow of traffic).

 

I once saw a place online selling magnetic feet for putting under jesus fish. They were just magnets, not adhesive, so it wouldn't even really be vandalism...

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Luckily we do not see the fish much here anymore. When I waz a woo woo I haz a fish and my brother asked me if I was a rep for Irving and Johnson fish products that used to have a very similar fish logo they have since abandoned.

 

Speaking of which, a "fish finger" is a driver in a car giving you the finger with a jeebus fish on his bumper.

 

When I was at school in the early seventies, the then woo woo logo was the "one way" symbol something like this.

 

images-3.jpeg

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Now that I think about it....I categorize the fish drivers because I find way too many of them that drive under or just at the speed limit. I agree with you though--they definitely can't drive!

 

 

I want those feet....lolol

 

All hail his noodly appendage!

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You might love this then:

 

Provide proof of evolution (even in car magnets) with these "jesus fish" feet.

 

Great as a holiday gift to an atheist or as a gag to a hardcore Christian. Also makes a fun weekend activity in any parking lot: jesus fish conversion!*

 

fishfeetlarge.jpg

 

Fits precisely under most Jesus fish and affixes quickly and securely with a magnet.

 

*The Arrogant Atheist does not assume responsibility of customer usage of this product. Unless those actions are completely lawful and super fun. In which case, you're welcome.

 

http://www.thearrogantatheist.com/accfeet.html

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How many of you hate the stupid fish?

I did for quite a while, but my irritation is wearing off. I'm kind of starting to accept that some people just need to wear their religion on their sleeve.

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Christian fish and bumper stickers are outward signs of their insecurity, and doubt in their faith.

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Luckily we do not see the fish much here anymore. When I waz a woo woo I haz a fish and my brother asked me if I was a rep for Irving and Johnson fish products that used to have a very similar fish logo they have since abandoned.

 

Speaking of which, a "fish finger" is a driver in a car giving you the finger with a jeebus fish on his bumper.

 

When I was at school in the early seventies, the then woo woo logo was the "one way" symbol something like this.

 

images-3.jpeg

 

(_|_)

images-3.jpeg

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I like the one that has the Darwin fish fucking the Jesus fish in the ass. I would never put it on my truck, though, 'cuz I really like my truck and don't want people to do mean things to it.

 

http://www.evolvefis...sh/emblems.html

 

 

I totallly want the dead fish. Yes I do.

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This is awesome and I, too, hate seeing those fish. BUT... I'll plug the FSM logo, and for more reasons than to make a statement to those who may disagree with you. About a year after I deconverted, and when I was still feeling quite lonely, I was walking into work from the parking lot and saw a car with the FSM logo. I was enthralled! Another like me! I thought I'd seen who used that car and after a meeting where I was able to confirm his name, I emailed him and asked if he's the one who drove the x-colored y-make/z-model car, asking pardon for such an odd question. He responded and I went and talked to him. It was great. We've gone out for happy hour after work now and seem to have a decent friendship going.

 

Anyway, just wanted to share a potential positive effect of making yourself visible to others who might want support!

 

 

His car also had THIS on it, which is pretty cool, too.

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... saw a car with the FSM logo. I was enthralled! Another like me!

 

 

I know how you feel. I live in Virginia, practically within spittin' distance from both the Robertson and Falwell empires. Just this week while driving down the road, for the first time ever in RL, I saw a car with the FSM logo. I was enthralled and I didn't even have the opportunity to meet the driver!

 

Every once in a while I'll see a Darwin fish, but I bet I see hundreds of those stupid xtian fishies every day. And I also think they are THE most rude drivers on the road and the businesses who display that stinking fish are THE most shady ones. (I guess that comes from the xtian sense of entitlement -- after all, they're "speshul" -- just ask 'em!) Wendyloser.gif

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Its not the normal ones that I dislike, or the ones with the cross for eyes...its the Jesus Fish that eats the Darwin Fish that I get annoyed at. :\

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My favorite Jesus Fish parody.

t-rex-and-jesus-fish.jpeg

 

Course if the Jesus Fish is what's pissing you off then you haven't had to sit in traffic and witness Truck Nuts. Jesus Fish can't compare to Truck Nuts.

 

truck-nuts.jpg

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Really? The ones with the most religious bumper stickers, in my experience, drive like idiots. They speed, weave in and out of traffic, cut people off...

 

I concur. Whenever someone cuts me off or changes lanes close to me with no signal, I will look for and often find the Jesus fish.

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Really? The ones with the most religious bumper stickers, in my experience, drive like idiots. They speed, weave in and out of traffic, cut people off...

 

I concur. Whenever someone cuts me off or changes lanes close to me with no signal, I will look for and often find the Jesus fish.

 

Same here. It is usually affixed to an expensive SUV, Mercedes, or other expensive high performance car (I work in a wealthy area). If not that, here in Florida we have the "Choose Life" bullshit license plate. Its bright yellow and you can spot it a mile away. At least we know who we are dealing with.

 

Even worse are the "Family Values" plates but, mercifully, I see few of those.

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darwin_jesus.jpg

 

Here's a button that guarantees your entry into a moronathon. I feel dumber just looking at it.

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I have a neighbor across the street that has the bumpernuts....hangs em loud and proud!

My favorite Jesus Fish parody.

t-rex-and-jesus-fish.jpeg

 

Course if the Jesus Fish is what's pissing you off then you haven't had to sit in traffic and witness Truck Nuts. Jesus Fish can't compare to Truck Nuts.

 

truck-nuts.jpg

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The other one that annoys me is the praying calvin at the foot of the cross.

 

Or the series of christian fish with the first names of the family members under them. I always wondered if they'd change that if the one kid became an atheist.

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