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Goodbye Jesus

Things Fundies Say On Facebook


Brother Jeff

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Someone may have already posted this... if so, I apologize.  This is not satire.  This is a post of a True Christian on my friends list.

 

But really... if you love Jesus, fine.  If you are all about gun rights, fine.   But combining the two together makes me angry.   Turn the other cheek?  Nah, he didn't mean that... you should shoot your enemies!   ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Guns dont kill people, Jesus kills people. :-)

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Apparently dreams are now an indication of reality.  I actually did have a friend who was planning on going to an Atlanta Braves game with some friends but the night before the game she had a dream that they all died in a crash on the way to the game.  The next morning she refused to go because she was scared that she would die.  Needless to say, all of my friends that went to the game came back just fine and had a great time.

 

Didn't she want to meet Jebus??? Most Christians do nothing but bitch and complain that this life is shit, useless, there's northing that this life has to offer etc etc, but they are still scared of dying, I guess their Faith isn't as strong as what they believe.

 

I called a Christian on being overly concerned about some worldly issue. I said the earth will be destroyed in the apocalypse and all Xians would go to heaven so don't worry about the issue. This pissed him off. :-) I guess being 'not of this world' doesnt really mean anything to Christians...**shocker** ... they seem to live just like everyone else.

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religiolitics.jpg

 

 

Ladies and gentlemen... the enemy of reason.

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Jose, that may be the biggest *facepalm* of the day. Week. Month.

 

 

 

 

 

My fundy friends have been pretty quiet about the whole "equal sign" thing. I haven't seen any of them respond to it yet.

 

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>>If most of my Facebook friends are going to support people who are gay by posting the red equal sign, I am going to post two feet, the feet represent the millions who never get to breathe the air of this world, who never feel love let alone get married, those who never have the chance to have children or go to school or do anything many gays are afforded the privilege to do. They are never given this chance because a human decides that their life is unimportant because of a defect or being an inopportune time for the person who conceived them. This is for the millions of children aborted yearly. Talk about rights being denied.

 

Sup?

 

 

The obvious solution?

 

Abort gay babies!

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attachicon.gifreligiolitics.jpg

 

 

Ladies and gentlemen... the enemy of reason.

I'm just wondering how exactly this person thinks politics intrudes on his or her religion. 

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BendyLine, Jose,

 

Please see my topic in the Lions Den about how Christian Laws are un-Christian.

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attachicon.gifreligiolitics.jpg

 

 

Ladies and gentlemen... the enemy of reason.

I'm just wondering how exactly this person thinks politics intrudes on his or her religion. 

 

That's easy. The Separation of Church and State, when properly upheld, does not allow Christians to force their religion on everyone else. If they can't dominate in every facet, then they're being "persecuted."

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I'm not sure if this person qualifies as a "fundie" given his views on gambling, but my wife told me if I didn’t post this one she would.

Today I bought 2 $5 scratch off, soon as made it home, blow out in driveway, in panic with no financial room for this, I continue to scratch of tickets won $50, got almost new tire for $51.65, covered the unfortunate blow out. PTL for the sudden urge to gamble. What a tremendous blessing. Truck runs better than before. I thought needed alignment, but new tire solved problem. Thank you Lord

 

Came at s great time. My tired new are $180 ea. Have a friend owns a tire Shoppe, used and new, this 1 came off a new car that had been wrecked. Not sure if god approved of me gambling, but I still give him the glory. LOL

 

And from the comments:

God is love!! Don't sweat the small things!!! I buy them all the time!!plus you needed it!!! Lol

 

LOL I had the same thing happen years ago.Won $100 on $2 scratch off 2 days later it cost $98 to fix my ex's jeep.Yep God works in mysterious ways.

 

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Well, my news feed is just a cavalcade of nonsense today…as usual.

 

First up we have this inspirational little picture.

 

HUzst8g.jpg

 

What our friend doesn’t know is that the boy depicted here was a Mormon who, at ten, was likely past the “age of accountability” and therefore probably doomed to hell by the reckoning of this person’s doctrine, which doubtless considers denying the full deity of Christ to be damnable heresy. Surprise, little Matthew! Your crippled ass is going straight to hell.

 

 

Next up we see the characteristic asinine juxtaposed comments from a forced-birther who happens to also be a gun rights advocate.

 

4fp3Abh.jpg

 

Remember kids, guns don't kill people; liberals kill people.

 

 

And just when you thought the double-speak couldn’t get any worse we get this loving bit of clarification:

6F9eTaF.jpg

 

 

My Facebook friends, ladies and gentlemen.

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"I'm not judging you"

 

I loooooove you...

 

*sigh*

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Well, my news feed is just a cavalcade of nonsense today…as usual.

 

First up we have this inspirational little picture.

 

HUzst8g.jpg

 

What our friend doesn’t know is that the boy depicted here was a Mormon who, at ten, was likely past the “age of accountability” and therefore probably doomed to hell by the reckoning of this person’s doctrine, which doubtless considers denying the full deity of Christ to be damnable heresy. Surprise, little Matthew! Your crippled ass is going straight to hell.

 

 

Next up we see the characteristic asinine juxtaposed comments from a forced-birther who happens to also be a gun rights advocate.

 

4fp3Abh.jpg

 

Remember kids, guns don't kill people; liberals kill people.

 

 

And just when you thought the double-speak couldn’t get any worse we get this loving bit of clarification:

6F9eTaF.jpg

 

 

My Facebook friends, ladies and gentlemen.

 

It is interesting the assumption that had the babies not been aborted that they would grow up to be taxpayers.  Perhaps they would grow up to be thugs and end up in prison? Maybe they would be on welfare?

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Well, my news feed is just a cavalcade of nonsense today…as usual.

 

First up we have this inspirational little picture.

 

HUzst8g.jpg

 

What our friend doesn’t know is that the boy depicted here was a Mormon who, at ten, was likely past the “age of accountability” and therefore probably doomed to hell by the reckoning of this person’s doctrine, which doubtless considers denying the full deity of Christ to be damnable heresy. Surprise, little Matthew! Your crippled ass is going straight to hell.

 

 

Next up we see the characteristic asinine juxtaposed comments from a forced-birther who happens to also be a gun rights advocate.

 

4fp3Abh.jpg

 

Remember kids, guns don't kill people; liberals kill people.

 

 

And just when you thought the double-speak couldn’t get any worse we get this loving bit of clarification:

6F9eTaF.jpg

 

 

My Facebook friends, ladies and gentlemen.

 

New meme poster possibility:

 

1. Calling you a bigot.

2. You taking your anti-gay marriage agenda to the US Supreme Court to make sure gays can never get married.

 

Both of these things are offensive. But which has a much greater magnitude of offense?

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I'm not sure if this person qualifies as a "fundie" given his views on gambling, but my wife told me if I didn’t post this one she would.

Today I bought 2 $5 scratch off, soon as made it home, blow out in driveway, in panic with no financial room for this, I continue to scratch of tickets won $50, got almost new tire for $51.65, covered the unfortunate blow out. PTL for the sudden urge to gamble. What a tremendous blessing. Truck runs better than before. I thought needed alignment, but new tire solved problem. Thank you Lord

 

Came at s great time. My tired new are $180 ea. Have a friend owns a tire Shoppe, used and new, this 1 came off a new car that had been wrecked. Not sure if god approved of me gambling, but I still give him the glory. LOL

 

And from the comments:

>

God is love!! Don't sweat the small things!!! I buy them all the time!!plus you needed it!!! Lol

 

LOL I had the same thing happen years ago.Won $100 on $2 scratch off 2 days later it cost $98 to fix my ex's jeep.Yep God works in mysterious ways.

 

 

Is it wrong that the thing that pisses me off most is not the stupid sentiment of the poster, but the fact that I've just learned that Yanks spell "tyre" with an i.

 

What's wrong with you people??

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Next up we see the characteristic asinine juxtaposed comments from a forced-birther who happens to also be a gun rights advocate.

 

4fp3Abh.jpg

 

Remember kids, guns don't kill people; liberals kill people.

 

I love this absurd false dichotomy.

 

If they were really pro life they would be

 

against abortion AND against guns

 

Idiots.

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Is it wrong that the thing that pisses me off most is not the stupid sentiment of the poster, but the fact that I've just learned that Yanks spell "tyre" with an i.

What's wrong with you people??

 

Don't you mean you just learnt it, Limey? I love how the board spell-checker underlines that word in squiggly red to let you know it's wrong. smile.png

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What can you expect from people who are always being knocked up in the morning?

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A pastor I'm friends with post some long boring bs against same sex marriage, and I thought perhaps a little balance was in order, so I said, basically, I don't care what The Bible says. He sent me this message that ended thusly:

Just some things to think about...Remember that God exists, that He loves you, that sin is infinitely worse than we ever thought that it was, but that on the cross the Man who bled was fully divine.

In Jesus' Truth

 

Ugh. For some reason the message opened at the end and I just haven't gotten the stomache to read the rest yet. I'm sure it is a great argument that will make me change my mind...

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Is it wrong that the thing that pisses me off most is not the stupid sentiment of the poster, but the fact that I've just learned that Yanks spell "tyre" with an i.

What's wrong with you people??

 

Don't you mean you just learnt it, Limey? I love how the board spell-checker underlines that word in squiggly red to let you know it's wrong. smile.png

 

You know what, I don't actually know.

 

Do pray tell what's the difference between learned and learnt?

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That is when I unfriend. If you really want to piss off xians, judge them back, then they tell you to quit rebuking everything.

"I'm not judging you"

 

I loooooove you...

 

*sigh*

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The real annoying thing with Christians on facebook is they post things daily ad nauseum; I unfriended a few of them, but I still have 2 who post a few things daily. The other thing I noticed is when some people are having issues or drama in their life they will post Christian messages like they are performing some type of ritual: "If I post this, God will bless me"

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Is it wrong that the thing that pisses me off most is not the stupid sentiment of the poster, but the fact that I've just learned that Yanks spell "tyre" with an i.

What's wrong with you people??

 

Don't you mean you just learnt it, Limey? I love how the board spell-checker underlines that word in squiggly red to let you know it's wrong. smile.png

 

You know what, I don't actually know.

 

Do pray tell what's the difference between learned and learnt?

 

On this side of the pond "learnt" is generally not considered a word. My understanding was that on your side of the pond it's the past participle of "learn" about 1/3rd of the time and is more likely to show up in writing rather than in speech.

 

In truth, I think it makes sense for "learnt" to be used as the past participle of "learn" if "learned" is likely to be employed as an adjective (meaning one who has acquired much learning) in order to avoid confusion. I suspect that's why "learnt" shows up more in writing than in speech since the past participle version of "learned" and the adjective "learned" are heteronyms.

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Guest r3alchild

 

 

 

 

 

Today on FB:

 

"Our culture has accepted two huge lies.

The first is that if you disagree with

someone's lifestyle, you must fear or

hate them. The second is that to love

someone means you agree with everything

they believe or do. Both are nonsense.

 

You don't have to compromise convictions

to be compassionate."

 

- Rick Warren

And that's why it's okay to be a bigot!

I saw that, and am thisclose to deleting the person who posted it. Self-righteous bullshit at its best!

Yeah, I got it too, but it was from my dad. I could delete him (have before) but don't want to deal with the drama over it.

 

The only time I deleted someone over religious stuff was this girl I knew from highschool. She was always the goody--two-shoes religious type, the kind that even got on the nerves of other fundies. She was nice enough though, but eventually she married a preacher, which made things so much worse. Every time she posted something it was about her Bible or prayer time. The last straw was when she posted something like "I love getting up at 6:00 in the morning to spend time with my daddy Jesus!" There's only so much thinly-vieled boasting I can take. Being an ass-kisser is bad enough when the person whose ass you are kissing actually exists.

That must have been hard to deal with, I have to deal with that vieled boasting and its fucked up ten ways till sunday. Makes me feel sick thinking about it.
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In getting closer to God ... good intentions or just knowing that you need to won't be enough to get it done. Rather, it must be a conscious daily effort. We must seek God with a relentless passion.

 

He’s wants so much for you to have a personal relationship with him and for you to be closer to him, but he’s also the completely silent, invisible, undisputed reigning hide and seek champion of the universe. So yeah, seek with a relentless passion indeed.

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