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I'm A Mess


Rockalocka
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A 15 year old Sophomore. He loves theater, movies, music and video games. He loves to read and talk endlessly with his friends and the people he loves. But there's a screw that's gone missing. It keeps him from functioning properly sometimes.

 

And he's still trying to find it.

 

I'm him. I don't know what happened to me this summer, but my life took a turn into the wild unknown. I became panicked and anxious all the time and I'm still trying to fix that by going to doctors and therapists. I began to doubt a religion and a god that my entire family loves and follows. I experienced freedom and amazing experiences. I learned how to have fun. But the the other things I listed got in the way. I didn't want to exercise because I was afraid I would have a heart attack or a brain aneurysm. I was scared to talk to my parents from fear of judgement. I was scared to wake up thinking, this might be the beginning of the end-times.

 

I have yet to tell my parents about my change of heart. The Bible is messed up. But even if I tried to tell them, they would pity and shun me. I've made endless mistakes. But damn, I've learned a lot. I know you guys have dealt with my bitching all summer, but thanks for helping me. I look forward to further guidance.

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If the anxiety takes hold of you so badly you cannot function well or it hurts you too much, then ask for and seek the services of a mental health professional. Life is too precious to spend in pain and mental anguish.

 

That being said, 15 years old ( and most of the teenage years) is a time of anxiety and stress for many people. I in no way want to minimize your particular manifestation of pain and turmoil. I only want to present you with a wider context in which to understand your personal struggle.

 

Hang in there. Seek knowledge - of yourself and the world around you. And learn healthy ways to find peace. You will be okay if you do.

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