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Introduction


Roxie
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Just dropping in to introduce myself. Found this amazing site a while back and have decided to join. So much great information here. I had no idea there were so many like me.

 

I was raised from birth until 14 in the Church of Christ. I didn't even know other christian churches were different. And yes, I hated going, but I had no choice. I went to their church camp one summer, where they baptized me in the swimming pool. I did not want to be baptized, the way I was taught, once you were baptized, you were no longer excused for any behavior that you might have been able to get away with as an unbaptized person. But one of the women talked me into it. I overheard her later talking to the preacher there, that they had "met their quota" with me being baptized. Did any of you know they had a quota to fill??? Longest 2 weeks of my life!

 

And, in our home we had family devotional every single night, even if we had just come home from church. (By the way, my father did NOT attend church or join in family devotional. I envied him!) I'll have to share with you the story of the world coming to an end, one night while we were having family devotional. It was HORRIBLE and HILARIOUS!

 

When I was 14, we started attending a baptist church. Wow, what a difference between the two. But still the same crap, just dressed up differently. I was in the youth choir, because they practiced on Wednesday night and it was a way for me to get out of Wed. night bible study. I eventually joined the adult choir, because they practiced while Sunday school was in session and I hated Sunday school. I was also re-baptized. Maybe they thought the first one wasn't enough.

 

When I was 18, I moved out on my own and stopped attending any church, with much relief.

 

Fast forward another 18 years, I was married and had a four year old and we had just moved to a small town in north Georgia. There was a Christian Church (not to be confused with the Church of Christ) that had a preschool. My son is an only child and our real estate agent, who attended the church, suggested that we send our son to this church preschool due to the fact that a) it was in her church, and B) there were only 13 children in the entire preschool, and c) more importantly, the money I had to pay for the preschool, went directly to the church, which I didn't really think about at the time.

 

Me, having temporarily gone insane, agreed and we sent our child there. Now this town was extremely small, the high school graduating class consisted of only 36 students, that year. And most of the town went to that same church. So, I, in my insanity, decided that it might be a good idea to attend this little church, to sort of get to know the people of the town and, more importantly, the parents of the children with whom my son would be spending a large portion of his life, until he graduated. (I was already a non-believer at the time, but sometimes we do things for what we perceive to be for the greater good of our children. Even suffering through church. Oh how I've come to regret that.)

 

You know how it is when a new victim, I mean, visitor walks into a new church. Everybody is sooooo nice. Everyone welcomes you. It sort of averts your attention to what's really going on. So while my attention was averted, and my insanity was in full swing, I filled out one of those Visitor Cards.

 

Now, I am a fairly intelligent person. I know to pull on my socks before I put on my shoes, and that sort of thing. So why, oh why, I filled out that card, is a complete mystery.

 

The very next evening, 2 men came knocking on my door, holding a potted plant. They were the "welcoming committee" for the church. Oh, how "happy" they were that we were attending their church, if we need anything, please call, blah, blah, blah.

 

It was interesting how in a church of 60 members, 95% of them married and over 75 years old, that the sermon, every single week, was about the evils of homosexuality. Who was the preacher preaching to???

 

We continued to attend this church, and Every. Damn. Monday. Night. someone from the church came to our house.

 

I couldn't figure it out. It didn't matter if we were sick, or had other plans or just didn't want company on a Monday night, there they were. So, then, finally, my brain cells healed or reconnected or something and I started to question this chronic intrusion of my life.

 

We actually moved to another house about 2 years later while attending this church. I purposely did NOT fill out a change of address with the church, but they found me anyway. Never. Missed. A. Single. Monday. Night.

 

When, finally, finally one Monday night, one of the men asked when we were planning on joining the church. (Oh! That's what this is about, and here I thought you were just being nice, as intrusive as that is.)

 

Here's the thing, we had been attending twice on Sundays and every Wednesday, and when my son was in their preschool, I was constantly volunteering for his class.

 

I was in church more than the preacher!!

 

So, I told the man who was wanting to know when we were going to join, that we were at church, every time the doors opened, how much more "joined" could we be?

 

He said something about becoming a member, and I told him we "were" members. (At least that's what I thought.)

 

Then he said that we, my husband and I, had to stand up and make a public announcement, at church, that we were "joining" the church and "come forward" on Sunday morning.

 

I had never heard of this.

 

And then I asked him the questions that finally sent him away:

 

Me: "Why do we have to "join" the church, why can't we just "go" to church?" (I honestly did not know you had to "join" a church to go there.)

 

Him: "Well, we want you to be a part of our family. Besides, we need a new Deacon because the old one moved, along with his wife, so we need a new Sunday School teacher, too."

 

Me: "Can't we just go to church without making a public announcement?"

 

Him: "No, you need to join, publicly."

 

(Now, I'm a pretty easy going person, but who the hell was the idiot telling me that I couldn't just go to church, that I needed to join, publicly? What were they going to do? They certainly couldn't revoke my membership, before I became a member. Hey, wait! Maybe that IS why you have to become a member: so they can make you toe the line or revoke your membership!)

 

Me: "I don't understand, will joining your church, publicly, get us a free ticket into heaven?" (Yes, I actually said that, even to my own surprise.)

 

Him: "No."

 

Then he turned around and left!

 

It wasn't until he left that I picked up on the need for a deacon and teacher. Apparently that's all they were after, and maybe there was something in their by-laws or whatever they had, that prohibited them from using the services of a "non-member". Needless to say, we didn't go back, to that church or any other.

 

Now, another 18 years later, we once again moved to an even smaller town that has only one church, located two doors down from our house. Of course, we are the talk of the town. Fresh meat.

 

The first Sunday, after moving in, the preacher walked over to our house to invite us to his church. There are 8 members. Eight! He said he would love for us to come to church "to give the other members someone new to look at!" (Yeah, more likely to gossip about. Or maybe the Sunday School teacher and Deacon, if there are any, want to retire and here we are. New victims.)

 

Nope, haven't gone. Don't plan on going. I'm sure we are probably known as "those devil-worshipers." Granted, my son drives a hearse with a real coffin in the back, that is parked in the front of the house, so that might add to the diabolical reputation we have. Can't wait to start decorating for Halloween. But, I think they actually tolerate us because we never "said" we weren't believers.

 

This is not the only reason why I became an ex-christian. I was a "non-believer" or, maybe more particularly a "doubter" from the time I was forced to go to the Church of Christ. The rest of my story is so similar to the other posters here, it would be redundant for me to post it.

 

All I can say about Christianity is, now, I'm over it, done with it and refuse to go back. I tried to believe, I really did, but was sadly and continuously disappointed. I am no longer bitter. In fact, I have come to the point that I can laugh at myself for being so deluded, and am no longer afraid of a lightning bolt zapping me out of existence.

 

Roxie

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Roxie! Wecome to EX-c! Good to have you with us. I giggled as I read your story (sorry) It's just that I related to it so much! I was like you - I spent so much time at the church, I should have owned my own bedroom there!

 

I remember joining a church and filling out a lot of paperwork - pages of questions. I've always been a little 'dark', even when I considered myself a good christian.

There was this one question they asked. ''Have you engaged in any homosexual activity in the last year?'' :twitch: I looked over at my fiancé' and asked him if 'fantasies' counted? :scratch: I often wonder what they would have done if I had of checked off, 'yes'.:lmao: Stupid churches!

 

I am so glad you are here - looking forward to more of your posts!

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Thanks, glad to be here. I have enjoyed reading your posts, too.

 

I wonder if I had opted to "join" what kind of paperwork they would have given me. I had no idea they would ask questions like that. Maybe they're just perverted. Or use it for blackmail!

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Welcome to Ex-c,I got quite a laugh out of the hearse part.May I suggest external speakers on the sound system and Queen's greatest hits.

 

Cause nothing turns heads like a hearse cruisin' down the road to "Another One Bites the Dust". This gag got more than one christard complaining about me and my partner in my Ambulance days. WE would turn the siren to "PA" setting and go right down main street letting it rip. :lmao:

 

Anyway glad to have you,looking forward to your posts.

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Loved the play by play dialogue of your conversation with the church folks. The words "I tried to believe, I really did" ring so true. For a time I really did believe, but it's only because I deluded myself into it. Finally I came to my senses and realized the truth that was right in front of me the whole time. Welcome aboard!

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Welcome to ExC, Roxie. I enjoyed reading your post. Well done!

 

I especially liked this:

 

Me: "I don't understand, will joining your church, publicly, get us a free ticket into heaven?" (Yes, I actually said that, even to my own surprise.)

 

Him: "No."

 

Then he turned around and left!

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