Suzy Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 From this website: http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteArchives.aspx?Archive=1 First, masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he’s watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body. Good. That means about 90% of the sexually active adult population is homosexual, beacuse I bet most people masturbate from time to time - even Christians. The comments are great: "Porn again Christians"? "So by this definition, if a woman masturbates, it's not a homosexual act because it involves a woman? " "So every man is gay? " "COOL! ALL men are gay! Life is getting better! " "So...If(when) I fantasise about screwing a nun, it's not gay because it involves a woman? Does that make it a chriastian love act? " "Talking from personal experience here Mark? " "I used to babysit a little kid named Mark Driscoll, I sure hope you're not the same one. He was a cute, smart kid from a nice family, I'd sure hate to think he fucked up his chances in life by going fundy. " "I find the amount of time spent by fundies on considering the minutiae of other people's sexual behaviour extremely disturbing." "I'll never understand why Christians want to fight such a useless and losing battle trying to keep people from masturbating in particular and enjoying sex in general. And I wonder if Mark has any secrets he's hiding re: watching himself in a mirror and getting turned on by himself. He couldn't be any more a projectionist if he worked in a movie theater. " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted September 18, 2011 Super Moderator Share Posted September 18, 2011 Uh oh. I'm getting the urge to sing some show tunes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzy Posted September 18, 2011 Author Share Posted September 18, 2011 Another one: Quote# 62318 No, God's Penis is not a biological organ. I never said God's Penis was the same as man's penis. Obviously it wouldn't be. That is why I pointed out God has a Holy, Righteous Penis. That is to say, it's not the same as man's corrupted, fleshy one. As I said when this subject first came up, once again: Penises are not just for sex & peeing. It is only because man is evil that he thinks of penises exclusively in those terms. Man is made in the image of God the Father. That is the primary reason why man has a penis. You cannot insert your evil prejudicial ideas of man's penis onto God - which is exactly what you are doing. God's Penis is not equal to man's penis. It's really not hard to understand. http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=62318 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrotherJosh Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 Fear. That's all it comes down to (well maybe stupidity...). People who write this kind of stuff and/or believe it are afraid. They're afraid of the demonized by the pulpit homosexuals (undoubtedly they know at least one gay person). They're afraid of their own inner feelings (see Ron White's, ). It's no small wonder then that usually the largest anti-gay advocates are hypocrites like...Larry Craig...Ted Haggard...Paul Crouch ...Mark Foley...Bob Allen... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 If this were true, the biggest wankers would attract the most chicks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chikirin Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 Fear. That's all it comes down to (well maybe stupidity...). People who write this kind of stuff and/or believe it are afraid. They're afraid of the demonized by the pulpit homosexuals (undoubtedly they know at least one gay person). They're afraid of their own inner feelings (see Ron White's, ). It's no small wonder then that usually the largest anti-gay advocates are hypocrites like...Larry Craig...Ted Haggard...Paul Crouch ...Mark Foley...Bob Allen... I believe the reason Christians are against gay marriage is because of the fear that God will send brimstone like he did on Sodom and Gomorrah. I don't see concern for homosexuals, but concern for their own property. I think that's quite selfish. When I voted for Bush, it was because of fear of what God would do to me if I didn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 And biting your fingernails is a form of cannibalism. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eugene39 Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 Quote# 62318God has a Holy, Righteous Penis. Just how in the hell do they know that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cracked Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 With this kind of logic, the virgin Mary couldn't possibly of been a virgin if she "touched" herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So if you go down on God, it's not gay? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hereticzero Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The Christian concept, and other religions too, is to pervert human nature into something vile and disgusting. Everywhere the church goes preaching its perverted doctrines, disaster follows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So if you go down on God, it's not gay? If Jesus willingly gave himself up for torture, does that not make him a submissive? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Uh oh. I'm getting the urge to sing some show tunes. Another one: Quote# 62318 No, God's Penis is not a biological organ. I never said God's Penis was the same as man's penis. Obviously it wouldn't be. That is why I pointed out God has a Holy, Righteous Penis. That is to say, it's not the same as man's corrupted, fleshy one. As I said when this subject first came up, once again: Penises are not just for sex & peeing. It is only because man is evil that he thinks of penises exclusively in those terms. Man is made in the image of God the Father. That is the primary reason why man has a penis. You cannot insert your evil prejudicial ideas of man's penis onto God - which is exactly what you are doing. God's Penis is not equal to man's penis. It's really not hard to understand. http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=62318 Aw, sheesh! And here I was getting all hot and lusty over Florduh until I found out about his corrupted, fleshy penis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roxie Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 It makes me wonder, how this idea even got into this person's head? Guilt, maybe? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted September 19, 2011 Super Moderator Share Posted September 19, 2011 Aw, sheesh! And here I was getting all hot and lusty over Florduh until I found out about his corrupted, fleshy penis. Honestly, it's not all that fleshy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Speaking of God Dong, Some kabbalists believe the Trinity is expressed as a pregnant hermaphrodite. God has a penis, a womb, and self impregnates. Weird concept, but it makes more sense than the father, son, and holy ghost concept. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentLoner Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 particularly if he’s watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body. People do that? lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chosendarkness Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 dum dum dum dum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andyjj Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The creator of the universe has a penis? What does he do with it? Isn't that taking biblical literalism a bit too far? Even for a fundy? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I Broke Free Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Now that I know every man who masturbates is gay I am going to go through all the member photos and pick the ones I want to send an inviting instant message to. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted September 19, 2011 Moderator Share Posted September 19, 2011 With this kind of logic, the virgin Mary couldn't possibly of been a virgin if she "touched" herself. Does this mean that we woman are gay too??? I touched myself once................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlphaToOmega Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So is like wiping your ass gay? Or only if you enjoy it? What if you just enjoy the fact that your ass is clean? Does more than two wipes constitute pleasure? One could spend a religious eternity pondering the philosophical implications of toilet tissue... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The creator of the universe has a penis? What does he do with it? Isn't that taking biblical literalism a bit too far? Even for a fundy? Panspermia is Jesus masturbating on the universe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlphaToOmega Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The creator of the universe has a penis? What does he do with it? Isn't that taking biblical literalism a bit too far? Even for a fundy? Panspermia is Jesus masturbating on the universe. Cum again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mwc Posted September 20, 2011 Share Posted September 20, 2011 If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. Wouldn't this count as a three-way? "It's finally happening hunny. I'm making your fantasy of having two guys at once come true!" Her response --> mwc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts