MultifariousBirdLady Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 I too get more angry at the self-loathing, guilt, and fear of modern evangelical christianity, rather than the "fairy tale" aspect. I have a great respect for myth, and think it can do great things for humanity, inside and outside of christianity. But the whole "you're a complete pile of shit without Jesus, and if you don't feel the Holy Spirit within you, you're damned to hell and no good to anyone - oh yeah, and if you're a female, you're twice as filthy" sometimes still makes me so angry I want to punch things. Like Eugene, I was taught thinking about sin was just as bad as the act itself. I attempted suicide because of that shit. That is not love, it's not true religion, and has nothing to do with deity or spirit. It's just hatefulness and spite. I have felt very similar, though a lot of the anger I felt for many years after first leaving has mellowed. I still have a lot of self-loathing, though, and it can get triggered very easily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badpuppy Posted December 18, 2011 Share Posted December 18, 2011 I don't feel like I was lied to. The people who told me and raised me Christian genuinely and truly believed (and still do) that they were teaching me the truth. They were (and are) victims of the Christ Cult the same as I was. The difference is, I found freedom and they haven't. I'm grateful to have found that freedom and don't really harbor any ill will toward those still enslaved. After all... THEY weren't my captors. It was the religious cult itself. That was the biggest thing that helped me release the anger (and that helps me step away from it when it rears its ugly head again on occasion). There just is NO ONE for me to blame. We can be angry that someone can't see through something, but I wouldn't be angry at a 3 year old for telling me Santa is real. I see literalist Christians as children in adult bodies when it comes to this issue. I can't be angry with a child for believing something harmful. I can only hope they grow up someday. There ARE people in literalistic Christianity that know it's bullshit and continue to propagate it. I save my anger for those people because those are the victimizers, not the majority of people caught up in the lie as well. All I can feel for most Christians is pity, which may seem condescending but it's my honest feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badpuppy Posted December 18, 2011 Share Posted December 18, 2011 Fear of hell is not a major theme for every Christian. More of a fear for fundamentalists (I'd count most Baptists as that now days) and conservative Christians in some protestant denoms. Other Christians cling to their faith because they are afraid of life without a benevolent all-powerful figure watching over them and that's often implied, is in control of their destiny. I have less issue with those types, but still, the thinking can often enable the former belief. There's a third kind of theism, "God as metaphor/symbol" and well, it gets so little time I won't even bother to give it much thought, although its quite real as well, just most Christians never get that intellectually and spiritually mature to realize it. While I agree that fear of hell is not a major theme for every Christian, with the exception of Christian Universalists who don't believe in hell, it's part of the doctrine. i.e. They "cannot" leave the faith without going to hell. So while they might like to sweep it under the rug, it is part of the theology of the vast majority of Christians. It might not be an active fear but to me that seems more the effects of stockholm syndrome than anything else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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