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My Story


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Ok so this is my first time posting on here, So my story basically starts when I was still in elementary school my mom made me and brother go to Catholic School every Wednesday and the service on Sunday. Trust me this definitely was not my favorites thing to do but I had no other choice. Me and my brother eventually got our Holy Communion and my mom surprised us with a question "Do you guys still want to go to church?" Me and my brother both did not want too so we told her no and we stopped going just like that. Later on when I was a little older I found out that my mom only forced us to go because she wanted us to get our Holy Communion so if we wanted we could get married in a Catholic church and after we got that she would let us decide for ourselves if we wanted to continue going to Church. I definitely respected that a lot and loved my mom for doing that. So religion was out of my life until senior year that's when the story really starts to begin.

 

It's the beginning of Senior year i'm excited because it's SENIOR YEAR!!!!! I had senioritus and all that good stuff. I took Newspaper for the first time and was assigned as a photographer because honestly I wasn't the best at writing articles but I was perfectly happy with being the photographer. After a while I met this girl Nicole in my class and it was instant connection between us I was flirting with her everyday and after a while all I wanted to do was see her and spend time with her. So I looked on her Facebook and saw that she was a Christian a very devoted Christian. Shortly after that she invited me to Youth Group at her Church of course I accepted seeing this as an amazing opportunity to spend time with the girl of my dreams and I really didn't know what a Youth Group was so I was interested in that as well. So the next day I went and ended up dominating this eating contest and won 10 dollars and was extremely happy everyone there seemed pretty chill and me and Nicole were connecting a lot, After the games we then all sat down for a message I quickly realized that they were trying to get all the new people saved at the end they would ask us to put our heads down and close our eyes and raise our hand if we wanted to get saved and then repeat a prayer asking Jesus into our hearts, I did not raise my hand mainly because I wanted to learn more about it before I made a commitment like that.

 

About 3 weeks after I went to my first Youth Group I went on my first date with Nicole and it went amazing we went to the beach and watched the sunset and everything was going perfect, she then asked me a question that I did not expect her to ask me she asked me if I was saved thinking if I tell her no she might not want to see me again so I quickly responded with yes and told her I got saved at the second Youth Group that I went too, we went on with our date and it was still amazing after I dropped her off I started thinking about the lie I told her and was regretting it and not regretting it at the same time, I didn't want to start our relationship with a lie but I really had no other choice otherwise there would be no relationship.

 

So 3 dates later we made our relationship official and it was great we made each other so happy and everyone at High School thought we made the cutest couple. I would attend Church with her every Wednesday and Sunday, unfortunately living with the lie I told her and faking everything at Church. Trust me the guilt was building up like crazy I was falling for her so hard and couldn't live with the lie so about one month into our relationship I told her I didn't believe and I could tell it crushed her a little bit but to my surprise she told me she's fallen for me to much and would stick with me. I told her that I would still attend Church with her and listen to the message with an open mind every time, I think that made her feel a lot better about the whole situation.

 

So after 2 months of a fight free loving relationship, I say about a week after our 3 month we had our first fight and it was over the stupidest thing she got mad at me because I didn't want to Skype after work because I was to tired and I just went to sleep she didn't talk to me the whole next day but she then apologized to me and all was well. Well I did something that probably ruined our whole relationship I was listening to this Album from a band called Jeremy Camp Nicole gave it to me and after listening to it I genuinely thought that I believed it and thought I had saw the light and at the next service I secretly asked Jesus in my heart and thought I was saved I told Nicole the next day and she was ecstatic and I was too it made us a lot happier definitely and this time I was actually into the service I talked to her about it I was doing devotions on my own. Well i'll tell you now this only lasted 2 weeks I started having doubts about it all again and just said to myself "What the fuck am I doing is this how I wanna live my life on my knees worshiping a ghost?" So I told Nicole I was having doubts and didn't really believe anymore and she was crushed again I hated to do that to her but I wan't going to live with that lie again I thought everything would go back to normal but it didn't we started having stupid little fights and I say about a week and a half later I guess after talking to the pastor and some close friends they convince her to brake up with me because God would not want you to be with someone that is not saved so she did just that and it was over. After the brake-up she ignored me right away she didn't even want to remain friends with me. I of coursed stopped going to Church and was actually pretty happy about that I missed sleeping in on Sundays. lol

 

I was heartbroken though it took me forever to get over it and honestly i'm still not, there's not a day I go without thinking about her, I loved her it wasn't High School love I actually loved her but i'm sure she convinced herself that I was just a test by God and it wasn't real love but I don't have any regrets if she came back to me today asking to get back with me I would tell her no I know better now. If it wasn't for her though I would have never learned about the bible and it's lies and exploring atheism is amazing I learn more and more everyday so that's a bonus she was also my first GF and she was great, our first 3 months I will never forget the laughs and great times that we had.

 

It's now 7 months later she's off in College and i'll be going to college very soon. According to Facebook she's in a new relationship with a guy that went to Church with us and was one of her "friends" that convinced her to brake up with me. But it's whatever if she's happy that's all that matters to me. I now consider myself a proud Atheist and love it! Thanks to anyone who read all of this and I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

P.S. Sorry if there's any errors in spelling or grammar i only proof read this once.

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It's now 7 months later she's off in College and i'll be going to college very soon. According to Facebook she's in a new relationship with a guy that went to Church with us and was one of her "friends" that convinced her to brake up with me. But it's whatever if she's happy that's all that matters to me. I now consider myself a proud Atheist and love it! Thanks to anyone who read all of this and I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

Welcome! Sorry to hear about your troubles. If it's any consolation high school friends fade away but college friends tend to last. Good luck!

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Thanks for sharing your story. If you think being a senior in high school was great, you're going to LOVE college! If it's any consolation, free-thinking girls are way more fun! You don't have to deal with religious guilt and the idea that sex is bad! Something to look forward to!

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It's now 7 months later she's off in College and i'll be going to college very soon. According to Facebook she's in a new relationship with a guy that went to Church with us and was one of her "friends" that convinced her to brake up with me. But it's whatever if she's happy that's all that matters to me. I now consider myself a proud Atheist and love it! Thanks to anyone who read all of this and I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

 

Welcome! Sorry to hear about your troubles. If it's any consolation high school friends fade away but college friends tend to last. Good luck!

Yeah that's very true. Thanks!

Thanks for sharing your story. If you think being a senior in high school was great, you're going to LOVE college! If it's any consolation, free-thinking girls are way more fun! You don't have to deal with religious guilt and the idea that sex is bad! Something to look forward to!

 

Definitely looking forward to College and free thinking girls would be a huge plus!

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oh... yeah... I remember doing all of that shit to guys :/ It's really quite embarrassing, looking back *cringe*

It would be great to ring them up and say, "hey dude, sorry I messed you around, fucked with your heart, and got rid of you when you didn't convert". And for the guys that DID convert, well, the end bit would go like, "you know how you ended up believing all that stuff? yeah well, it's a load of bullshit, sorry I got you involved in all that, I hope you don't believe any of that shit anymore!"

 

Ugh.

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Ackbar, Welcome to EX-c!! Thank you for sharing your story. Stay around for awhile and hang with us. We'll try to guide you through the 'left over baggage' of christianity AND help you through your heartbreak!!

 

You hang in there - and take it from an ole' (maybe a little wise) lady............Find a partner in life, that you have lots in common!!

Please just trust me!!! Wink, wink!! happydance.gif

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