No Offense Intended To Americans

[blackpudd1n]

LOL Onyx, LOVE the joke And I'm hearing you- it's time I, too, broke free!

[HappyChef]

And once again I'm laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair,I picture puddin sittin in front of her computer cussin a streak that would burn the hair off a cat.... I found this thread later in my surfing. It is strange how a few hundred years can change "english" so as to torment the speakers. 'n ya'll think we're funny with our southern english, heh

[Dagan]

Add your custom spellings to the spellcheck dictionary.

 

Pretty much every spellcheck program ever allows you to do this.

 

FWIW I am Canadian. Think spellchecking aussie is hard? Try figuring what the fuck just happened when your computer starts inserting French Canadian punctuation into everything.

[Vigile]

 

I didn't know the American slang either. I had an idea about ba-donk-a-donk, but couldn't decide between money and an ass.

 

When I was in Thailand, I literally couldn't understand my British friends there for the first few weeks. Between the slang and the cockney, it took some adapting.

[blackpudd1n]

Add your custom spellings to the spellcheck dictionary.

 

Pretty much every spellcheck program ever allows you to do this.

 

FWIW I am Canadian. Think spellchecking aussie is hard? Try figuring what the fuck just happened when your computer starts inserting French Canadian punctuation into everything.

 

lol I'd hate to think

[blackpudd1n]

And once again I'm laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair,I picture puddin sittin in front of her computer cussin a streak that would burn the hair off a cat.... I found this thread later in my surfing. It is strange how a few hundred years can change "english" so as to torment the speakers. 'n ya'll think we're funny with our southern english, heh

 

lol spell check's nothing. When I get going on excel, well, that's when the heavy artillery comes out. Excel somehow induces me to say words that I didn't even know I knew! I'll be sitting quietly at the computer, working away, when suddenly "YOU MOTHER*bleep*ER!!" comes out! My dad thinks it's hilarious. He'll sit there and ask what the computer did to me now, and sit there pissing himself laughing at my expletive-laden explanation. Then I chuck a tantrum and go out side to have a smoke with a final "fuck this mother*bleep*ing bullshit! *Bleep*! *Bleep*! *Bleepy-Bleep Bleep*!"

[Blue elephant]

If you need Excel help, send me a PM. Beenworking with Excel since 1987.

[Realist]

Better not tell the people from the South of Sydney, Sutherland, that. Because everyone knows Sutherland is God's country lol

 

<Ignorant American>

Hey we won World War Two </Ignorant American>

 

 

... yes, agreed, a rather simplistic view of WW2!

[blackpudd1n]

If you need Excel help, send me a PM. Beenworking with Excel since 1987.

 

Thanks for that I don't use it very often (obviously lol), usually only when I'm making up tables for my mum's market stall. I do the admin and number crunching side of things, and the organising. My mum used to be a bookkeeper, and even taught a class on filing at TAFE, but when it came to her own accounts, well, when I offered to start doing it, I got handed a manila envelope of crumpled up receipts.lSo I had to organise a system for filing those receipts for tax purposes in a way that mum could see whether she was behind or in front at the end of every week, and at the end of each financial year would allow her to draw up a profit and loss statement. Then mum was driving me nuts, because she'd turn up each week at the stall with new stuff that she'd made, but it was never the stuff we actually needed on the stall, so we were missing out on impulse buys, because even though we take orders, for most people that is too much of a hassle. So my sister suggested drawing up a weekly stocktake, so excel and I met again. Mum did up the first layout, but I found it too hard to use, so about a week ago I had to re-do it to make it more user-friendly and simpler to use. And that was the last time Excel and I butted heads! But we do need the stocktake- I tell mum what she needs to make each week, and our sales have tripled, because we are selling what people want to buy. It also helps me to keep on track with the trends, and which fabrics are selling and which ones aren't. So glad I don't have to visit Excel often, though. I think I've finally got the lay-out right for the stocktake

[ShackledNoMore]

If you need Excel help, send me a PM. Beenworking with Excel since 1987.

So why is Excel so powerful and so lacking at the same time!? (Rhetorical question.)

[ShackledNoMore]

And once again I'm laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair,I picture puddin sittin in front of her computer cussin a streak that would burn the hair off a cat.... I found this thread later in my surfing. It is strange how a few hundred years can change "english" so as to torment the speakers. 'n ya'll think we're funny with our southern english, heh

 

lol spell check's nothing. When I get going on excel, well, that's when the heavy artillery comes out. Excel somehow induces me to say words that I didn't even know I knew! I'll be sitting quietly at the computer, working away, when suddenly "YOU MOTHER*bleep*ER!!" comes out! My dad thinks it's hilarious. He'll sit there and ask what the computer did to me now, and sit there pissing himself laughing at my expletive-laden explanation. Then I chuck a tantrum and go out side to have a smoke with a final "fuck this mother*bleep*ing bullshit! *Bleep*! *Bleep*! *Bleepy-Bleep Bleep*!"

I've actually never seen an Australian cursing up a storm. I think that's something I'd like to see!

[blackpudd1n]

And once again I'm laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair,I picture puddin sittin in front of her computer cussin a streak that would burn the hair off a cat.... I found this thread later in my surfing. It is strange how a few hundred years can change "english" so as to torment the speakers. 'n ya'll think we're funny with our southern english, heh

 

lol spell check's nothing. When I get going on excel, well, that's when the heavy artillery comes out. Excel somehow induces me to say words that I didn't even know I knew! I'll be sitting quietly at the computer, working away, when suddenly "YOU MOTHER*bleep*ER!!" comes out! My dad thinks it's hilarious. He'll sit there and ask what the computer did to me now, and sit there pissing himself laughing at my expletive-laden explanation. Then I chuck a tantrum and go out side to have a smoke with a final "fuck this mother*bleep*ing bullshit! *Bleep*! *Bleep*! *Bleepy-Bleep Bleep*!"

I've actually never seen an Australian cursing up a storm. I think that's something I'd like to see!

 

Australians swear a lot. But it is generally frowned upon to swear in front of people when you don't know if they will take offense to your swearing. For instance- out of respect to the older generation and the views they may have on swearing, only a dick would just shoot off the mouth with them around. It is generally unacceptable to swear around children, and while it is natural for everyone to swear a bit, a parent swearing up a storm in front of their children is looked down upon. I think many Aussies would like to know where the other person stands on swearing before they just let rip, or drop any bomb at all. Many men moderate their swearing around women, out of respect. And there is a bit of an etiquette when it comes to swearing. A constant foul mouth is just tawdry. But when someone is extremely upset, swearing used as emphasis is quite okay. We also have conversational swearing, where a bit of swearing among other swearers, or for emphasis on the story is okay- the tone of swearing is unoffensive and not directed at anybody. I will swear at things, about things, about situations when discussing them with another, or because I stubbed my toe, but I do not actually swear AT anyone. Unless it is a term of endearment or a joke among friends- I might call a friend a bitch in a light-hearted way, but once again, it must first be established that it is acceptable within the terms of that friendship. So that's probably why you haven't heard an Aussie cursing up a storm. Generally, if we don't know where you stand on the matter, it could be perceived as disrespectful. Actually, the only reason I started swearing on the forum was because I noticed it was tolerated. Otherwise I would never have a single swear word anywhere. Oh, and another thing- the c-word is just not cool over here. If you drop the c-bomb, you'd better have damn good reason for it. Every other swear word, especially when used in context, is pretty much acceptable. There are very few occasions when the c-word will be tolerated- it's just so offensive to the majority of people.

[ShackledNoMore]

The c-word as in a vulgar term for the female anatomy? (I would just come out and say it, but I don't want to cause offense. ) Perhaps it's strong by virtue of the fact that it has misogynistic overtones, but in America I would say it does not stand out over other strong language in a class by itself for offensiveness.

 

It's funny. People swear. I don't want my kids to be afraid of language like I was raised to be, or freak out over mere words. On the other hand, I want them to use language well, and I think that means growing up to not wear out swear words with overuse. I live the example for them: they don't have virgin protected ears, but they hear little cursing at home. Interestingly enough, my daughter has been known to be a bit indignant when she hears occasional light cursing from me!

 

You know it was years after I deconverted before people seemed to feel comfortable swearing in front of me? It still amazes me that I obviously sent off the signals even though I wasn't offended in the least. Eventually it tapered off, and it is rare now for someone to apologize after they swear in front of me.

 

I think a lot of the reason I'd like to hear Aussies swear is that it's hard to picture as vulgar when spoken with that cool accent! It would be really novel from my outsider's perspective!

[blackpudd1n]

The c-word as in a vulgar term for the female anatomy? (I would just come out and say it, but I don't want to cause offense. ) Perhaps it's strong by virtue of the fact that it has misogynistic overtones, but in America I would say it does not stand out over other strong language in a class by itself for offensiveness.

 

It's funny. People swear. I don't want my kids to be afraid of language like I was raised to be, or freak out over mere words. On the other hand, I want them to use language well, and I think that means growing up to not wear out swear words with overuse. I live the example for them: they don't have virgin protected ears, but they hear little cursing at home. Interestingly enough, my daughter has been known to be a bit indignant when she hears occasional light cursing from me!

 

You know it was years after I deconverted before people seemed to feel comfortable swearing in front of me? It still amazes me that I obviously sent off the signals even though I wasn't offended in the least. Eventually it tapered off, and it is rare now for someone to apologize after they swear in front of me.

 

I think a lot of the reason I'd like to hear Aussies swear is that it's hard to picture as vulgar when spoken with that cool accent! It would be really novel from my outsider's perspective!

 

Yeah, you got the right c-word. It makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

 

As to it being vulgar, trust me, it can be. I think, though, it has a lot to do with how the person talks to begin with. Some Aussies seem to like to over-emphasise their accent, and it sounds pretty awful without a single swear word thrown in. That has a lot to do with how they were raised, the area in which they live, and their socio-economic background. A lot of people seem to find it funny when I swear, because they say I can't even swear without sounding posh. I wasn't raised in a wealthy household or anything like that; in fact, I grew up in the Western Suburbs of Sydney, so the thought that I sound posh in any way at all is extremely amusing to me. I was born half-deaf though; I had a lot of speech therapy, which had some impact on how I speak, and I pick up other people's inflections extremely quickly. My adoptive dad comes from South End in England, so I've picked up a lot of his inflections, which is particularly annoying. I can't even say "garage" properly anymore- it's become "garige". It's pretty embarrassing when you start talking like a bloody pom, even though you've never set foot on English soil!

[Vigile]

Cunt (/ˈkʌnt/) is a vulgarism, primarily referring to the female genitalia,^[1] specifically the vulva, and including the cleft of Venus. The earliest citation of this usage in the 1972 Oxford English Dictionary, c 1230, refers to the London street known as Gropecunt Lane. Scholar Germaine Greer has said that "it is one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock."^[2]

Cunt is also used informally as a derogatory epithet in referring to a person of either sex, but this usage is relatively recent, dating back only as far as the late nineteenth century.^[3] Reflecting different national usages, the Compact Oxford English Dictionary defines cunt as "an unpleasant or stupid person", whereas Merriam-Webster has a usage of the term as "usually disparaging & obscene: woman",^[4] noting that it is used in the US as "an offensive way to refer to a woman";^[5] the Macquarie Dictionary of Australian English defines it as "a despicable man", however when used with a positive qualifier (good, funny, clever, etc.) in countries such as Britain, New Zealand and Australia, it conveys a positive sense of the object or person referred to.^[6]

The word appears to have been in common usage from the Middle Ages until the eighteenth century. After a period of disuse, usage became more frequent in the twentieth century, in parallel with the rise of popular literature and pervasive media. The term also has various other derived uses and, like fuck and its derivatives, has been used mutatis mutandis as noun, pronoun, adjective, participle and other parts of speech. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cunt

 

 

 

Research into swearing

 

Swearing and cursing are modes of speech existing in all human languages. They perform certain social and psychological functions, and utilize particular linguistic and neurological mechanisms; all these are avenues of research. Functionally similar behavior can be observed in chimpanzees, and may contribute to our understanding, notes New York Time author Natalie Angier.^[6]

Angier also notes that swearing is a widespread but perhaps underappreciated anger management technique; that "men generally curse more than women, unless said women are in a sorority, and that university provosts swear more than librarians or the staff members of the university day care center"; and that linguistic research has shown that the physiological reactions of individuals who are proud of their education are similar between exposure to obscene words and exposure to bad grammar.^[6]

Profane language is by no means a recent phenomenon. The Bible sometimes uses strong language, such as mention of men who "eat their own dung, and drink their own piss" in the Authorized King James Version of 1611's close translation of Hebrew text of 2 Kings 18:27. Shakespeare is replete with vulgarisms, though many are no longer readily recognized. Even the oldest traces of human writing include swear words.^{[citation needed]}

Keele University researchers Stephens, Atkins, and Kingston found that swearing relieves the effects of physical pain.^[7] Stephens said "I would advise people, if they hurt themselves, to swear".^[8] However, the overuse of swear words tends to diminish this effect.^[8] The team earned themselves the Ig Nobel Peace Prize in 2010 for the research. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Profanity

[blackpudd1n]

Cunt (/ˈkʌnt/) is a vulgarism, primarily referring to the female genitalia,^[1] specifically the vulva, and including the cleft of Venus. The earliest citation of this usage in the 1972 Oxford English Dictionary, c 1230, refers to the London street known as Gropecunt Lane. Scholar Germaine Greer has said that "it is one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock."^[2]

Cunt is also used informally as a derogatory epithet in referring to a person of either sex, but this usage is relatively recent, dating back only as far as the late nineteenth century.^[3] Reflecting different national usages, the Compact Oxford English Dictionary defines cunt as "an unpleasant or stupid person", whereas Merriam-Webster has a usage of the term as "usually disparaging & obscene: woman",^[4] noting that it is used in the US as "an offensive way to refer to a woman";^[5] the Macquarie Dictionary of Australian English defines it as "a despicable man", however when used with a positive qualifier (good, funny, clever, etc.) in countries such as Britain, New Zealand and Australia, it conveys a positive sense of the object or person referred to.^[6]

The word appears to have been in common usage from the Middle Ages until the eighteenth century. After a period of disuse, usage became more frequent in the twentieth century, in parallel with the rise of popular literature and pervasive media. The term also has various other derived uses and, like fuck and its derivatives, has been used mutatis mutandis as noun, pronoun, adjective, participle and other parts of speech. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cunt

 

 

I'm going to beg to differ a bit with the dictionary. The c-word is pretty much the greatest insult you can fling at another person over here, male or female. It doesn't mean "a despicable man" to us; by calling another person it, you are saying that they are lower than low. Calling someone a "dog" is harsh, but the c-word goes beyond that. Calling someone the c-word WILL see tempers flare. While some people may use it in a joking context, particularly men, sometimes as a form of endearment towards a mate, just the use of the word is likely to offend someone, even if they are uninvolved in the conversation and happen to hear it. I have discussed it among my own friends and family, and it's just not a place the majority of us are willing to go. It is cruder than crude, and upsets many people.

[Vigile]

It's always going to come down to context. If you call the driver that cuts you off a cunt, you probably mean it. If you call your friend a cunt because he just at the last slice of pizza, you probably don't. At the end of the day, words are just words and we get to choose whether or not they offend us.

 

When I was young my mother used to let me say dang or darn but I couldn't say damn. That always seemed silly to me as they all have the same meaning. This just goes to the idea that we choose to be offended or not.

[ShackledNoMore]

Vig, it's been my experience that damn is considered stronger than dang or darn, too.

 

When I was a teenager, I used to say "cripes." I picked it up from my mother. One day she misheard me. It was not a pleasant day.

 

Pudd, rest assured that in my local world, the c-word is no stronger an expletive than "fuck." Just a tad weaker I would say. Not that I'd ever be likely to use the word if I visited Australia, but it's still good to know that it would be considered so shocking.

[blackpudd1n]

Pudd, rest assured that in my local world, the c-word is no stronger an expletive than "fuck." Just a tad weaker I would say. Not that I'd ever be likely to use the word if I visited Australia, but it's still good to know that it would be considered so shocking.

 

Really? Weaker than fuck? We use fuck all the time, for many different reasons and in many different contexts. That really blows my mind lol. I guess culture really has a lot to do with things.

 

You know, speaking of culture, a lot of people seem to get the impression that we don't really have any in Australia. We do, but we're pretty relaxed on most things. A few years ago I was at work, and I was sorting out the filing room, which was out the back in the warehouse. One of the guys, a older Lebanese man, came to talk to me while I was sorting the files out, and he was very upset. In fact, his whole family was, because his son had gone somewhere and been asked to remove his cap. He thought they were being discriminated against. When we got to that bit, I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa! Back up a bit! I said to him, your son wore a hat inside a building? And he looked at me a bit strange, and said, yeah, and I said to him, that is considered disrespectful in Australian culture. He was like, huh? I explained to him that, going very far back, to not take off your hat indoors is considered a mark of disrespect. I told him that all the way through school, we were not allowed to wear hats inside, and would get in a lot of trouble for it. It is most heavily enforced in Ex-Services Clubs, but you can be asked pretty much anywhere to take your hat off if you go inside. It's a mark of respect. When police are visiting on official business, and they have a hat, they tend to keep them on, and that is okay. Often though, when they come bearing bad news, they remove their hat as a mark of respect. When I finished explaining all of this to my co-worker, he was absolutely horrified that he had initially thought his son was being discriminated against, when in fact his son, through his ignorance, had shown disrespect. When I saw him the next day, he told me he'd gone home and explained it all to his family, and told them that they were not allowed to wear hats inside anymore. Lol, he was such a sweetie. I told him not to stress too much, cultural misunderstandings were bound to happen, but he was adamant that no-one in his family were going to wear a hat inside again.

[ShackledNoMore]

So I just asked my wife. When she finally finished laughing, she said she thought they were about the came, but she seemed to think that c"^+ was slightly more offputting. Fuck is certainly more commonly used.

 

Views on wearing hats indoors seems to be about the same here as in Australia, perhaps a little less frowned upon now than when I was a kid, but I don't see it happening in a primary or secondary school classroom.

[blackpudd1n]

So I just asked my wife. When she finally finished laughing, she said she thought they were about the came, but she seemed to think that c"^+ was slightly more offputting. Fuck is certainly more commonly used.

 

lol

 

Views on wearing hats indoors seems to be about the same here as in Australia, perhaps a little less frowned upon now than when I was a kid, but I don't see it happening in a primary or secondary school classroom.

 

I think it depends also on the geographic location of a town as to how big a deal it is. It's not as big a deal in the city areas as the rural areas. You can still be asked to remove a hat anywhere, and most people will just apologise and get it off their heads. With the Ex-Services Clubs, though, they won't allow you entry until it's off your head.

[Vigile]

The British guys I met in Thailand used the C word far more often than the F word and even told me that the Americans use the F word far more than they. I was under the impression that it was the same in Oz, but I guess Jim Jeffries is an outlier.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3l43EcLObk

[Vigile]

BTW, I wonder how many Americans know what black pudding is.

[blackpudd1n]

The British guys I met in Thailand used the C word far more often than the F word and even told me that the Americans use the F word far more than they. I was under the impression that it was the same in Oz, but I guess Jim Jeffries is an outlier.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3l43EcLObk

 

Just obnoxious humour. Men will joke like that, but usually only around their mates. Do you reckon he'd joke like that at the family barbie with all the kids running around and his mum and nan? He'd probably end up with looks that would make hell freeze over lol

[blackpudd1n]

BTW, I wonder how many Americans know what black pudding is.

 

...Not something I ever want to eat! lol, gross! The name came from my cats. I have two black cats. Before Wednesday came along, Bruce had to go on a diet, and my dad, being English, started teasing that Bruce was a puddin'. Bruce is not one for cutesy nicknames, so it was only ever a joke. But when we got Wednesday, puddin' just seemed to fit as a nickname. it was easier than calling her Wednesday all the time, and instead of saying "where is the kitten", we'd say, "where is the puddin'?" As my dad is English, and from a similar area as my fiancee's English mum, we both tend to say it with the same English inflection