mymistake Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 On the way to church I passed a home made sign that said Jesus would come back any day now. It got me thinking so when I was board during Bible study I crunched the numbers. Jesus has been coming back "any day now" for over seven hundred twenty THOUSAND days now. I you saw a guy put a quarter into a slot machine, pull the handle, and shout "I'm going to win the jackpot any moment now" and he repeated the process 700 times would you doubt his perception of reality? Any minute now I'm gonna win! To put it into perspective: if this were seconds instead of days and some guy told you to wait on a corner because he would meet you there "any second now" would you feel mislead if he still had not arrived eight days later? (I really get board in Bible study.) Any second now he is going to be there and eight days later he still isn't. When do you start to wonder if he ditched you? Jesus Christ ain't coming back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
London Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 This site has a great list of the dates. http://www.bible.ca/pre-date-setters.htm I just love "the end of the world" stories. They just crack me up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Astreja Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 I think this prolonged "Any day now! Really!" nonsense could've been the inspiration for the play Waiting for Godot. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 I like how you occupy your time at Bible study. Waiting for Jesus to come back almost ruined my life. We were told "YOU ARE THE GENERATION!!!!" I am embarrassed to admit I bought it. Now they are saying this to the next generation. Someone ought to sue the bastards. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeCoastie Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 End times theology is really exciting. It makes you feel like you're in a movie, at any moment something huge is going to happen. I think the hardcore adherents of left behind theories are just bored with life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 End times theology is really exciting. It makes you feel like you're in a movie, at any moment something huge is going to happen. ....except that, similar to a movie, the music crescendos to an all time tense high shrill, foretelling a climactic moment that never comes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
London Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 dramatic music Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creative Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 Its like when your parents took you to the doctor or dentist and promise you will get a toy or candy afterwords. You didn't want to go and you hated it. But you got something you wanted. Only difference about this story is that you actually got it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thought2Much Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 Yes, but to the Lord, a day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years is as a day, so to him it's only been the same as about two days! I think I just hurt myself typing that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted February 13, 2012 Author Share Posted February 13, 2012 Yes, but to the Lord, a day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years is as a day, so to him it's only been the same as about two days! I think I just hurt myself typing that. How come we never hear Christians preach that Jesus will come back in the year 7,000? That would make it a "full week" to god. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 Yes, but to the Lord, a day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years is as a day, so to him it's only been the same as about two days! How come we never hear Christians preach that Jesus will come back in the year 7,000? That would make it a "full week" to god. Great point, mm. The imminence is the clincher, isn't it? It's the imminence that controls believers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 The "any day now" has believers by the proverbial balls. At its heart it's controlling and abusive, keeping believers perpetually off balance. A big a-ha moment for me was hearing that "Christianity is just another (failed) doomsday cult." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 The "any day now" has believers by the proverbial balls. At its heart it's controlling and abusive, keeping believers perpetually off balance. A big a-ha moment for me was hearing that "Christianity is just another (failed) doomsday cult." I have never thought of it that way.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzy Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 End times theology is really exciting. It makes you feel like you're in a movie, at any moment something huge is going to happen. I think the hardcore adherents of left behind theories are just bored with life. This is how I thought of it as well. I guess my life is boring. It didn't really scare me, like I see so many people were scared by it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted February 13, 2012 Author Share Posted February 13, 2012 The "any day now" has believers by the proverbial balls. At its heart it's controlling and abusive, keeping believers perpetually off balance. A big a-ha moment for me was hearing that "Christianity is just another (failed) doomsday cult." I have never thought of it that way.... Yeah, if people in the distant past had been told that Jesus will not come back at least until 2012 what would they have done? If they were Christian then your grand parents were told that Jesus would return in their lifetime. And their grandparants were raised to believe the same. And if some cult rose up to claim that the end of the world is 5,000 years from now nobody would pay any attention. It would never catch on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted February 13, 2012 Share Posted February 13, 2012 The "any day now" has believers by the proverbial balls. At its heart it's controlling and abusive, keeping believers perpetually off balance. A big a-ha moment for me was hearing that "Christianity is just another (failed) doomsday cult." I have never thought of it that way.... Yeah, if people in the distant past had been told that Jesus will not come back at least until 2012 what would they have done? If they were Christian then your grand parents were told that Jesus would return in their lifetime. And their grandparants were raised to believe the same. And if some cult rose up to claim that the end of the world is 5,000 years from now nobody would pay any attention. It would never catch on. Makes sense. What kills me is when people are like "yeah we'll see you there unless the rapture happens...." Part of me gets really pissed because I kind of like this planet and there are billions of innocent people who are gonna be punished. Why would xtians want to hasten the rapture, I mean most of them (myself included when I was a xtian) didn't do anything to bring their fellow people to Christ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 End times is like coitus without climax, very frustrating. Aka mental masturbation. With the way the English language has changed, Jesus is coming soon has some weird connotations, he was after all a virgin and all. I love sexual analogies, christianity is one big mind fuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 I think everyday life tends to suck so much that many people's morbid fantasy of a dramatic conclusion to an unfulfilled existence gets the better of them. That's why I'm a nihilist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 End times is like coitus without climax, very frustrating. Aka mental masturbation. With the way the English language has changed, Jesus is coming soon has some weird connotations, he was after all a virgin and all. I love sexual analogies, christianity is one big mind fuck. Again, if he's a 2000 year old virgin...my guess is that nothing's gonna work too well at that point whether he's god or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts