Zephie Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 My ex-fiance has my mail address. This Friday, I recieved a letter from him which he no doubt timed to arrive on my birthday. The letter was the same mental and emotional bullshit he spouted when we were together. It contained copius amounts of exclamation points as well as manipulative statements. Of course I thought about posting it on youtube with my snarky yet witty narrations. He made some good points about all the amazing things that I can and will do without him (such as travel, live out of state, make BIG $$$, etc). However his list of things that I wouldn't have without him (such as a husband, children, emotional support, and a warm-bed) simply served to show what a massive shit head he is. Hello, there are pletny of amazing men out there. I will eventually marry and, yes, I will have children at some point. Even if I don't my life is so much fuller now without him. It's like he thinks that I won't be able to have a normal life without him and that really cracks me up. It is fucking hilarious!!! Since I've left him, I've lost weight, am finally dealing with my mental issues, finished my MA, gonna start my doctorate, will move out of state, met a pretty cool guy, reconnected with friends, and left xtianity. His final conclusion was that he was not good enough for me. Sadly, no he wasn't. An abusive asshole is never going to be good enough for me. I would have died and have wondered, quite often, when he would have hit me after losing his temper. Finally, in a last showing of his shit-headedness, he bitched because I didn't text him on his birthday. Now why would I text someone whose last words to me were, "YOU USELESS FUCKING BITCH!!! I HOPE YOUR LIFE IS MISERABLE!!!" Yeah, I'm totally gonna send you a text. Right. I am so done with his abusive bullshit. I am betting money that he will send me yet another letter for our wedding date which is this Saturday (well was this Saturday)...which I will mark return to sender. The kicker in all of this is that he posts that "God is still my rock". Right. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator buffettphan Posted March 5, 2012 Super Moderator Share Posted March 5, 2012 Sure am glad you got out of that relationship before you married that dickhead! 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 Hello, there are pletny of amazing men out there. I will eventually marry and, yes, I will have children at some point. Even if I don't my life is so much fuller now without him. Good on you for recognizing this. It's like he thinks that I won't be able to have a normal life without him and that really cracks me up. He sounds desperate to me. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 5, 2012 Author Share Posted March 5, 2012 Hello, there are pletny of amazing men out there. I will eventually marry and, yes, I will have children at some point. Even if I don't my life is so much fuller now without him. Good on you for recognizing this. It's like he thinks that I won't be able to have a normal life without him and that really cracks me up. He sounds desperate to me. He is sadly incredibly desperate, otherwise he would not have contacted me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsRoper Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 Ignore his ass. He probably as a personality disorder. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeCoastie Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 You've moved on, grown stronger, smarter, and better. The chump sounds as worthless as the day you left him. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted March 5, 2012 Moderator Share Posted March 5, 2012 My ex-fiance has my mail address. This Friday, I recieved a letter from him which he no doubt timed to arrive on my birthday. The letter was the same mental and emotional bullshit he spouted when we were together. It contained copius amounts of exclamation points as well as manipulative statements. Of course I thought about posting it on youtube with my snarky yet witty narrations. He made some good points about all the amazing things that I can and will do without him (such as travel, live out of state, make BIG $$$, etc). However his list of things that I wouldn't have without him (such as a husband, children, emotional support, and a warm-bed) simply served to show what a massive shit head he is. Hello, there are pletny of amazing men out there. I will eventually marry and, yes, I will have children at some point. Even if I don't my life is so much fuller now without him. It's like he thinks that I won't be able to have a normal life without him and that really cracks me up. It is fucking hilarious!!! Since I've left him, I've lost weight, am finally dealing with my mental issues, finished my MA, gonna start my doctorate, will move out of state, met a pretty cool guy, reconnected with friends, and left xtianity. His final conclusion was that he was not good enough for me. Sadly, no he wasn't. An abusive asshole is never going to be good enough for me. I would have died and have wondered, quite often, when he would have hit me after losing his temper. Finally, in a last showing of his shit-headedness, he bitched because I didn't text him on his birthday. Now why would I text someone whose last words to me were, "YOU USELESS FUCKING BITCH!!! I HOPE YOUR LIFE IS MISERABLE!!!" Yeah, I'm totally gonna send you a text. Right. I am so done with his abusive bullshit. I am betting money that he will send me yet another letter for our wedding date which is this Saturday (well was this Saturday)...which I will mark return to sender. The kicker in all of this is that he posts that "God is still my rock". Right. you go girl!! I loved this post zephie.You got your shit together girlfriend. If I could just go back to 29 again and know what I know now!! You're a smart girl chickie! You be 'healthy minded' and you will attract a healthy minded man. You ever want encouragent to make it as a woman........you PM aunt Margee....I'll be right there to help!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ireckinso Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 I wouldn't dignify him with a response.Thats what people like this are looking for. If you respond then he will think there is some small hope of interest. Good luck and don't let him hit you with that God Rock when he throws it at you!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 5, 2012 Author Share Posted March 5, 2012 I wouldn't dignify him with a response.Thats what people like this are looking for. If you respond then he will think there is some small hope of interest. Good luck and don't let him hit you with that God Rock when he throws it at you!! I ended up tearing the letter up and throwing it away at a gas station. Mostly I think the "god rock" is a lot of hot air 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted March 5, 2012 Share Posted March 5, 2012 My wife fell in that trap years ago. The stories she has told me about that relationship are just unfuckingbelieveable. She was with this dude for 9 years. He was the most charming gentleman in public but when they were alone he was Mr. Hyde. People will always ask the question, "Why didn't you leave him sooner?" Easy to say, hard to do when you're under control of a master manipulator. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 5, 2012 Author Share Posted March 5, 2012 My wife fell in that trap years ago. The stories she has told me about that relationship are just unfuckingbelieveable. She was with this dude for 9 years. He was the most charming gentleman in public but when they were alone he was Mr. Hyde. People will always ask the question, "Why didn't you leave him sooner?" Easy to say, hard to do when you're under control of a master manipulator. So true. I was only with him for 5 months...I cannot imagine 9 years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
older Posted March 6, 2012 Share Posted March 6, 2012 Zephie: You are a strong woman. Good for you! And yes, there are nice guys out there and you will find one. This creep sounds like someone who might not give up easily. Give some thought as to when you move how you might do it without leaving a trail for him to follow. Tell your friends not to give him your new address. Do not leave a forwarding mail address as he can get that through the post office. Have your mail forwarded to a commercial mailbox service and then have them send it on to you. Stay away from social networking sites that would allow him to track you down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 6, 2012 Author Share Posted March 6, 2012 Zephie: You are a strong woman. Good for you! And yes, there are nice guys out there and you will find one. This creep sounds like someone who might not give up easily. Give some thought as to when you move how you might do it without leaving a trail for him to follow. Tell your friends not to give him your new address. Do not leave a forwarding mail address as he can get that through the post office. Have your mail forwarded to a commercial mailbox service and then have them send it on to you. Stay away from social networking sites that would allow him to track you down. I've already changed my number and have told the only friend who is in contact with him not to give him my number. She was there when I last saw him and she knows how bad his temper is. I've already gotten off of facebook permanently so no worries there. I am planning to move out of state for purposes other than getting away from him. So yes, he is a creep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FeelHappy Posted March 6, 2012 Share Posted March 6, 2012 I was in a pretty bad relationship for a year, I waited around for her to return to her charming self until it just became too bad to wait any longer. I can imagine that having children or being married would make it that much worse. I can fully see how someone goes 9 years that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted March 6, 2012 Share Posted March 6, 2012 If you find any more letters from him you could just leave them in your mailbox. Write on the front of the letter "Refused - return to sender" with an arrow pointing to the return address. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted March 6, 2012 Share Posted March 6, 2012 If you find any more letters from him you could just leave them in your mailbox. Write on the front of the letter "Refused - return to sender" with an arrow pointing to the return address. Right. My wife found out the hard way that even trying to be civil just invites more contact. Eventually the stalking and "coincidental" run ins stopped. And yes, if you haven't already you'll have to adjust your security settings on Facebook (if you have an account) cause I think if you comment on something that your friend wrote who he is friends with he will be able to see it. Also, tell your friends to not tag you in any pictures as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 I'm so cheering for you for getting out of that shitty relationship! YOU GO GIRL! Good job! Agree with the others who advise not accepting any communications. Controllers will do ANYTHING to sink their hooks into you, and his efforts will only get more desperate if he thinks there's even a ghost of a chance of his making contact. Refuse his mail, block online communications, whatever you have to do to not even accept anything he tries to send, do it. It's just not wise to even invite a dialogue with someone that desperately controlling. Which is why, when my Evil Ex's fiancee sent me a I fucking kid you not invitation to their wedding, I didn't do what I wanted to do, which was send a gift and a thank-you for her finally taking my stalker off my hands and a heartfelt prayer that she would never have reason to fear him like I did, but instead simply marked it return to sender and put it back in the mailbox. That's also why I finally just began sending his emails straight on to his ISPs instead of responding to them. I think I cost him like 3 ISPs in one year before he finally stopped bothering me. In a tiny town like his, that's pretty serious! It drives controllers nuts when you just don't communicate or rise to their bait, but it makes them get the point faster. Again: YOU GO GIRL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Galien Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 Only rocks this loser has are in his head. Good on you for establishing healthy boundaries and leaving this guy behind. Does he have a scripture reference from his god the rock on the disgraceful use of language in the text message he sent you? Dodgy prick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wings Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 Congrats on getting out of that relationship and moving forward! I know that you know you're so much better without him, but anytime you need a reminder, hit me up and I'll read your words back to you!! I too was also in an emotionally abusive relationship and it's so hard to leave, but so incredibly freeing... hope you can just ignore him and that life continues to be all the amazing things you can make it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kurari Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 What a useless fucktard. Living well and being happy will be the best revenge on his ass ever. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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