jackbauer Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 I've been reading some articles on the blogs. As always, there is some Christbot trying to win us back using the same arguements we've heard time and time again. Since I've been extremely bored, I've devoloped some responses to them. Christbot: "God will never leave you" Response: "Well, it looks like I have nothing to worry about." Christbot: "Hell was created for the devil and his angels." Response: "Then I'm safe" In both of these cases, you can call them out. If they try to say "Well you still go to hell for rejecting Jesus", then you can tell them that it was completely pointless to say hell was created for the devil and his angels. Same thing with god never leaving you. If that's true, than we have nothing to worry about because god will not leave us (even if we don't feel him). Christbot: "You need to rely on Jesus's work, not your own." Response: "Fine. I'll just continue living my life as obviously nothing I do matters" Seriously, if we shouldn't rely on our own works, we have nothing to worry about, nor do we have any control over the outcome. That's why the Jesus thing makes no sense. Of course, the Christian will try to spin this into saying that we still have to accept Jesus's gift. That's when we can tell them that it is exactly what we were trying to do. If god wanted us to be saved, wouldn't he make the gift of salvation easy to obtain? It's like trying to find a hidden block in Super Mario Bros. It may be freely offered, but you sure have to look to find the damn thing. These may not win any arguements because with Christians (especially Christbots), they will always have something to fall back on. But at least it will force them to admit that their expressions are bullshit. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
older Posted March 10, 2012 Share Posted March 10, 2012 I just tell them that I want to go to hell so I can be with my friends. That usually ends the conversation. On the rare occasion when it's a more drawn-out discussion, I point out that by Christian standards, Mohandas Gandhi will not be admitted to heaven, and in such a case, I want to go where he went. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dyanaprajna0 Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 I've just become too cynical in dealing with fundy xtians. If they ever attempt to engage me in proselytizing, I just tell them "heard it, hated it, leave me the hell alone." I simply don't tolerate them anymore. I swat them away like an annoying fly. But, I am starting to use this one under specific circumstances: Fundy: you know you'll go to hell if you don't accept jeezus, right? Me: Good. That's what I want. Fundy: you really want to go to hell? Me: Yep, wanna know why? Fundy: yes Me: to spend an eternity beating YOUR ass. If done right, lulz are had. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 Why in heck did I not think of this while I was fundie? I'd rather go to hell to be with my mother, an ex-communicated Catholic (don't get me started about the rage I still feel over that one). Why was I ever so fucking selfish that I thought it was okay to abandon my mother, who never did anything but think of her kids first, always? I can't stand Christians who gloat about their ringside seats enjoying watching sinners fry. Never did. But the sheer inhumanity and selfishness on display never hit me, really, till this thread. If god genuinely has sent truly good people like Gandhi and my mother to hell, then I don't want to go to heaven while they suffer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owen652 Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 also, remember that in heaven all tears are wiped away there is no more sadness. which is impossible if you are aware that your loved ones are writhing in agony in the cellar. can't believe i once fell for it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dyanaprajna0 Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 I'm surprised that anyone here is surprised that xtians think that when they're in heaven they'll get to see unbelieving family and friends roast is something bad to xtians. They like torturing unbelievers now, whether they know the person or not. Family, friends, strangers, it doesn't matter. They hate unbelievers, regardless of who they are to the xtian. So I don't find it a huge stretch to think that they will enjoy watching people burn in hell who they once considered family and friends in life. It seems to fit their MO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notaxtian Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 I just tell them that I want to go to hell so I can be with my friends. That usually ends the conversation. On the rare occasion when it's a more drawn-out discussion, I point out that by Christian standards, Mohandas Gandhi will not be admitted to heaven, and in such a case, I want to go where he went. Good response! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notaxtian Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 I just thought of one a while ago. "You can't enjoy life without God." I say "That's nonsense!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsRoper Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 "heard it, hated it, leave me the hell alone." This is the best sentence I have ever read. I just laughed out loud, wondering what the little old Jehovah Witnesses ladies will think if I say this next time they knock on my door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsRoper Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 Heaven as they describe it is in actuality hell, because if you end up there you'll be with fundies, and I think burning to death for eternity is actually heaven in comparison. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inqui Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 I'm surprised that anyone here is surprised that xtians think that when they're in heaven they'll get to see unbelieving family and friends roast is something bad to xtians. They like torturing unbelievers now, whether they know the person or not. Family, friends, strangers, it doesn't matter. They hate unbelievers, regardless of who they are to the xtian. So I don't find it a huge stretch to think that they will enjoy watching people burn in hell who they once considered family and friends in life. It seems to fit their MO. Hell appeals perfectly to human nature. When someone feels someone should be punished but is powerless to do so, it's great to think of an otherworldly place for the wicked (but not them of course!) to get their deserved punishment. That's why too many people are smug about good people going to hell and still deserving it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 I could never reconcile the two. I mean I know so many people who are good people. Better people than I am. It never made sense to me how God could possibly send them to hell. I never got any answers otherwise either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackbauer Posted March 15, 2012 Author Share Posted March 15, 2012 "God is waiting you to come back with open arms" (Anytime someone tries to tell us that God has been misrepresented to us and is not the complete monster the Bible makes him out to be.) Response: "That's okay, already tried God. I'm actually much happier now". A nice, polite response that gets to the meat of the issue. You're happier without religion and don't want to be sucked back in. If they try to guilt you or threaten you with a bad afterlife, you can expose them to their true intentions and that God is NOT really as nice as they make him out to be. Christian: "It's not a religion it's a relationship with Jesus Christ" Response: "He knows my number" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 "God is waiting you to come back with open arms" (Anytime someone tries to tell us that God has been misrepresented to us and is not the complete monster the Bible makes him out to be.) Response: "That's okay, already tried God. I'm actually much happier now". A nice, polite response that gets to the meat of the issue. You're happier without religion and don't want to be sucked back in. If they try to guilt you or threaten you with a bad afterlife, you can expose them to their true intentions and that God is NOT really as nice as they make him out to be. Christian: "It's not a religion it's a relationship with Jesus Christ" Response: "He knows my number" Yeah but he's not faithful. Doesn't use protection. Nor return phone calls. He sleeps around with everyone. I mean have you listened to everyone talking about good it feels when he's inside them? Nuh-uh, I don't know where he's been. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsRoper Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Classic Zephie! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephie Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Classic Zephie! Thank ya! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paine Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 TO BE WITH MY FRIENDS!!!!! Best line of the thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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