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'coming Out' On Facebook - Rather Uneventful..

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So I finally decided to announce to my old church crowd on Facebook that I was no longer a believer. For the last year I had only kept it known to a handful of people as I was still attending church about once every three weeks (mainly just to catch up with people). I knew that once they all found out, then it was basically social suicide and it would be extremely awkward to walk back into church anytime soon.

 

My announcement to about 60 church people that have known me most of my life went almost totally ignored. Sure I hadn't been attending church much, but I thought I'd at least get a few sympathy comments of "my condolences" or "sorry to hear about your loss" rolleyes.gif

 

All up, four people responded, two of which I have rarely spoken to in the past.

 

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. Perhaps they simply don't care and think I should know better since I grew up in church and know "the truth".

 

For an announcement that I had somewhat stressed about, it turned out to be rather uneventful.

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Maybe they're already disassociating themselves with you.

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It may be that it will take a few days for all those church going facebook friends to read your annoucement and come up with a reaction. I hope it continues to go smoothly. And I hope , rather than "social suicide," you experience a great social life among friends of more or less like mind. That's always a postive thing, so I hear.

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I kind of find that odd. Perhaps since you've not been as around as much you're no longer in their click?

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No news is good news. I hope they continue to leave you alone.

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Maybe they're all talking to each other, and planning an intervention.

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No news is good news. I hope they continue to leave you alone.

 

I concur. Maybe it wasn't so surprising to them afterall?

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Here' my $0.02 about why this is so - it could be a number of things, but one of the most likely scenarios I think for most christians that see another "leave the flock" is that the remaining believers know intuitively, subconciously, that there's a very real chance that what they're professing to believe in is a crock - just like every other religion in the world is to them. How can you REALLY think that every other faith is wrong, and nothing but lies, but YOU happen to be a lucky part of "the one true religion"? Without any proof, the religion you were born and raised into just happens to be the one thats really real? Generally, I think people are smart enough to realize this even though most Xians would never admit publicly their faith could be in vain. So, I think your departure is, to them, probably something that they can see the logic in, even if they won't admit it. They're ignoring it because they have no proof to back up their claims that it IS true.

 

or maybe they're planning a witch-roast.

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I think there is truth to what Agord said, as well as mymistake's feelings on the matter. Fuck 'em.

 

I left a fundie school to go to a (secular) magnet school, and when I went back to visit, two students and two teachers were happy to see me. The rest just acted like I fell off their radar, and didn't really exist for them anymore. I was openly non-christian, and happy I was gone from there. I even remember one of the teachers going "I bet you're so damn glad to be out of here. I wish I was." He left the next year. xD

 

Even in person, it's normal for some churchies to go "Oh, you exist?" They have the memories of goldfish.

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i just had the same experience. i told my sister via email, and by extension my whole family, and haven't heard a damn thing. which is weird. oh well. WIN!

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Even in person, it's normal for some churchies to go "Oh, you exist?" They have the memories of goldfish.

 

It's true that with church attendance it's usually a case of: "out of sight, out of mind". I was thinking about what I would do in the same circumstance, and if I had somewhat of an acquaintance with that person, I'd at least write something. Oh well. Time to move on. One of the reasons I wanted to post on Facebook is because I know it would affect some people, even if only subconsciously. To this day, I still remember people in church that rejected christianity, and it always stuck in my mind.

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what-really-gets-thumbs-up-on-facebook.jpg

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what-really-gets-thumbs-up-on-facebook.jpg

 

^^^GREAT. +1,000,000

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what-really-gets-thumbs-up-on-facebook.jpg

laugh.pngGONZ9729CustomImage1541245.giflaugh.png

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I think that took a lot of courage to come out on FB.

Maybe over time you will get more responses. Also, I wonder if in some ways it's like a shunning....internet shunning?

You know what I mean.

 

If anything, you are being true to yourself & none of them can take that from you.

PS I think it would be kind of neat if others who you have known in the past, who got out of christianity would get in touch w/ you just to see how you are doing.

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If you're lucky it will stay quiet. I've been pretty vocal about my apostasy (great word, that) because I'm just an extroverted kinda guy. I've been ganged up on a couple times by former Christian friends (several still acquaintances whom I'd have lunch with or somesuch - no hard feelings on my part.) I've had a couple friends who have accepted my unconditionally and treat me exactly the same as they did before (including one of the pastors - although I think other might still do so too, we just never see each other.) After I was ganged up on once, I had another mutual friend contact me in PM apologizing for their aggressiveness and letting me know that he didn't think that was right and hope things go well for me.

 

It takes all kinds, and all kinds are out there. You'll be okay, but I think in the end you will need a new group of friends :) Good luck.

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Even in person, it's normal for some churchies to go "Oh, you exist?" They have the memories of goldfish.

 

It's true that with church attendance it's usually a case of: "out of sight, out of mind". I was thinking about what I would do in the same circumstance, and if I had somewhat of an acquaintance with that person, I'd at least write something. Oh well. Time to move on. One of the reasons I wanted to post on Facebook is because I know it would affect some people, even if only subconsciously. To this day, I still remember people in church that rejected christianity, and it always stuck in my mind.

Its like leaving any social institution. Consider how many friends you had in highschool, and how many did you keep in contact with? Its at that point you realize who you were really tight with and who your real friends are.

I never really had a church life. I'd just go on Sunday and go home. I tried youth groups, but I never really fit in.

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