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What Happened?


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My mother was raised an atheist.


My father was never circumcised.


How the hell did I end up a circumcised Christian?


Well it's quite simple, my friends. My mother couldn't stand the idea that there wasn't a god and decided to become a Christian. She thought hard about this decision and tried to inform herself by never reading the bible and apparently ignoring everything she had ever heard in science class. I feel sorry for my grandfather, an atheist that practices Buddhism, because he tried so hard to raise her right and look what happened.


My father found his foreskin rather bothersome, what with the cleaning, and decided to circumcise all his little boys out of the kindness of his heart. Of course, he would never circumcise himself. Oh no, that would be going too far. Circumcision is only for those who can't refuse, silly!


I think I'm gonna go bang my head against a wall...

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