Jump to content
Goodbye Jesus

Christian Lines That Make You Rage!


Cryptic

Recommended Posts

 

 

That should be criminal. It's torture.

Apparently the evangelist was at the top of a stairwell with the guy's mother in arm's reach. If that's the case, he owes Jesus Crust a lot of thanks.

 

This guy's able to laugh about it now, so I have a lot of respect for him in that regard.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A friend of mine admitted she has beliefs that she knows aren't logical or don't make any sense but that she keeps them anyway. Recently I came round to asking her why she hangs onto them. Her answer?

 

"Lack of evidence for something isn't evidence for it not being true."

 

A few months ago I'd have had to bite my tongue to not flip out at that kind of reasoning, but I've kind of come to a point where I've started thinking that if they want to be deluded they can have their fun.

 

Does this mean that she recognizes that the evidence is lacking? Maybe she'll circle back to that recognition and wake up some day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A friend of mine admitted she has beliefs that she knows aren't logical or don't make any sense but that she keeps them anyway. Recently I came round to asking her why she hangs onto them. Her answer?

 

"Lack of evidence for something isn't evidence for it not being true."

 

 

 

I think she means 'absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.' Which, of course, is why the famous teapot orbiting Mars cannot be disproven.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Might be a little off topic, but I would be pretty raged if any of these lines were spoken at my funeral.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I asked him a question about the Bible that he couldn't answer because it would make X look bad, my Sunday School teacher said we should "give it over to God."

 

"I know in my heart X saved me. I see his grace in my life." People who say this have no

particular reason for being an Xian.

"God amazes me every day."

"O lord, we just ask for your blessing upon us." I got sick of hearing this every Sunday.

"Well, God can do anything he wants. He's God."

"O lord, we just praise you..." Another churchy

favorite.

"I just pray that you'll come back to X. He loves you and he is waiting patiently for you." The holy zombies are coming for our brains.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to...

what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so

"inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes

use technology to adapt to and get around

disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

Apparently you haven't met many disabled people. Notice I said "people." They are humans,

not apes. I know some who are quadriplegics:

they can't move anything below their necks, so

they can only get around in a wheelchair that

someone pushes. Because they can't speak,

they have to communicate with a device about

the size of an air-conditioner that is strapped to

their wheelchair. They spend most of their lives

in day care. People with severe mental

disabilities don't go to high school, not to

mention college. They get to sit in a play room

and make macaroni art.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to... what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so "inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes use technology to adapt to and get around disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

And if God "has a plan" for me? IT'S A SHIT PLAN! I could have done better, and I have NO ATTENTION SPAN!

 

As a disabled person, I agree and thank you. I'm not being a hero, or any thing special; I'm just trying to get on with life the best way I can through whatever accommodations work for me. If any religious simpleton tried to hold me up as an "inspiration" of god's love (or whatever godly emotion disabled people inspire in idjits), I'd be tempted to ram my electric scooter into their private area at full speed.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Super Moderator
I'd be tempted to ram my electric scooter into their private area at full speed.

I would pay to see that.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

A couple more I thought of.

 

"Not perfect, just forgiven": I can just picture that smug Christian smile when saying this.

 

"God works through people": I've posted about this line before and the more I think about it, the more I realize how STUPID of a belief this is. By that logic, any human action can be acredited to God because "God works through people". Never mind the fact that you can't see or hear from God, you're just supposed to accept certain people are being used by God. That means that anyone can be God's spokesperson and demand something because "he works through people!" Even though if God wanted to, he could just communicate in a way that can not be corrupted.

 

"Faith not feeling": BULLSHIT. The whole religion is based on "feeling" cause it's not based on any logic. How else do you know you're saved if you can't use any of your five senses? Or are you just supposed to blindly accept everything the pastor says without validating it? If that's the case, than I can be brided into believing anything.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to...

what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so

"inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes

use technology to adapt to and get around

disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

Apparently you haven't met many disabled people. Notice I said "people." They are humans,

not apes. I know some who are quadriplegics:

they can't move anything below their necks, so

they can only get around in a wheelchair that

someone pushes. Because they can't speak,

they have to communicate with a device about

the size of an air-conditioner that is strapped to

their wheelchair. They spend most of their lives

in day care. People with severe mental

disabilities don't go to high school, not to

mention college. They get to sit in a play room

and make macaroni art.

 

Two things: I AM DISABLED.

 

And: What the fuck was God's "plan" for them, then?

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderator

God's timing is always perfect.

You will get a yes, no, or wait answer......................Wendybanghead.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another one is "god bless"

 

I don't even know what that's supposed to mean anymore. God bless you! Unless it's not part of his plan......if that's the case, you're fucked.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Not perfect, just forgiven": I can just picture that smug Christian smile when saying this.

 

Holy fuck, this one drives me bugshit. "I'm not perfect, but still better than you." Fuck off, asstard.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"It's not a religion, it's a relationship!"

 

Yeah, but a relationship with religious tenets.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Bible interprets itself.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"It's not a religion, it's a relationship!"

 

Ugh, I'm so sick of that line! It IS a religion, they just tell people it isn't so they might have more interest in it. It still requires you to do certain religious things and believe in religious things. Just about everything that comes out of the mouth of a Christian about their god or religion pisses me off!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

330.jpg

I hate anything said along the lines of this stupid git.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to...

what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so

"inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes

use technology to adapt to and get around

disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

Apparently you haven't met many disabled people. Notice I said "people."

They are humans,

not apes. I know some who are quadriplegics:

they can't move anything below their necks, so

they can only get around in a wheelchair that

someone pushes. Because they can't speak,

they have to communicate with a device about

the size of an air-conditioner that is strapped to

their wheelchair. They spend most of their lives

in day care. People with severe mental

disabilities don't go to high school, not to

mention college. They get to sit in a play room

and make macaroni art.

 

Two things: I AM DISABLED.

 

And: What the fuck was God's "plan" for them, then?

 

1) I'm sorry for that, but you are not disabled like some people are or you would not be here.

2) I never said God has a plan for them. Terrible things just happen.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"The husband is the spiritual leader of the home."

 

Rubbish. They disguise blatant prejudice to lure unsuspecting seekers, who then become entrenched in the X-loves-you security blanket.

Also to keep women telling themselves that their husbands aren't ACTUALLY in control over

them, so wives can keep their subservient

position.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"The husband is the spiritual leader of the home."

 

Rubbish. They disguise blatant prejudice to lure unsuspecting seekers, who then become entrenched in the X-loves-you security blanket.

Also to keep women telling themselves that their husbands aren't ACTUALLY in control over

them, so wives can keep their subservient

position.

 

GAWD I FUCKING HATED THAT. was always getting an earful from my mom to be the damn spiritual leader an shit. Fuck that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to...

what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so

"inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes

use technology to adapt to and get around

disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

Apparently you haven't met many disabled people. Notice I said "people."

They are humans,

not apes. I know some who are quadriplegics:

they can't move anything below their necks, so

they can only get around in a wheelchair that

someone pushes. Because they can't speak,

they have to communicate with a device about

the size of an air-conditioner that is strapped to

their wheelchair. They spend most of their lives

in day care. People with severe mental

disabilities don't go to high school, not to

mention college. They get to sit in a play room

and make macaroni art.

 

Two things: I AM DISABLED.

 

And: What the fuck was God's "plan" for them, then?

 

1) I'm sorry for that, but you are not disabled like some people are or you would not be here.

2) I never said God has a plan for them. Terrible things just happen.

 

Mm, yeah, I should just feel so fucking lucky that I'm not "really disabled", unlike those other people who have it so much worse.

 

That's like saying I shouldn't complain about the abuse I suffered, because other women get it so much worse than I did.

 

It's fucking offensive.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to... what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so "inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes use technology to adapt to and get around disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

And if God "has a plan" for me? IT'S A SHIT PLAN! I could have done better, and I have NO ATTENTION SPAN!

 

Dont even get me started on stem cells, Christians and disabled people.

I've got a friend with spina bifida who was told he won't ever walk because his faith isn't strong enough.

Yeah, my dad was told that my glaucoma/other medical problems were caused by his lack of faith. I'd love to write the fucking douchebag who told him that and let him know that what he said was a big part of why I lost my faith.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Yeah, my dad was told that my glaucoma/other medical problems were caused by his lack of faith. I'd love to write the fucking douchebag who told him that and let him know that what he said was a big part of why I lost my faith.

I guess God does have a use for those evangelists after all :P.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Heard recently from preacher grandfather who was deriding those who don't follow his denomination: "Thinkin' is stinkin'."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anything said to or about a disabled person being "so brave" or "an inspiration" or how "god has a plan" and blah-de-blah.

 

Yes, because it take so much COURAGE to...

what? Lead a mostly-normal life? And it's so

"inspiring" because... oh, look, the bipedal apes

use technology to adapt to and get around

disabilities and injuries, how fucking INSPIRING!

 

Apparently you haven't met many disabled people. Notice I said "people."

They are humans,

not apes. I know some who are quadriplegics:

they can't move anything below their necks, so

they can only get around in a wheelchair that

someone pushes. Because they can't speak,

they have to communicate with a device about

the size of an air-conditioner that is strapped to

their wheelchair. They spend most of their lives

in day care. People with severe mental

disabilities don't go to high school, not to

mention college. They get to sit in a play room

and make macaroni art.

 

Two things: I AM DISABLED.

 

And: What the fuck was God's "plan" for them, then?

 

1) I'm sorry for that, but you are not disabled like some people are or you would not be here.

2) I never said God has a plan for them. Terrible things just happen.

 

Mm, yeah, I should just feel so fucking lucky that I'm not "really disabled", unlike those other people who have it so much worse.

 

That's like saying I shouldn't complain about the abuse I suffered, because

other women get it so much worse than I did.

 

It's fucking offensive.

 

I can't stop you from being offended at anything I say. It's your choice.

 

It sounds like you have been through some hard times and are still recovering. Best wishes for your future.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.