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Out...sort Of


ConureDelSol
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So, yesterday that episode of Family Guy where Meg becomes a fundy xtian was on (this is also the episode where Stewie spends the day with the cast of Star Trek: TNG).  Mom was watching it with me, and for the most part, she loves the show.  However, knowing that Seth MacFarlane is an atheist, she started getting mad with the way they were portraying xtians in the show (throwing things at Brian, refusing him service for being an atheist and book burning).  Then she made comments about how the thought that there are people that think there is no afterlife is sad.  I tried my best to explain to her why that idea isn't sad, but she just didn't get it.  Then Brian said something along the lines of "I bet the real secret to life is more amazing than we can possibly conceive."

 

So she said, "Well then why is he an atheist?"

 

"What?"

 

"How can he think that if he is an atheist?"

 

"Just because he's an atheist doesn't mean that he can't appreciate the wonders of the universe and how it was made."

 

"Yeah, but what is more amazing than God?"

 

I didn't really respond to that, but I did do the Picard double-facepalm in my head.  So I went to bed thinking that with her having a mindset like that, she would never be able to handle my coming out as an atheist.

 

So that was last night.  Today I went to my morning meditation group and came home.  My dad was out shopping, so it was just my mom and I.  She started about how our grandsitter (caretaker for the grandparents) is going to church with her today and that she can't wait for mother's day when I go with her because it will make her happy, even if it isn't so great for me.  Somehow, this launched into a civil religious discussion and she asked me point blank what my religious leanings are these days.

 

I said I am an atheist-leaning agnostic.  I'm technically an agnostic atheist, but it's pretty much the same thing right?  So after her history of totally freaking out when she discovered I didn't believe in Jesus anymore and that whole atheism thing last night, she was actually really cool about it.  She asked if I at least believed in a spiritual force or something to that nature, I said not really.  Then we got into a moral discussion as to why I disagree with certain religions and whatnot.  She's happy that I'm actually learning about other religions and that I'm being investigative.  She's also happy that I can simply agree to disagree about many topics.  I guess that surprised her because I get really worked up in conversations about gay rights and separation of church and state.  Like, so much so that I usually have to take an ativan to come down from raging lunatic mode.  

 

So anyway, I didn't technically say I'm an atheist, but I did say atheist-leaning agnostic.  So I suppose that as long as I make it sound as though I'm open to ideas, that she's okay.  I think she hears the word "atheist" and immediately thinks that means they are closed-minded.  So perhaps by setting a good example, I can show her that's not necessarily true.

 

I haven't been asked straight-on this question by my dad, but between our conversations and the AHA mail I get (I totally unchecked the mail box and am still getting the 'give us money' crap from them) I think he suspects.  It's also likely my mom will convey what she's learned to him.

 

So there you go.  I'm out, but in a fluffy non-threatening sort of way.

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Con...good to see you and congratulations!! Sounds like you are well on the right track. Stand tall and be proud of who you are!! Sometimes, I find you just got to 'feel' your way through these things. Sounds like you are doing an awesome job!! Hug!

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Congrats! That is a tough conversation but you handled it like a boss! Can you breathe a little easier now?

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Guest r3alchild

I enjoyed reading that, when brian says to meg that the meaning of life could be more amazing than any of us imagine, I thought thats what alot of people fail to realize. Christianity has had a choke hold over how people understood life for along time, but thats slowly changing.

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