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greylight
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My mom texted me that one of my former friend's from church's younger sister died in a car crash. She was in college, and even sadder was that this family's father died in the same way years before. She told me to pray for the family, and I got angry. I'm not particularly close him anymore, but he is a caring guy, and is faithful to god and his beliefs.

 

So, I wanted to say, this is how god rewards him? Bullying this poor family by killing the dad, and then if that wasn't enough the young lady who had her whole life head of her? FUCK that. This is one of the reasons I left this backwards faith. Now I'm seeing on my newsfeed members of the church saying things like "we have to trust god even when it doesn't make sense". Yeah, so he can go kill more people without explaining shit.

 

And like.... if people wonder why im not a xian anymore, this is why. I can understand why people can believe in a god that is just kind of there and doesn't give a shit about humans. But believing in a benevolent personal god is so totally beyond my comprehension now when shit like this happens. There is no order, nothing is 'working together for good'. Random shit happens and it sucks. Sometimes I still wish I can pray to this being, so i could feel like myself and the people I love are protected, but that's not going to happen. I dunno, this just brought up feelings for me and i needed to vent.

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I'm sorry for what yoi're goimg through. Thomgs like this were a huge contributing factor to my loss of faith as well.

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Guest Babylonian Dream

Sorry you're going through this. It's tough. And they just don't get it.....

 

Just remember, "God works in mysterious ways" is code for, "I don't know. I think it sounds bad too, although I don't want to admit it. But I'm too brainwashed to think God could either be really bad or not exist."

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Hey - I just went through this with a family member dying of brain cancer. The response from his family? "God will never leave us".

 

WTF?! I feel your anger.

 

FB is full of family and friends posting how comforted they are by a "loving father" who "will never abandon them". He gives your hubby brain cancer at 37, then kills him a year later and leaves his wife with 6 kids and a mortgage but from NOW ON he will "never abandon you"?

 

That crap drives me NUTS too!

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"we have to trust god even when it doesn't make sense"

 

The most outrageous thing I read in that sentence is that someone has the audacity to tell a grieving person what they HAVE to believe.

 

Hey, if the idea of god is comforting to you in grief, then by all means reach out to god.  But if you are grieving, and the idea of god is NOT comforting to you - no one should tell you that you have to reach out to god.  No one has the right to tell you how to feel at all.

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Guest r3alchild

Its funny how much god could do in our obscure past, but in this day with a camera on every phone no one records anything indisputable, that only god could do. Christianity today is as mass media driven as coke, its a religion of self help books and wishful thinking, a religion that rams its agenda based benefits down your throat like mcdonalds healthy choice meals. The simple message love your fucking neighbour has been turned into buy our mana bread and be blessed.

 

But one question I ask you jesus, if you knew what you were going to do was going to end up being like this, why oh why did you still do it! I say you jesus! are guilty of not loving your neighbour, because you knew and still did it.

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I hear you!!!!  Life is HARD.... and that's just it.  But to (a) say thanks to god for...whatever.... and (B) believe god will work things out.... that is just SOOOO lame!!!!!  Get of your butt and make things happen!

 

Problem is now, they believe it is god's will and will "trust" that god will work something for the good and guess what..... ain't gonna happen!

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I'm so sorry. That's really tragic. :( 

I wish people would just morph this stupid religion already. If people want to worship an avatar of unconditional love, compassion, and all the best of humanity has to aspire to, I wouldn't complain. It'd be a hell of a lot better than what Christianity is now. 

 

But to say God has some reason for allowing a young woman to be killed? No. There is nothing to trust in here. The girl is dead. If He could have prevented it and didn't, he's either a monster, not omnipotent, or really stupid. Or all three.

 

Oh, but He called her home! So? Why does He need yet another soul in Heaven when there were so many who needed her down here? 

 

There is so much in this world this God could fix and He wouldn't even have to DO anything except just appear, let Himself be tested to confirm He is who He says He is, and then just talk to us. Do a question and answer session or something. That's it. No need to impede on freewill or whatever. 

 

I wish only the best for you and this woman's family. I hope peace and love do find them and help them heal quickly from this trauma. 

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I'm sorry that you have to experience this.  It's bad enough when you lose someone.  The pain is only compounded when you realize your family are not going to be supportive because they can't help but make tradgedy all about their crazy concepts of god.

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You have it exactly right Liesbet. The idea that god's will is involved, no matter how horrible an event and that he will make everything right is a horrible attitude. In fact, it is opposite of what should be our attitude in a situation where something could be done to either correct the damage done, or if that

is not possible, then take some action so that someone else will not be damaged for the same reason. "All is well with the world" is a lie and a terrible attitude to adopt. bill

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Oh I'm sad for you. Life is so unfair. And at times like these there seem to be trite xian answers that echo from the past, rubbing old salt in old wounds.

 

As for being asked to pray, I just say, "Meh, God's not hearing me these days, so I'll pass..."

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Sorry you're going through this . It is really tough. Life is very hard sometimes. These stories are so hard to listen to. They break one's heart.

 

I didn't really even need the bible's contradictions to deconvert me...just look around at the world and you can see that the Christian god is not there......It probably was my main reason for dis believeing anymore.

 

Big hug for you today!!

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So sorry to hear of the loss of your friend.  Such a tragedy.

 

Now I'm seeing on my newsfeed members of the church saying things like "we have to trust god even when it doesn't make sense".

 

What they are saying is a coping mechanism and, though irrational, simply a way to try and make sense of randomness, tragedy, and deep loss.  By their very words they admit there is no explanation, but they cling to hope that maybe some higher power that they are incapable of understanding really is there like a helmsman at the wheel of a ship at sea being tossed in a hurricane.  The hurricane is terribly frightening and being tossed at sea a thousand of miles away from nearest land can be doom.  Knowing that someone is at least attempting to control the ship may not save their lives, but it gives them hope.  To carry this analogy a little further from the Christian perspective, God the Father may have caused the hurricane for some unknown reason, but Jesus is at the helm steering the ship to safety while the Holy Spirit is whispering encouragement to them.  All untrue, of course, but I can't blame someone from reaching out for hope in a time of tragedy.

 

The truth, of course, is that the hurricane has no purpose and is there because of various weather conditions.  The helmsman at the ship's wheel is probably more frightened than anyone else because he understands just how little control he has, and that voice giving hope is individual desperation and fear of death.  This reality, however, can be extremely difficult for many to accept so they choose not to accept it.  It's at least one reason why for many, leaving Christianity can be so difficult.  Accepting reality can be terribly frightening.

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