Popular Post Positivist Posted April 22, 2013 Popular Post Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 So, some of you may know I have become increasingly ill over the last few years and my suffering seems to have made it impossible to believe in the Lard. It turns out that my problem has a simple solution: gluten. I probably have celiac disease or at a minimum have a severe case of non-celiac gluten sensitivity. I have been so sick over the past 10 years in particular that I have wanted to off myself—that’s how sick I was. My symptoms—which I have had lifelong but that have severely worsened over the past 10 years—are atypical and resist diagnosis. So, I am baffled. I can’t figure out why the Lard never gave me a heads up about the simplicity of this problem/solution. Instead, my illness has driven me into the ground emotionally, psychologically, relationally, and yes, spiritually. At one point I even 'released' my husband, as he was going through hell with my illness too. He never left me, but I wanted him to be free of me. Why couldn’t Gawd have, in a prayer meeting, told someone about the source of my problem ("Hmmm. This is odd. I am getting a picture of a loaf of bread." or "Hmmm. Weird. The word "gluten" keeps coming to me.") Instead, I have suffered immense pain and hardship and existential despair, and have been two drugs away from being on welfare. I have been rendered infertile through this undiagnosed disorder, leading to further suffering. (Christbots blame me for my inability to conceive and my miscarriage--it's sin in my life, dontchaknow!) If the Lard had mentioned the whole gluten thing, I’d have steered clear and been able to procreate and wouldn't have been such an ill person over the last decade. I have been so sick I have wanted to die. The chronic pain drove me to atheism--not out of anger at Gawd, but simply because I believe chronic pain actually destroyed the neural pathways that support the possibility of faith. I feel like I literally lack the capacity for faith. Oh wait, maybe he did mention the gluten thing? Now I remember! When I was 6, I was listening to a Simon and Garfunkel album. “Ce-celiac, you’re breakin’ my heart…” Goddamit! Why didn’t I pick up this message?????? At the age of 6, was my heart so hardened already that I couldn’t hear the Werd of the Lard????? Well then, it's my own damn fault! God-fucking-dammit! At least I feel great now. I have my life back!! I feel GREAT! Thanks to no one but myself and my atheist/agnostic friends and my tireless search for solutions. And have I mentioned that I don’t miss the lunacy of being a fundagelical charismaniac nutter? It. Doesn’t. Work. So, to quote Alanis Morisette: Thank you India, thank you terror Thank you disillusionment Thank you frailty, thank you consequence Thank you, thank you silence The moment I let go of it was The moment I got more than I could handle The moment I jumped off of it was The moment I touched down I am free, at last. I am at peace. And the world is kinder than I anticipated it would be. There is life after faith. And it is good. Thank you. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted April 22, 2013 Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 But but gawd is just testing you..., silly fucktards have not had a reasonable explanation for why shit happens and yet it is there; shit happens. Glad you are sorted out and yes if you had not believed in the sky guru's non existent healing powers, you probably may have had another outcome. Praise their imaginary lard, my uber religious folks still relied on medicine for us kids. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RipVanWinkle Posted April 22, 2013 Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 I am so glad you are over your long visit to hell. You and people like you who have experienced so much pain are one the many reasons that I let go of the false faith. Your experience is totally inconsistent with an all-powerful, compassionate, loving god. And you told the story with both pathos and humor. Thank you for sharing. bill 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted April 22, 2013 Moderator Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 So, to quote Alanis Morisette: Thank you India, thank you terror Thank you disillusionment Thank you frailty, thank you consequence Thank you, thank you silence The moment I let go of it was The moment I got more than I could handle The moment I jumped off of it was The moment I touched down This^ 5 star post my girlfriend. ***** Thank you for sharing that pain. You are a rock....turning into a diamond. You are an encouragement for all. For every ounce of pain you've been through - I wish you double... double good things to happen.... I'm going to wish that for you as big as my wisher can wish! huge hug for you today...... A song dedicated to you today from the 70's!! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted April 22, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 But but gawd is just testing you.... I am soooo tempted to be passive aggressive and say to my fundy-in-laws: "You know, I've discovered that all of my symptoms are caused by gluten intolerance. I thought God was trying to teach me something through my suffering. Am I cheating by curing myself? I feel God has some work left to do through my suffering; I don't want to end the lesson early. What should I do?" 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blake Posted April 22, 2013 Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 Happy for you today and always, OP. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deva Posted April 22, 2013 Report Share Posted April 22, 2013 I wish you all the best Positivist, now and always. We all know how "God is testing you" is just a lie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator buffettphan Posted April 23, 2013 Super Moderator Report Share Posted April 23, 2013 So glad you figured out the gluten connection. Hope you'll be feeling better with each day. You [and your doctor(s)?] have certainly shown that nonexistent buybull god and all those who believe in him a thing or two -- like what it really means to be the True Omniscient and Omnipotent OnesTM. Take care, Pos. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RipVanWinkle Posted April 23, 2013 Report Share Posted April 23, 2013 Positivist: I double what Margee said. Nobody can say like she does. bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naughtyhamster Posted April 23, 2013 Report Share Posted April 23, 2013 This reminds me of the Christian website where these grandparents bought thier grandson some stuffed animals. The kid started developing allergies to the dust mites in the stuffed animals, but the pastor told the kid's parents it was demons in the toys that made the kid sick. Of course they didn't just get rid of the stuffed animals but just about anything in the boy's room that was considered demonic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted April 23, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 23, 2013 This reminds me of the Christian website where these grandparents bought thier grandson some stuffed animals. The kid started developing allergies to the dust mites in the stuffed animals, but the pastor told the kid's parents it was demons in the toys that made the kid sick. Of course they didn't just get rid of the stuffed animals but just about anything in the boy's room that was considered demonic. Wow. Just wow! If that doesn't make a person crazy, I don't know what does! Me when I believed this crap: Me as an atheist: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted April 23, 2013 Report Share Posted April 23, 2013 Positivist, I am so glad you found the cause of your physical problems and that you are doing better. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cousin Ricky Posted June 27, 2013 Report Share Posted June 27, 2013 It’s a good thing you aren’t Catholic. Catholic law requires the host to be made of wheat, and no exceptions are allowed. Not even for celiac disease. You can Google it. I recall a case where they put a little girl through hell over this (which actually shouldn’t be surprising considering the number of altar boys they’ve put through hell). This girl is taught that she cannot avoid burning in HELL forever unless she eats something that makes her violently ill. She is also taught that God made her. Our health insurance premiums will be paying for her psychotherapy. File under “redemptive suffering.” She gets time off purgatory (after she’s dead). Nice. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BendyLine Posted June 28, 2013 Report Share Posted June 28, 2013 That is an awesome post. I can relate, my health problems helped me along the path to atheism (although they were far from the only reason). And as an atheist, I feel better equipped to deal with them, even things that I know that will probably not be cured in my lifetime. The false hope that Christianity offers is crazy-making. You didn't happen to go to a charismatic church, did you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RipVanWinkle Posted June 28, 2013 Report Share Posted June 28, 2013 positivist: Tell your former Xtians it was not gluten intolerance after all. it was god intolerance. And you feel great. bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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