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Goodbye Jesus

Is God Retarded?


creative

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I cant get it out of my head so i guess ill just write it down.
If you ask me the bible god is the stupidest god ever to not have existed.

Now god knows everything right, and he can see the future because he has a DeLorean that can travel true time when it goes over 88mile per hour.

- God made 2 people called adam and eve and put a tree in front of them and told them not to eat the fruit, knowing that they would do it anyways. And when they did what he expected he got pissed off at them.

- Now god made people write a book called the bible.
- Then some people started building a tower that would reach the heavens.
And since god knew that they would succeed and he didn't want any visitors in the heavens he gave all the people working on the tower a different language. Wish he know would make them not be capable in working together and then the tower project was canceled due to financial problems and work problems.. and it eventually just collapse due to some storms that he knew where going to happen.
- Of course he knew that because of that no one would be able to read the bible anymore because he didn't instructed people to write it in different languages and that things would be losses in translations. But he knew it wouldn't mater because he knew that everyone would give it its own interpretation anyways.
- Then at one point god send his son Jesus to earth to get crucified to forgive peoples sin that he gave them in the first place (and of course he already knew he was going to do this when he gave people sin in the first place).
- Then god created created a ton of other religions and people without religion and send the christians out to convert them or burn them alive because they didn't want to listen to him (wish of course he already knew when he made them).
- God also knew that the atheists that he created would need some sort of proof of his existence to believe in him. Wish he of course on purpose didn't create because he likes to watch Christians get on atheists nerves and because he knows that the Christians would be realy bored and would pray all day and he wouldn't have any more time to relax.

So is god retarded?

p.s. if you have any more good ones to add plz let me know zDuivel7.gif

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  • Super Moderator

We can't understand the mind of God. I guess that's a good thing.

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We can't understand the mind of God. I guess that's a good thing.

 

If we could understand the mind of Man we could understand the mind of "God". After all, he is created in our image.

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Nah, the god of the Bible's not retarded. He's just using humans as his playthings. He's constantly pulling the strings and shouting, "Dance puppets dance!" It's all a big game for the man upstairs.

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You're hinting at something that sold me on source criticism. The Yahweh character comes across much less retarded once the sources are isolated and placed in their proper historical and cultural contexts. He's still a total asshole, mind you. But he's an asshole whose motives are more easily understood.

 

Take Batman, for example. Imagine if someone tried to splice together the campy 60's TV version, the Tim Burton/Joel Schumacher abortion, Chis Nolan's version and then put in interspersed clips from Zorro films all into a single edited-together bastardized 30-hour-long movie. Now imagine we took that movie, dubbed it in a 17th century Cantonese dialect and played it for audiences living in mainland China in the 25th century. That's pretty much what happened to the Yahweh/Elohim/El Shaddai/Elyon character. It's no wonder he looks like a maniacal retard.

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Maybe he's the ugly red-headed step child of the gods.

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