Jump to content

Are You Right With The Holy Farter?


Brother Jeff
 Share

Recommended Posts

My good friend Sister Zander sent me this glorious tract that she found at the post office. The Lard had evidently magically commanded that it be left there to later be found by Sister Zander. The following is my response:

 

scan0001.jpg

 

scan0002.jpg

 

Are you a Christian who believes that God is a good and righteous God? Have you not read His Word? The Bible says, “The Lord is a man of war…” (Exodus 15:3). God says, “I will make my arrows drunk with blood, and my sword shall devour flesh. (Deuteronomy 32:42).

 

God does not and cannot do right because he is wicked. Listen to His Word speak:

“Happy shall he be, that takes and dashes your little ones against the stones.” – Psalm 137:9

“Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.” – Numbers 31:17-18

“And the Lord our God delivered him before us; and we smote him, and his sons, and all his people. And we took all his cities at that time, and utterly destroyed the men, and the women, and the little ones, of every city, we left none to remain.” – Deuteronomy 2:33-34

“And we utterly destroyed them, as we did unto Sihon king of Heshbon, utterly destroying the men, women, and children, of every city.” – Deuteronomy 3:6

“And when the Lord thy God shall deliver them before thee; thou shalt smite them, and utterly destroy them; thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor shew mercy unto them.” – Deuteronomy 7:2

“And thou shalt eat the fruit of thine own body, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters, which the Lord thy God hath given thee, in the siege, and in the straitness, wherewith thine enemies shall distress thee.” – Deuteronomy 28:53

“And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass, with the edge of the sword.” – Joshua 6:21

And on and on goes the nauseating history of God either directly committing mass murder and genocide or ordering that it be done…

 

Link to the rest of it: http://religionisbullshit.me/are-you-right-with-the-holy-farter/

 

Glory!

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Judging by the skid marks on my underwear, I'd say that its quite safe to assume that The Holy Farter dwells within me.

 

Or his spirit does -- one of the three of the one anyway...

 

The Farter

The Smudge

And The Holy Skid Mark

Abutt...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just be warned, Brother Jeff, that all of those quotes are from the Old Testament. Christians like to point this out, and that Jesus somehow came to right all the OT stuff. Ummm... really? Did he specifically mention any of those atrocities? No. Did he tell people not to slaughter entire peoples because they are not of your own religion? If so, I think the Crusaders, for example, did not get that message.

 

I did click on the link and read the rest. There was one NT story: Ananias and Sapphira. (That did not involve Jesus, it was Peter.) They sold a possession and kept part of the money, giving the majority of the money to the church, as it were. They lied about the part they kept, and were smote dead (by god) on the spot for it. What's the moral of that story? Sell all your stuff and give the church your money, and don't lie about it? Or you must die? What about correcting people in brotherly love and all that?

 

If that were the case, most people in my former church would be dead. I know how many people are members there, I know the annual budget/giving numbers, and I know many of them say they "tithe" (10%). If they all truly gave 10% (OK, maybe they give some of it to other charities instead, but still...) the church budget/giving would be many, many times larger. (It's a very middle class/wealthy congregation.) I'd say most of them who say they tithe are lying. Death to them all? (Tithing is not required in my denomination, and many people openly admit that they don't, but the number who say they do would still make the giving amount phenomenally higher.)

 

Anyway... The point is still right on. If god does exist, hell yeah I'd be afraid of him! What a ruthless slaughterer!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderator

And the lord god said: ''You are all cattle waiting for the slaughter''.

 

God is so good.......woohoo.gif

 

 

 

not          Wendybanghead.gif 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also in the NT Rev. ch. 19 talks about all the totally badass metal killing stuff gods gonna do while wearing his "vesture dipped in blood"(Rev. 19:13) and rockin his awesome thigh tattoo of his own name. Oh BTW he's also loving everyone more than anyone can possibly imagine while doing so of course.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tracts? Just told someone the other day that for the past year every gf ive had have had more tracts than a southern baptist street preacher..... or is that track marks? Lol

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.